Despise giving oral

[Anon699]

I don't like giving oral to my SO and haven't in a long time. When I give oral he takes full control and I can hardly breathe because his hands are pushing my head so hard. He will say stuff like "Fucking relax already" or "You're making this hard." He's in general an irritable person but this makes me scared and my throat tenses up which makes him try harder. I can't move my head or he'll get more irritated.

I can't talk to him about it because I did once and he said I needed to get over it and said something like "Well you better train on a dildo then." I haven't bought it up since and we don't have sex other than when he wants head. And he usually guilts me into giving it.

That’s assault OP

You need to leave

You better get training on a dildo!!! Who the fuck speaks or treats their partner like that. Get rid op surely life's to short to put up with this abuse.

The issue isn't that you don't like oral, what you describe isn't 'normal' oral sex, it is a sexual assault (oral rape). Please seek help and support from local domestic abuse charities and/or the police (they can connect you with the right people even if you don't make a complaint against him). This is totally unacceptable behaviour. Sex in all its forms should be enjoyable for both partners.

The PP is making the point that the OP’s issue isn’t that she doesn’t like giving oral, but she is being sexually abused by her partner. What he is doing is violent sexual assault, which he has coerced her into thinking is normal sex. No one is shaming the OP.

Get a nice big dildo and ram it into his mouth whilst holding his head to prevent escape, and see how much he likes being choked. Bastard!

He's not your SO, he's your AO (abusive other). Please rid yourself of this person OP.

This is not a relationship. You need to leave and be with someone who cares a great deal about you.

Eww this isn't giving a BJ this is assault.

Presumably you've told him you don't like it like that and won't do it again if he treats you that way?

LTB he’s sexually abusive.

You deserve better than this.

OK I've just reread your post and seen you don't have any other sex life together - this is it.
You need to end this relationship. What is keeping you together? He is an abuser.

he is a vile man and abusing you. I hope you can find strength to end relationship.

If the only sex you have is, basically, oral rape then I am not surprised you don't enjoy it.

Is he your first relationship?

Oral sex is only as you describe it here in dodgy porn, or in bdsm type relationships.

The main issue is that you are living with an abusive man.

Leave that pig.

This is not what oral sex has to be like.

Again, porn has a lot to answer for...

I really pray that by reading these posts you realise that this is not normal or acceptable. He also clearly watches violent porn. This man is essentially raping your face. This is not what sex is about. The fact you describe him as 'irritable' sends shivers down my spine as I can picture what life for you is like outside of the bedroom too. Pleas leave him.

Sex should be enjoyable for both parties. There's something wrong if he expects you to do something you don't want to do.

Oh for gods sake. Way to miss the point. Of course I'm not shaming the OP. I'm completely on her side. Thanks to @Luredbyapomegranate for spelling it out.

I shuddered reading that Op 🥺
You are being sexually abused.
Sex in any form should be enjoyable for all involved. This “man” (and I use that word in its loosest form) is treating you as nothing more than an object to stick his dick in.
Him speaking to you like that is worrying in itself without the sexual abuse. Tip of the iceberg situation.
Please keep yourself safe OP 🥺🖤

Holy shit, this is not OK :(

And I'd add to what everyone else says, that even though this is not a normal or usual experience of oral sex, it's perfectly OK not to want to give it. It's your body to use as you like, nobody else gets to dictate what you do or do not do sexually.

Geeez if this happened in my marriage I would be off. This is abuse being made to do something your not comfy doing.

He's sexually assaulting you. Leave.

Leave the abusive twat

Woooooah! This is not the thread I thought it was going to be!

I thought you were going to say that your partner was smelly/hairy/took too long or something. Not flipping sexual assault😲I’ve given a lot - a lot - of oral over the years and never experienced what you’ve described. Please please get some RL help to extract yourself from this horrible bastard.

You're not "giving oral." You're being orally raped.

Get out, now.

Is this for real with that user name?

Something wierd about this post.

Reporting.

But you're not giving oral. He's quite literally holding your head in place and forcing you to participate. He's also using coercion to get you to perform in the first place.

He's an abuser with zero respect for you.

Have my first LTB.