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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Am I in the wrong? :(

32 replies

Enid7 · 28/03/2023 15:51

I didn’t really know where to post, would really appreciate any advice and not sure if I’m in the wrong?
long story short, I do the food shopping every week (online)
I knew I had over ordered some vegetables and didn’t realise also some wraps /
not feeling well today so went for a bath with a headache and sore throat , husband comes storming up shouting and being really condescending about the over ordered food, saying he will sort it from now on and mocking me , it’s making me feel really crap, he said if he did that at work they would all laugh at him, I don’t know I’m probably over reacting, but it won’t go to waste it never does, he is still going on now, :(

OP posts:
BunnyMummy91 · 28/03/2023 15:54

You made a mistake it happens hardly the end of the world! He's way over the top about this! No need for his reaction at all!

Fairislefandango · 28/03/2023 15:55

Your husband sounds like a bully. Let him 'sort it' from now on. Permanently. And make sure you laugh long and hard at him if he ever makes a mistake.

Flojo1979 · 28/03/2023 15:58

Does he usually shout at you?
Totally over reaction from him. Is he worried about money at the moment? Are you struggling financially?

Tangelablue · 28/03/2023 16:01

Is there more to this? Have you bought so much extra that you will not be able to pay the bills now? Does he usually have a go like this? Let him sort the food shop from now on

Shoxfordian · 28/03/2023 16:01

He’s a dick, but let him sort it all out for himself now - don’t put up with anyone talking to you like that

Afreepizza · 28/03/2023 16:02

Both of us have at times over ordered/bought food. We freeze it or give it away. It’s really not a big deal, especially, as you say, it wont go to waste.

Is this how he always reacts to minor situations? How does he react to bigger (real) problems?

Hawkins003 · 28/03/2023 16:04

If it's one or two items as an example, then what's the harm, if it was one or two items that cost $$$I can sorta understand. That said he should be considerate of you being ill, all the best op

Catoo · 28/03/2023 16:06

Sounds like a twat.
I would totally blank and ignore his outburst, or if more appropriate, simply state that he must never ever speak to you like this again and that is the end of the matter. Grey rock style.
Then I would state what is happening next. Example, I am sick and am going to bed for two hours and don’t want to be disturbed.

Take the power back. Unnerve the bastard.

arethereanyleftatall · 28/03/2023 16:11

This is a bit strange op.
Have you over ordered by 100s and money is tight? I can't think what else would explain his reaction. Unless he's a bullying horrible prick.
Anyway, great, he can do it, one less job for you.

Favouritefruits · 28/03/2023 16:38

a few extra vegetables doesn’t seem like the crime of the century, he sounds like a right idiot. Let him do the shopping, save yourself the effort!

isthisright247 · 28/03/2023 16:42

Over the top from him, but was this strategic incompetence on your part? Does he think you've deliberately done it wrong so he will have to do it in the future ?

Dodecaheidyin · 28/03/2023 16:52

he is still going on now

How long has he been going on?

Is this unusual behaviour from him?

You are not overreacting.

Hotvimto3 · 28/03/2023 16:53

Tell him to shut the fuck up, pipe down and check himself. How dare he speak to you like that
Control control control. Hes disgusting

Zola1 · 28/03/2023 16:54

Have you bought enough veg to build him a broccoli house to go and live in?
He's being ridiculous and I hope you know normal people don't behave like this

Hotvimto3 · 28/03/2023 16:54

isthisright247 · 28/03/2023 16:42

Over the top from him, but was this strategic incompetence on your part? Does he think you've deliberately done it wrong so he will have to do it in the future ?

Doubt it. She's female.

callmeblondee · 28/03/2023 16:54

He sounds like a right wanker - my god. What an insufferable oddbod! Who gets mad about something like that, and then says he will be laughed at work for, what, ordering shopping. This world....

Hotvimto3 · 28/03/2023 16:55

arethereanyleftatall · 28/03/2023 16:11

This is a bit strange op.
Have you over ordered by 100s and money is tight? I can't think what else would explain his reaction. Unless he's a bullying horrible prick.
Anyway, great, he can do it, one less job for you.

I.know right. An extra bag of carrots 60p extra spinach £1. Extra wraps 75p. Hes abusive. All can be used/frozen.

ComeTheFuckOnBridgett · 28/03/2023 16:57

You ordered more veg than normal and he went mad? Am I missing something here? He sounds like a dickhead.

BeatriceFranklin · 28/03/2023 17:02

If my DH dared shout at me at all then we’d have a serious issue. Why do people put up with this shit? Tell him to make soup with the extra veg then have a serious chat with him about respect.

caramac04 · 28/03/2023 17:05

Zola1 · 28/03/2023 16:54

Have you bought enough veg to build him a broccoli house to go and live in?
He's being ridiculous and I hope you know normal people don't behave like this

😂😂😂

GreyCarpet · 28/03/2023 17:08

Cool.

Tell him to crack on and he can take over meal planning and cooking from now on.

See how long he lasts. And woe betide him should he make a mistake...

MyriadOfTravels · 28/03/2023 17:10

He realises if it was that much if an issue, he can just bring them back and have a refund right??

He is twat. And a bully.
What is he bringing to your life?

twolilacs · 28/03/2023 17:12

That's pretty horrible of him to have a go at you, especially when he knows you are feeling ill. We all make mistakes, and nobody deserves to be spoken to like that over something so minor.

America12 · 28/03/2023 17:14

If tell him to fuck himself.

RedCarsGoFaster · 28/03/2023 17:14

What's the level of over ordering? My brother and I do a Xmas shop for my parents if we descend on them for Xmas. He added carrots to it one year, thinking it was number of carrots to be picked by the packer (🙄) when in fact it was kilos. So 9 kilos of carrots later, we made a LOT of carrot soup for the family 😂😂

Things can be used up inventively or frozen.

Your husband, however, is an arse. His behaviour is not OK.