My dating boundaries need kicking in to touch

[LostMyUserName]

I’m far too concerned with worrying about other people’s feelings and will put my own needs and wants secondary. I am working on this but need help from those of you comfortable saying “I’ve changed my mind”.

I matched with Mr car boot earlier today and I enjoyed our chat. We arranged to meet for coffee later this week. I revisited his profile this afternoon and he seems to have updated it with additional photos. That look very different 😳

Had I have seen the recent photos beforehand, I wouldn’t have matched or agreed to a date. I’m now not looking forward to meeting him and think I should cancel but I’m worried about what to say. Can anyone help me with some phrases I can use in these situations?

You clearly do have issues saying no as not able to send a change of heart text. I'm guessing he couldn't believe his luck when you agreed to chat. You get this a lot with OLD, men well below your league will chat, you do need to stand firm.
I've noticed, if you are in the over 40 age range, that there is obvious ageing in appearance of men who smoke.
Given that he pinned you down to meeting on the same day you started talking, I think he moved fast to secure a date knowing that you are probably out of his league. You've also gone along with it at a quick rate, usual would be at least a few days of chat, taking it to whattsapp, and then a phonecall before arranging a meet. I think you've let him skip a few steps here.

I take all your points on board @Opentooffers. I agree men are usually more bold in approaching attractive woman. I find typically attractive men quite intimidating, I’d much prefer to spend time with someone I feel relaxed with. He did say he isn’t keen on lots of messaging and would prefer to meet sooner rather than later (that was a general statement on his profile rather than specifically to me).

I’ve asked for his number but haven’t yet shared mine. He wanted to meet the following day but I suggested later in the week and I suggested location and he has been pretty agreeable.

It did occur to me that if he can’t believe his luck then he might treat me really well.