Weightloss. Am I being ridiculous?

[Toomuchtothinkabouttoday]

I've been promising myself I'll lose weight for a while but not quite managed to get myself into the headspace for it! I didn't have a lot to lose - just a stone and a halfish - and just kept putting it off.

Anyway, I've now lost 18lb and I'm 4lb away from my target weight.

I started seeing my boyfriend when I was the heavier weight and, in the time I knew him beforehand when he said he'd had a crush on me, I'd already lost a stone and a half. He said he'd not noticed. He also said that my weight doesn't define me and all that and that he'd love me whether I gained or lost weight.

I gain and lose weight proportionally so I feel that when I look at myself, I can't really see a difference but I've lost 3 inches from both my waist and hips and yesterday wore a dress I haven't fitted into for around 8 years. So, realistically, I must look different.

Anyway, yesterday, he made a few 'appreciative' comments about the weightloss. Just that he could see the difference, that I have an hourglass figure now (I did before - I was just bigger but now there's not so much fat to spread when I lie down!) and, when we got into bed last night, he put his hand on my tummy and noted that there was less of it now. There is. It's true. I still have a small tummy but that's my age and a c section for you!

He hasn't made any comments about preference or fancying me more but it's made me feel really uncomfortable and I don't know why. Like all the stuff before was just him paying lip service to weight not being important/him finding me no more or less attractive because of it? I don't know!

I think if I asked him, he'd probably just say he was being encouraging and supportive. Which I can see. But it's just made me feel really uncomfortable.

Thanks. Tbh I've found it really easy this time. I finally get what people say when they say a switch flicked and they just did it.

My target is another 4lb. I won't be slim then but I'm already in the normal bmi range. My body fat is still quite high although in the 'acceptable' range.

I'm going to see how I look and feel in another 4lb and decide what to do then. I wouldn't lose more than another half stone after that though. I could just do with getting my body fat down a bit

Followill he said again last night that he could tell I'd lost it. I can see in clothes but naked I don't think I look any different.

He said I did. "Not better or worse just different". So I'm trying to just see it as a positive now 👍🏻

I totally get where you're coming from. When you're sensitive about your weight, or have been in the past, it becomes a very emotionally charged topic. You just need to acknowledge that and know that he isn't saying these things from a bad place.

He obviously loves you regardless, but he was trying to pay you a compliment and saying that you look good. It doesn't mean he only loves you more now that you've lost weight.

I know it's not quite the same but think about when you wear a nice dress and someone compliments you and says you look really good today. They're being nice, they're not trying to say that you looked awful yesterday.