Porn suddenly accessible on our broadband.

[Usernameless16]

Before I accuse my DH, just looking for some knowledgeable advice.

Should porn content be automatically blocked on our home Wi-Fi broadband? We are with EE. Previously it did not show up, but just checked, and suddenly you can access porn again.

DH has had previously looked at porn and it has caused rows.

Was going to suggest the same.

Porn blocking must be a bit hot or miss. A determined and tech savvy person can find it without using the World Wide Web (what many people call 'the Internet'), which is what those ISP 'blocks' do. In any case, they use lists of known porn sites, and there are always going to be new ones.

Talk about stereotyping... men are not the only ones who look at porn.

Something tells me you are a man…am I right?

@Usernameless16 - let’s not make it about people’s attitude to porn. Men and women do watch it, and it doesn’t create issues in many relationships.
But that doesn’t matter.

Is this the main issue in yours? You do understand that checking wifi settings for whether your H may possibly be able to access porn - is a huge red flag as to the status of your marriage.
Why are you not just getting a divorce?

I understand OP. My ex used to watch porn ( the type that massively degrades women) This then turned into trying to carry out the sexual acts with me. At one point he forced himself on me while I was asleep. I threw him out not long after.

If he has done it, he hasn't gone to much trouble to cover his tracks. If he wanted to he could simply disable it, watch it and then re-enable it without too much effort and very little chance of being caught.

But it clearly does matter to OP and she's clearly communicated that to her partner.

It seems like an intermittant failure of the safesheild to block porn for whatever reason.

Seriously though, it seems like your obsessed and regularly "checking" for porn.
Stop it, thats not healthy for you, him or the relationship, its controlling and futile if he wanted to look at porn theres a thousand ways he could do it without using your home wifi.

If theres NO trust - realise it and end it.

Block it. Leave a week or so and look to see if he's unblocked

There’s always at least one if you post about sex or porn. Always 🙄

You have an, issue with porn, that's your boundary in your relationship , fair enough.

I watch porn and I'm a woman and I know my DP does, although I don't ask. Not a boundary in my relationship.

Stop looking for reasons to not leave an obviously crap relationship

Just know he will gaslight me over this, and say it wasn’t something he altered. Need to come at him with solid proof so he can’t. He just lies and minimizes all of it.

Then OP there is no reason to stay in this marriage, whether he is trying to currently access porn or not. He lies, doesn't respect your feelings and carries on with whatever he wants to, regardless if it's detrimental to your marriage.

This isn't healthy and he won't change. So what do you want to do?

Do you check his phone too?

He probably watches it on that. Either way, why be so bothered he treats you bad

Good Lord, this isn’t a healthy way to go on. If he’s making you so miserable you don’t need ‘proof’ to leave. With the greatest of respect this is almost neurotic, testing the Wi-Fi to see if porn sites are enabled? Just leave!

Wow.... you think he can only access porn via Sky?... what will you do disable his phone too?..

This.

It’s honestly nuts.

I have no idea whether our adult filter is on or not. Probably not because DH likes to bet a quid on football at the weekend 🤷‍♀️

But it really is neurotic to search for porn sites just in case!

Then it seems some sites the system is not blocking and other sites it could be, and or depends on the device itself

You do realise your DH can probably access porn from his phone using his network data rather than WIFI don't you? It's easier than ever to access tbh.

I read that as "Porn suddenly available on my breadboard". I thought, wow, now that's a post and a half!....but then put my glasses on!...

I'm with sky broadband and I'm sure porn comes under the same block as online gambling, I don't have mine on as I use casino sites never actually checked if porn is blocked or not

I wouldn't waste your energy. Instead focus on getting your ducks in a row financially, and make your plans discreetly, to leave him and ensure a better future. 🌹