I've been dating a friend from uni who I lost contact with and met again during the last year. He told me he had left an abusive relationship as his girlfriend used to hit him, bully him and she stole from him. He said he was arrested for harassment as he tried to get his stolen items back, namely a huge sum of money and she accused him of abuse.
My worry is something doesn't add up. Over the last year he has revealed small bits that to me make me believe he is lying and he is the abuser. The things are:
He said they were constantly off/ on again.
He said she banned him from talking to me and another girl however since dating I've noticed he does talk about all his female friends excessively and tells me he fancies them. I think he did the same with this girl and she must have felt uncomfortable.
He said she had mental health issue (all his exes do).
He mentioned when she hit him he had to restrain her once and he has evidence of her hitting him as he had bruises all down his back.
When they split he sent her things such as food she liked and this huge sum of money was sent after the split. To me it feels like he was trying to maintain contact.
He told me part of the arrest was she had a ring doorbell which had broken and he picked it up and put in his pocket. My gut is she bought this post split for safety reasons and when he realised it was there he tried to break it and steal to conceal evidence.
He doesn't seem upset over arrest and like its almost an achievement to tick off.
Accused her brother of constantly interfering and ruinig relationship but I think he was trying to protect her?
He also said they never officially split and he was just ghosted. More consistent with someone fleeing isn't it?
His arrest was over a year ago and still no conclusion.
He got jealous when she had a photo with a male friend (he told me this).
When we reconnected platonically to start with he said never say never about them dating again (way before I dated him).
She tried to get out of a moving car more than once.
I've seen small bits of behaviour with me that worry me. He is very clingy, ignores me if I don't do what he likes, makes back handed compliments about my looks and constantly accused me of cheating. He talks constantly about other women sexually but ets jealous if I mention a man platonically and accuses me of flirting.