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Original poster

To be fed up being told I must put on weight. .

35 replies

Beebop05 · 20/05/2023 21:55

I've always been small and skinny even when I was pregnant, my bmi is in the healthy range. And I just want to clarify that I do not or ever had an eating disorder. Am now so fed up with people commenting on my body and how am too 'thin' and how I must have found it hard to attract a man. And that I have a child's body etc etc etc. Anyway..... Rant over.... Thought we were meant to be all inclusive/anti body shaming society. Does anyone else get annoying comments on their body?

OP posts:
Thinkwicebeforeyouleavemylife · 20/05/2023 21:58

This annoys me so much op. Somehow its OK to be rude and judge a slim person but you'd never dare do the same to someone overweight! I'm sorry people are like this with you, I get it too.

Xx

Thinkwicebeforeyouleavemylife · 20/05/2023 21:59

I get comments that I must be anorexic just because I'm petite which is so unkind and nasty to people who actually have anorexia, which is a mental illness and actually very little to do with weight.

gemloving · 20/05/2023 22:02

Same here. My BMI is actually classed as underweight but there is nothing I can do about it, I then get questioned if I always eat this much. I love food but unable to put on weight although at the moment I'm pregnant and it's in a healthy range in terms of weight gain.

I got used to it over the years but people do continue to comment.

gemloving · 20/05/2023 22:03

Even the whole "snap back" after having had my children. Just because you think I look like before, this doesn't mean I feel like that, mentally or physically. It's all just not ok.

Original poster
Beebop05 · 20/05/2023 22:06

Am just so sick of people thinking they have the right to basically put me down or assume that there's something wrong with me. Am a grown woman!!!

OP posts:
calmandcaffeinated · 20/05/2023 22:06

Bizarrely I lost a ton of weight in the last 6 months, meaning I went from being 4-5kg above my pre pregnancy weight to being about 10kg. No one dared comment when I was over but now everyone is commenting. I understand that people might be concerned, but it's actually bothering me a lot and one colleague (female) asked me how many cup sizes I had gone down as my boobs had just gone. I don't know why it's ok to comment on people's weight if they're on the lighter side rather than the heavier side.

Staygoldponyboystaygold · 20/05/2023 22:10

I was a healthy bmi, but looked very thin in my 20s. I have filled out a bit since. Everyone used to comment a lot. It used to make me feel really uncomfortable, some comments were quite catty. I never comment on anyone’s size, it’s absolutely none of my business.

Original poster
Beebop05 · 20/05/2023 22:40

It's horrible isn't it, sorry to hear this. I don't understand why people feel the need to make comments like this when you are a

OP posts:
Original poster
Beebop05 · 20/05/2023 22:41

A healthy bmi... Therefore weight that you should at that somehow it's wrong????

OP posts:
Emmamoo89 · 20/05/2023 22:45

I'm sick of comments saying that I should be fat the amount of food I eat 🙄 for one I breastfeed so need to keep my calories up and pregnant again. Even before I got the comments. Makes me not want to eat in front of them!

Alcemeg · 20/05/2023 23:11

Totally relate. I'm a fat old fuck now, but back when I was super fit I got a lot of criticism for being "skinny". I was strong and healthy! Take no notice OP, in retrospect I suspect this is jealousy talking.

DietrichandDiMaggio · 20/05/2023 23:32

You've posted this in relationships- who is saying these things to you?

Original poster
Beebop05 · 21/05/2023 05:45

Mostly work colleagues and some 'friends' and the odd family member. It's been over the years but my tolerance levels probably now not the same as am entering perimenopause. Work colleague made a comment when we were talking about holiday clothes that I must struggle to 'looknice' in a swimsuit as 'no curves!'

OP posts:
Cupcakekiller · 21/05/2023 10:11

It's jealousy. I'm jealous but would not make a comment like that.

booboo24 · 21/05/2023 10:36

I get this, in my teens and 20's I never got above 7st 3lb (I'm 5ft 2" so not as awful as it sounds), I even had a competition with another girl at work to see which of us could get to 7.5 st, neither of us made it! I ate so much but always got comments from people who didn't know me that well about how I must live on lettuce leaves etc I can remember saying once at work that if I was overweight noone would be saying a word, I couldn't help that fact that my hip bones protruded slightly & was really self conscious of myself for years. I had my youngest when I was 25 and went back to my weight, but after having my 2nd 5 years later I did keep some of the residual weight, even only 1/2 stone but it made all the difference and I finally felt a bit more at ease with myself. I'm still forever getting comments along the lines of "no wonder you're always cold, you need some meat on your bones" or "go on have another cake, you need it" or "oh there's nothing to you is there - a strong wind would carry you off" etc etc etc always said infront of others as they don't realise that it's actually quite annoying and the younger me would have felt so embarrassed and ashamed of myself.

Greeneyedminx · 21/05/2023 16:41

I have been underweight and overweight and people still feel they should comment about my size and weight.

Fat people know they’re fat and thin people know they’re thin, no need for anyone to comment about anyone’s size, it’s just plain rude and not needed.

lljkk · 21/05/2023 17:01

What is your weight & height, OP?

GreyCarpet · 21/05/2023 17:13

Interesting that a lot of you commenting that this is happening are in the normal bmi range.

I'm at the top of the range (bmi is 25.5) and I could definitely stand to lose some (as random men are fond of telling me 🙄)

I wonder if so many people are overweight now that we've come to see that as 'normal'.

I also think that, when people struggle with their own weight (ie keeping it down) they assume you must be restricting what you eat hugely to be slim.

When people find it easy to put weight on and hard to lose it, I think they just can't imagine some people don't put weight on.

Thar might explain it but it doesn't mean it's OK. People should keep their opinions on other people's weight to themselves!

GreekDogRescue · 21/05/2023 17:34

I’ve had this most of my life. One annoying friend always says “oh you’ve lost weight” when I see her even if I’m the same weight as usual.
Im always trying to put weight on but people don’t understand it’s as hard as trying to lose it.
It’s ok to tell people that they are tall and/or thin. Just leave them alone!

fdgdfgdfgdfg · 21/05/2023 17:38

Have you tried replying with "Well aren't you a cunt?"

I've always found that it works well when people comment on my weight, shuts them right up.

InSpainTheRain · 21/05/2023 17:45

I haven't seen that you mention who makes these comments... but what do you say back? "No, I don't need to put weight on at all! I think people have become so used to seeing obesity thay worry when they see someone at a healthy BMI" and see how they take it.

Ringmaster27 · 21/05/2023 18:03

Yep.
I come from a family of petite women 🤷🏻‍♀️ It is what it is. I did suffer with disordered eating as a teenager but that was a direct result of the sport I competed in. I now have a healthy relationship with food…I’m just little!!
”you look like you need a good meal” and “blokes like something to grab onto” have got a built old now! 😑😑

5128gap · 21/05/2023 18:05

I get told I'm too thin all the time since losing weight and reaching a BMI of around 21. It doesn't bother me in the least. Firstly I know I'm not. Secondly, I appreciate that the people commenting our either coming from a place of misguided concern, given we're used to larger bodies, or they are feeling bad about their own weight, which is hardly surprising giving the level of negativity directed towards OW people.
Having also experienced being OW myself, while no comments on weight are acceptable, I'd take so called skinny bashing over fat shaming all day long.

PoePoePoePoePoe · 21/05/2023 18:08

I love that the very first reply perpetuates the ridiculous myth that people don’t comment on fat people only on thin people 🙄. I’ve been both and I can assure you the comments about being fat are much worse and much harder to deal with 😢

CynthiaRothrock · 21/05/2023 18:11

Yup. Sick to the back teeth of it! DHs side of the family are rather large and they are the worst. The last time MIL made a comment (family BBQ i was eating my second burger) she said "oh careful, you might put on half a pound and burst your jeans open". She really disliked my reply of maybe if you swapped your 4ltrs of pop a day for 4ltrs of water, yours might fasten. I was apparently the one in the wrong 🤷‍♀️🤔

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