Creepy ex - I need a restraining order but don’t know how

[Firsttimemother2022]

Me and my ex broke up in March but we have a son together so it’s not as easy as ‘cutting him off.’ I have however maintained that contact with our son is to be through his mother or my sister.
Anyways, since breaking up he has not respected that boundary and has turned up at my house and left notes through the door. He never signs his name so proof that is him.
I’ve just ignored it in hopes that he will get bored and leave me alone.
But the other night I woke up and it must’ve been about 4/5am since it was still dark outside, and I opened my eyes to see him sat on my bed watching me.
The crazy thing is I just went back to sleep 😮 and when I woke up in the morning he was gone. My doors are always locked so I’m guessing he climbed through the windows since they were open at night due to the heat.
Long story short he is a weirdo and I’m now paranoid to even have my windows open. I have looked online about getting a restraining order in place but it says I need evidence. Does anyone know how ‘strong’ the evidence needs to be? I have no records of phone calls etc from him as I’ve changed my number. I literally have no proof that he is harassing me. Will the courts just believe me? As it’s my word over his?

I'm sorry no matter how exhausted you are you would not have gone back to sleep in that scenario.

I don't believe that for one second.

I think you were dreaming.

Your baby won't be taken. At the most, if he made reports to police that they reported to social services theyd open a case, do an assessment and get your permission to check cross agencies eg with your doctor, health visitor etc and then see you haven't had severe mental health problems or even if you had that you don't currently, come round or have a chat over the phone and close the case as a malicious referral

Happened to me several times. I actually do have a mental health diagnosis but it's been a family member who I've since cut contact with who would decide I was ill if I disagreed with them on anything

You don't need to worry about baby being taken even if you hear from a social worker, they will be very familiar with abusive exes and may even have some support they can offer you if you do need to consider fleeing- a social worker can also give you a support letter for priority council housing

Sorry you're going through this- I would invest in the cam doorbell and also get some new window locks installed and a firesafe post bag. I would add security lights too that come on in the dark when someone approaches the house

Let's be honest
Who is going to look like the mentally unstable one.
You?
Or the bloke who keeps breaking in through your window to talk to you ?
No one is going to take your child just keep reporting it, keep a log of everything and get advice from womens aid and legally.
You need to be taking this more seriously

He’s in the wrong, he knows he’s in the wrong so he’ll say anything to deflect from himself. Think the child who gets caught with chocolate around their mouth but denies stealing the buttons. Ignore everything he says.
Report to the police everything he has done, every note, every call.
Tell them you need a risk assessment and help to protect yourself and your baby.
Electric fans — don’t leave any windows open at night, anywhere. Or when you go out.

Well unless the police are extremely gullible they won’t believe you let him in when he actually injured his hands breaking in.
Stop giving any thought whatsoever to what he says. Follow the advice people are giving here - take his actions as a serious threat, note and record all the incidents, report everything to the police and don’t be fobbed off.

Oh give over.

Maybe she didn't quite wake up. Have you never been sort of woken by something but then sleep sucked you back in? And then the next morning you realise what stirred you.

Amd considering he did it a second time last night and she had to call the police it appears you were wrong not to believe her.

Also, just a thought but if he is gaining access to her home, how do you know he isn't putting something to make her sleep deeply in her milk in the fridge or something?

People don't just get kids taken off them like that.

But go to the police and see about making a proper statement about last night. Tell them you're terrified he will break in again.

The best offence is a good defence.

A ex neighbour has a crown court ordered restraining order with no end date which means unless he or I go back to court to change it it will last forever.

he can’t come within 100 meters of my street ( where he used to live - lost his house because of what he did and the RO and can’t come within 100 meters of myself or DH either

we actually went back to court to get a variation of the initial restraining order which was no contact
and the judge changed it to include distance

everthing he did we just reported to 101 and got a crime ref number

when the shit hit the fan he tried to say it was us but he had never made a single complaint however we had made numerous reports about him over the years about what he had done and this was all used as evidence against him

Get cctv and a ring doorbell

send a solicitors letter detailing that he is not to contact you except via your mother at x address.

give a copy to the police

report him every time he breached it

Did the officers suggest brightsky and the hollieguard app. You might find them useful

This is petrifying, are you okay @Firsttimemother2022 xx