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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Been blocked (I think)- feel unreasonably sad!

59 replies

lotusx · 09/06/2023 14:28

I was dating a guy for a short while, around 10 weeks. We left things on good terms (or so I thought!). He was leaving the country to work away for an undetermined length of time. A bit gutting because he ticked all my boxes but life happens. We left the door open so if we were both single when he got back, we may date again but that was that for now. We last saw each other on Friday and he left the country on Saturday, on Monday I tested positive for Covid and thought I best give him the heads up since we’d been in close contact and he has some health conditions that make him eligible for antivirals. I went to message him on WhatsApp and he was online but I got sidetracked when I was typing my message as the phone rang. When I went back to finish messaging him I noticed I could no longer see his last online status so I presume I’ve been blocked.

To be honest I was already feeling a little bit down about things ending but now I feel hurt about suddenly being blocked. I only block people in extreme circumstances so I feel bad that I’ve done something that he warrants being block worthy! I’m a people pleaser and hate the thought of upsetting people so this is making me feel awful! 😓

OP posts:

retinolalcohol · 09/06/2023 17:51

This 'you shouldn't be invested' is utterly, utterly bizarre. Are some people here just continuing to date men they're completely indifferent towards? Dating for 10 weeks and not starting to like that person? Essentially starting to like someone is an investment. I would consider even a third date a waste of my time if there wasn't a level of 'investment' from me or them at that stage.

It's normal to feel the way you are OP. If you're one ticked, can't see his profile picture or online status you probably have been blocked. You've just got to think that if he lacks emotional maturity in such a way, you've not lost anything by him doing this. He wasn't who you thought and never could've been who you needed him to be!

MaxwellCat · 09/06/2023 18:00

Come on op you must know how WhatsApp works if you can see his pic you’ve not been blocked everyone knows that 🙄

WunWun · 09/06/2023 18:02

You've definitely not been blocked if you can see his profile pic :)

WunWun · 09/06/2023 18:04

Goatbilly · 09/06/2023 15:05

You shouldn't care whatsoever after only having been "dating" for 10 weeks. You seem to overinvest quickly. Maybe he already had someone else lined up?

This is such a fucking stupid thing to say 😂

Imagine continuing to see someone for 10 weeks if you didn't care whatsoever about them!

AceofPentacles · 09/06/2023 18:04

I'm going with he has a new sim for a phone belonging to the country he's working in and hasn't checked his uk phone

WunWun · 09/06/2023 18:05

Oh, I just clocked the username.

JamSandle · 09/06/2023 18:05

Goatbilly · 09/06/2023 15:05

You shouldn't care whatsoever after only having been "dating" for 10 weeks. You seem to overinvest quickly. Maybe he already had someone else lined up?

Time has nothing to do with feelings. What a weird take.

leopard22 · 09/06/2023 18:06

MaxwellCat · 09/06/2023 18:00

Come on op you must know how WhatsApp works if you can see his pic you’ve not been blocked everyone knows that 🙄

Clearly not...

ComeOnThenFanny · 09/06/2023 18:07

Is his new address 1 Yemen Road, Yemen? 😉

Only teasing, OP. It doesn't sound like he's blocked you anyway x

YinYogi · 09/06/2023 18:14

ComeOnThenFanny · 09/06/2023 18:07

Is his new address 1 Yemen Road, Yemen? 😉

Only teasing, OP. It doesn't sound like he's blocked you anyway x

This was exactly my thought! 😂

Original poster

lotusx · 09/06/2023 18:20

So it appears I have jumped to conclusions since I can still see his profile photo. 😅

An international sim actually makes a lot of sense….

My bad, as you were everyone 🙃

I’ll be in the corner pouring myself a glass of wine and chilling out 😂and brushing up on the rules of WhatsApp which I clearly don’t know anything about

OP posts:

YoSof · 09/06/2023 18:37

lotusx · 09/06/2023 18:20

So it appears I have jumped to conclusions since I can still see his profile photo. 😅

An international sim actually makes a lot of sense….

My bad, as you were everyone 🙃

I’ll be in the corner pouring myself a glass of wine and chilling out 😂and brushing up on the rules of WhatsApp which I clearly don’t know anything about

Actually sometimes you can still see the profile picture for a while after being blocked.

If you click on the profile picture so it goes full sized, wait a minute and see if it disappears to the generic greyed out face icon then you’ve been blocked.

If you do that then come out of it, and can still see the profile picture you’re not blocked.

Tryingtoconceivenumber2 · 09/06/2023 18:37

@ComeOnThenFanny literally thought the same thing x

YoSof · 09/06/2023 18:40

Sorry so click on it to go to this page, then click on the profile picture so it goes full sized, wait a minute and see if it changes, then you’ll know.

I found this out recently!

Been blocked (I think)- feel unreasonably sad!

MaxwellCat · 09/06/2023 18:44

leopard22 · 09/06/2023 18:06

Clearly not...

Show quote history

I think op knew full well….click bait

Cakencookieobsessed · 09/06/2023 18:44

Goatbilly · 09/06/2023 15:05

You shouldn't care whatsoever after only having been "dating" for 10 weeks. You seem to overinvest quickly. Maybe he already had someone else lined up?

Who are you to tell someone what they can and can't care about? 10 weeks is almost 3 months. Although it's not like they were about to get married and have kids, it's enough time to get to know someone and start to develop a few feelings, so understandably she might be a bit upset to discover she's blocked. OP, I think all you can do is acknowledge that people act is strange ways and that it's probably not personal to you.

thisthenthat · 09/06/2023 18:54

lotusx · 09/06/2023 16:37

I can see his profile photo but I thought you could see that even if you’ve been blocked, just no future changes to the photo?

is the about section just where you click on their name? (I’m terrible with anything like this 😅)

Goodness, I never thought about it just being a line- that seems like a really elaborate excuse to call things off?!

Haven't read the full thread sorry is this has already been outlined, but if you open the picture and tap on it, it will disappear if you've been blocked. If you tap on it and it remains you are not blocked.

thisthenthat · 09/06/2023 18:55

MaxwellCat · 09/06/2023 18:00

Come on op you must know how WhatsApp works if you can see his pic you’ve not been blocked everyone knows that 🙄

Not true. You will see it for a while, unless you open it up and actually try to view it.

Original poster

lotusx · 09/06/2023 18:55

The friends references have made me chuckle 😂

I think the 6 hours sleep in 4 days thanks to Covid may have go to me on this occasion….

Thanks @YoSof just done that and all good so I’m just being over dramatic 😂

In my defence (as someone who tends not to get blocked every week to know such things) the WhatsApp website says you won’t see future updates to the profile photo not that you won’t see ANY photo. 🤦🏻‍♀️

OP posts:

YoSof · 09/06/2023 19:15

Ahh glad you’re not blocked!

xfan · 09/06/2023 19:18

There most likely won't be a relationship but you're investing all this headspace trying to figure out if you're blocked or not....are you worried you won't meet anyone else? Can't be bothered with Old misery?3 months and you're fretting over this? Do you have low self-esteem?

Snoozingagain · 09/06/2023 20:23

thisthenthat · 09/06/2023 18:55

Not true. You will see it for a while, unless you open it up and actually try to view it.

Show quote history

This is correct, you will still see it.. from someone who knows

GonnaGetGoingReturns · 09/06/2023 20:34

I’m not going to go back and forth with the blocking and unblocking but I will say this. If he was interested he’d keep in touch with you, make plans to travel to see you and vice versa. Him not doing that and saying see what happens when he returns is a very easy get out clause so I’d leave it as a nice time with him for 10 weeks but nothing more.

Zanatdy · 09/06/2023 22:01

This happened to me - same in that online status wasn’t visible. I messaged him via work IM to say can’t believe you blocked me. 3wks later he message me in the middle of night to say I just saw your IM (at work, at 3.45am?!) and I didn’t block you. But now I can see his online status again so I do think he did. A friend blocked me to test and I couldn’t see her photo but I could see his. So not sure, but 1 tick you probably have been blocked

supercali77 · 10/06/2023 07:02

The photo does dissappear. I've just tried it between tablet whatsapp and phone WhatsApp. Though both are android...maybe iPhone version is different and keeps the photo but never updates?

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