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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My husband has lost his job and savings

51 replies

anamelikenoother · 20/03/2023 12:09

My husband's employer hasn't been paying him properly for over a year. It's a small company and they're financially unstable. He's currently three months out of pocket and it's possible he won't recoup any of those losses - it's our entire safety net. He's essentially let his boss take advantage of him for months.
He's been looking for work for months already but isn't having much luck.
We currently live abroad so we might have to move back to the UK and into our VERY small house. We haven't lived there since we had our three kids and there's barely space for two adults. I'm terrified of how we'll cope but we don't have much choice as we can't survive here on my salary alone.
I'm so heartbroken and disappointed. I'm trying to be a supportive wife (his confidence has taken a massive knock) but I'm so incredibly annoyed and I don't know if I can get past this in terms of how I see him. It's like his brain can't function - I'm having to guide him through all of this but I work in a senior role and have huge pressures on me already at the moment.
Please tell me it's possible to regain respect once it's lost - he's a wonderful father and I don't want this to affect my marriage but I'm not sure how to get past this.
Thanks for reading.

OP posts:
OrlandointheWilderness · 18/06/2024 12:19

Whatthefnow · 20/03/2023 20:49

Oh gosh, I feel sorry for him. I can't fathom why you seem to have lost respect for him so quickly. I do understand that you're also stressed but right now he must feel like the weight of the world is on his shoulders and he's to blame.

I'd be pulling together on this one.

Mumsnet is great for venting but you have to be careful not to let the responses make your mind up for you

Best of luck op.

Oh this in spades. You are a team - and at times like this it is really important to realise that means you are there for each other no matter what. He sounds like a good man, he should have your support.

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