I asked why he was on his phone so much and he went crazy.

[Laceymae33]

So long story short I’ve noticed my partner is on their phone a lot lately, I noticed it tonight more when I looked at him everytime he had his phone to the side texting so I simply just said why you always on your phone so much and my god I wish I never did he went ballistic at me swearing raising his voice saying I was accusing him didn’t accuse him once just asked why he was on his phone so much lately he made me feel real uneasy so I just walked away from the situation. This man doesn’t even want me on social media platforms but is on them himself he always is right and I just feel like the whole relationship is really eating me up. I can’t help but think I’m dealing with a narcissist here But I love him that much it seems to be blinding me how do I even leave a situation like this why am I so weak for this man any advice would be appreciated.

@Laceymae33 You are strong, he's made you think you're not. You're seeing it all for what it is now, for me and others in your shoes it's like the scales lifting from your eyes! Please do talk to Women's Aid, if you don't feel you can go to family or friends; they will help you through the steps so it's not so scary and you'll never be alone. Look here for your nearest or start chatting to them: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/

We're all here for you too x

My goodness. Sending you love. Its horrific what you went through. 🌺

@Pinkbonbon good advice

This is horrific reading

Please, PLEASE, get some support to leave this awful man

Now that you recognise this in yourself, what are you going to do about it?

I agree👍

You're in an abusive relationship and I'm really sorry for you and your child.

You've realised it now so now is the time for action. He won't be easy as he's a narc.

Do you have support around you? Or contact a woman's refuge.

The best thing you can do for yourself and you child is to leave. Fast.

Well, you know exactly why he doesn't want you on social media don't you! because he doesn't want you to see what he's up to.

This man is abusing you. You need to really accept that is what's happening.

How will you feel when he starts treating your child the same? because he will. He will be calling them names when they don't do what he wants. Is that what you want your future to look like?

You need to leave not just for you, but for your child as well.

What's your financial situation? you need to make a plan.

Also, good advice has been given to you, here's my bit, nothing huge.

Book two weeks of cosy cottage/Airbnb for yourself and by yourself someplace nice yet affordable

Then observe how much happier and more free you feel without all the stress

You can't have your own social media. Lol if hubby tried controlling me I would be off. That's not a relationship how odd

@LadyJ2023 That's not very helpful, unfortunately, because until you've been there you can't understand how they start with breaking you down bit by bit so you hardly notice, and it doesn't feel 'odd' at all because it's what you're used to and have been told it's all you deserve. Have you heard of the 'boiling frog' syndrome? The water heats up so gradually they don't realise they're burning until they're dead (more or less). This is how it feels. Once I finally saw it and got out I couldn't understand how it had happened to me, the 'real' me would never have stood for that behaviour! You feel so stupid and pathetic for 'letting it happen'. But you didn't let it happen, it was done to you. It's why it's called abuse.

That's why we're called survivors, though, because we've been through hell and come out the other side. OP you can get there too 😘

I've yet to see the poster you refer to, giving any constructive advice.

@Artycrafts maybe they need to learn some empathy...

it is me in my head the man has me so attached I feel like I’ll die without him does that sound crazy?

No, it doesn't sound crazy. But if you stay with him, you will die. Every last little bit of what makes you YOU will die. He will slowly and surely kill off every last bit. he's already half way there at least.

He has isolated you from friends, controlled what you do, he is very much a man who does what he wants, but does not allow you to do any of it.

He is an abusive prick OP. he is slowly but surely wearing you down. You won't die without him. You'll LIVE. You'll be able to find you again without his controlling presence taking up your head.

Please find a way out. he has manipulated you, but you are now seeing it all for what it is, and you just have to take that next step.

His phone is a total red herring, you have far bigger issues than if he is a cheating arsehole (which unfortunately he very likely is).

Do you want your son to treat his future partner this way? Because by staying you're teaching him that his kind of controlling, abusive behavior is normal. And your son will continue the cycle unless you get him out of the situation.

Your partner won't let you see his phone because he is doing something inappropriate on it, if not having a full-blown affair, which is also quite possible.

As for love, I highly doubt what you feel for him is real love. Dependence and fear isn't love. He most certainly does not love you back.

You've gotten caught up with an evil, manipulative man. Please get away from him and get counseling to explore what in your psychological makeup or personal history has caused you to be subsumed by him.