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Original poster

How soon before you move in together…

39 replies

Flutterbye22 · 07/08/2023 21:35

What would you say is the best time frame before considering moving in together?

personally speaking, I think this changes as you get older…

I would say 8-12 months is a good amount of time before progressing to the next stage.

what does everyone else think?

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 07/08/2023 21:39

We did 6mths but no young kids to consider and was 38 and 44 so not spring chickens

It felt right

My husband had sadly died and then met now dh 2

Life is too short and sadly tomorow doesn't always come so we went for it

Now 11yrs later - married 2yrs should have been longer by lockdown cancelled 2 of our weddings and have a 6yr mini blondes

I think if you have young kids it's a totally diff timescale

Wouldn't even introduce a new partner till 6mths to make sure things are in right direction

Doggymummar · 07/08/2023 21:41

We were three years, but I'm thrice divorced and more careful nowadays

CalistoNoSolo · 07/08/2023 21:41

Years and possibly never. And I say that as someone with an amazing and wonderful long term partner.

Aquamarine1029 · 07/08/2023 21:44

If there are NO children involved, and if you have the financial resources to split any time you want or need to, I don't think there needs to be any hard rules about when to move in together. For some, after five months may work, some people may need two years before it's right. You need to be smart, hope for the best, be ready for the worst, and keep your eyes open.

CamelSilk · 07/08/2023 21:44

8-12 months seems very quick to me - you're still getting to know each other at that point.

DH and I were 5 years (I realise this is maybe too far the other way!). That was 24 years ago now and we're still very happy.

cakecoffeecakecoffee · 07/08/2023 21:48

We’ve been living together since our 3rd date…. admittedly I did keep my own place for about 3 months, just in case.

We had no children to consider and were just absolutely smitten from the moment we met. Been together 12 years now, married and 2 DC.

I don’t think there is any set time but if kids are involved then it should definitely be much longer.

gogomoto · 07/08/2023 21:52

5 months, partly due to lockdown, didn't fancy living across the country

gogomoto · 07/08/2023 21:52

We knew this was for keeps within a couple of weeks Grin

Babdoc · 07/08/2023 21:54

Three days! When you know, you know. We were together until his untimely death 16 years later. Still love and miss him 31 years later.

SamW98 · 07/08/2023 21:56

My now ExDh moved into my flat after 4 weeks and we bought a house after 5 months. We were both 24 at the time and we stayed together 25 year and are still good friends.

Now I’m in my 50’s and divorced I would never live with a man again. That’s just my personal choice though

SomewhereWithSomeone · 07/08/2023 22:05

We were together almost 3 years before moving in together.

Iamclearlyamug · 07/08/2023 22:09

Um...3 weeks 🤦‍♀️🤣

Newtrix · 07/08/2023 22:17

8 weeks, been together 10 years, married for 5.

Simonjt · 07/08/2023 22:18

We did just shy of a year, he was staying for the night when we my son got a cough at the very start of covid, so due to the rules at the time he had to isolate with us for 14 days. He never left 😊

AuntMarch · 07/08/2023 22:20

My ex and I waited 3 years. I wouldn't want to do it again.

AuntMarch · 07/08/2023 22:20

I lied, 3 years was when we got engaged so maybe 2 for moving in!

toomanyleggings · 07/08/2023 22:21

After about a year and wedding date set.

AmyandPhilipfan · 07/08/2023 22:30

Just over two months from meeting my now husband to him moving into my rented flat. We were married just within 2 years of meeting. Been together now for almost 18 years. Sometimes you just 'know' that you've found your person and there's no reason not to be with them. That said, neither of us had kids. If kids were involved I would have waited much, much longer before moving him in and marrying him.

ConnieSaks · 07/08/2023 22:39

I moved in after 10 days (still together 40 years later!)

ConnieSaks · 07/08/2023 22:42

I should add close friend says this was only because his flat was near college and I didn’t have anywhere else to live!

RedWineRedFace · 07/08/2023 22:48

I think year and a half/2 years is a good amount of time before moving in together. Engagement around 3 years, marriage after 5?

RuthTopp · 07/08/2023 22:52

Chatted online for a few months , met up and got on very well . Moved in together within 2 months , still together 15 years later .

Mmhmmn · 07/08/2023 22:55

AuntMarch · 07/08/2023 22:20

My ex and I waited 3 years. I wouldn't want to do it again.

..Wait or live together?

Aquamarine1029 · 07/08/2023 22:58

My husband and I moved in together after six months, to be truthful it probably would have been sooner, but we were long distance at first. Still together and very happy 28 years later. We both knew we were the one right from the start.

AuntMarch · 07/08/2023 23:11

Mmhmmn · 07/08/2023 22:55

..Wait or live together?

Show quote history

Live together. If I'd ever lived on my own before, I don't think I'd have done it. Aside from saving money on splitting bills I don't understand the benefit of it.

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