The Male Ego.

[Darlington99]

I lost touch with my best mate but he's made contact. We went out for a drink and looked forward to having great times like we did many years ago. But to my surprise, I've discovered that he slept with my wife before I met her. Neither of us discussed much about our previous relationships, but my male ego won't accept this situation. We've now talked it over and she said that she couldn't care less if I had slept with all her friends in the past before we got married. I don't want to know him any more but she just thinks I'm being stupid. Any thoughts ?

It’s not about male ego, it’s about the fact neither the wife nor best friend told the op. It’s really about the deception.

I agree with this. If this was a woman posting to say she'd only just found out her DH Had slept with her best friend before they got married the responses would be very different.

I don't think this is a "male ego" issue, I think plenty of people would be upset whichever way round.

For me the secrecy/lack of honesty would be the bigger issue, especially if you all used to socialise as a group before you lost touch

Male or female I think a lot of people would initially feel a bit off about this
this isn’t purely a male ego thing

When I was younger there were two sets of people out of bounds (other than the illegal ones) - your mate's sisters and your mate's ex-girlfriends

So this situation would be a bit odd to me although it did happen before you got together with your wife and you were unaware.

Just move on - I would actually be more put off by the old mate bringing it up

You're upset about two people sleeping together when they were free and single.

I've decided that the past is the past and can't be altered

But what about the TARDIS?