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Original poster

Do you forgive cheaters?

53 replies

Jessie1995 · 30/05/2023 09:46

Hi everyone,
I have been with my partner for 8 years have a house a dog and are engaged. Even went to view our wedding venue Saturday.

found out Sunday that he has been texting a girl from work ( I have not seen the texts as they were deleted) and flirting with each other, which ended up as a kiss on a work night out. He has told me it has gone no further than this.

I also found out that her partner found out and got her to block my partner on all social media/text etc. my partner then tries to find a way to contact her and finds her on another social media site to message her. He proceeds to send her a birthday present- whilst saying he didn’t have much money for my birthday!!

I feel so sad and hurt and haven’t stopped crying.

8 years a house a dog is a lot to throw away I still love him but is that too much?

have any of you been cheated on before and forgiven your partners and how did it work out? / how long did it take?

OP posts:
Water1 · 24/07/2023 23:16

Hello, my partner of over 20 years cheated on me. I have never felt pain like it. He had been seeing another woman for over 10 months when I found out. All the time he was saying he was confused and wanted to be on his own and didn't know how he felt. I told him to leave. It turned out he was planning his wedding to the other woman the whole time and was basically manipulating me into 'forcing' him to leave so he could say I made him leave so he didn't feel guilty .

So my advice is not to trust a cheater, their own guilt will make them lie about everything and blame everyone else. It's all rubbish and the pain and grief is devastating.

longwayoff · 25/07/2023 18:27

I wouldnt forgive a betrayal, especially if doubled up on by adding implausible lies to an explanation. It feels to me that someone who would treat a partner like this would simply take forgiveness as weakness and use it as 'permission' to do it again. Don't let anyone treat you like this.

Catoo · 25/07/2023 18:42

Sorry to hear this OP.

I forgave mine twice. And he’s just done it again so I’m done.

Sounds like yours is or was still trying to pursue the relationship with this OW. Even if she says no to him and stays faithful to her partner now, yours has shown you who he is.

Sending hugs. I know it’s awful but you will have better times and days. X
🌸

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