Why do woman take cheaters and manipulators back?

[ScorpioTwinkle1]

I'm struggling to understand why woman continue to do this when the man has cheated and lied multiple times and there are no children involved. Why stay?
Surely this sends out the wrong message to these guys? If we all just kicked them to the curb like we should, they might actually learn their lesson

I find it hard to articulate why I stayed. I was with my first DH from 17 to 28. He was same age and he lied, cheated & was abusive. I didn’t know about red flags at 17. I didn’t know the subtleties of abuse. With hindsight it’s all he’d ever known. Equally I didn’t know anyone that divorced. I should never of married him, let alone stayed. But I did.
I was financially independent & no children.
no-one understands the effect that abuse has on your mindset and how it warps your thinking.
I learnt about what i didn’t want in a relationship & it took me many years to accept that I’d been subjected to domestic abuse, mainly because he didn’t use physical violence and at that point in my life that’s all I understood of domestic violence. He did use every other form of abuse.
He didn’t learn by the way. He went onto cheat on multiple women despite telling me he’d had therapy-if of course he did. I wouldn’t believe a single word he said.

To add: anyone who asks the question "why do women take manipulators back" really hasn't done even basic level thinking. You're asking why people do what manipulative people want them to do? Do you know what "manipulative" means?

I'm glad I stumbled upon this thread.

I've just left a 3.5 abusive relationship. Nothing physical but emotionally I am wrecked.

I could see things weren't right and I felt bad at least half of the time but the small good times and the superficial fun times were enough to keep me invested. I don't know why. I'm asking myself this now. I think it's time for me to get professional help but reading these posts are supportive.

Its a consequence of life events that shapes their mind and behaviour. In a very broad sence its a need for the love.

Also, living in an abusive environment has effect of boiling the frog slowly. It kind of happens without you noticing and it becomes your new normal and its very difficult to realise what is going on. And when you do realise, its a shock to start with and then its very hart to actually make the decision to leave, work out the practicalities of doing so and shake your whole life upside down.

Because adaptation to circumstances naturally happens in humans, and many are taught to do the right thing by others before thinking of themselves.