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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Cheated on at work

59 replies

Getting2me · 14/03/2023 17:49

I've had a feeling lately that something isnt quite right about my relationship. Dp is at work. He works in furniture, the business also does wallpapers. he also delivers. It's a small business. We were just speaking on the phone. After a short while, there was nothing to talk about so he started speaking about a woman he met before me who he was seeing. It had nothing to do with anything we were talking about. He was delivering a couch to her and she led him to the bedroom and tried to have sex with him. He said he didnt do anything. I asked him how he ended up in her bedroom if he was delivering a couch but he couldnt tell me. It is glaringly obvious now that my feeling was right. I've told him I'm done and ended the call so he whatsapped me with this.

Cheated on at work
OP posts:
NewCarOldCar · 14/03/2023 18:51

Getting2me · 14/03/2023 18:27

I wont post about this again. People can be so horrible

Ignore the stupid posts @Getting2me

But that picture of your texts dont show he has been unfaithful so what other reasons do you have to think that?

IWineAndDontDine · 14/03/2023 18:51

This must be very stressful for you. I'd be inclined to think he wouldn't have told you about it if he had cheated though?

NomadicSpirit · 14/03/2023 18:59

Why the fuck are people so convinced this is made up? It might be, but if it’s not, then your being intentionally cruel to someone who is asking for help and advice. Fucking appalling. As my mum used to say, if you’ve nothing good to say, don’t say anything.

@Getting2me I’d personally be delighted if you’re making this up as this website is just an unending litany of affairs and breakups. I’ll assume you’re not making it up, I’m which case, as others have said, why do you think he’s cheating when currently the only suspicion you have is from something he told you himself. Have you reason to suspect him or this person? I do think it strange though that he wouldn’t explain his presence in the bedroom at first, but was more than happy to later on. That smells a bit.

Anyway, hope you’re doing okay and the previous page of pillocks hasn’t upset you too much.

Monty27 · 14/03/2023 20:18

Maybe it was a sofa bed OP

Throwncrumbs · 14/03/2023 20:22

I have a couch in my bedroom…I don’t know your husband though

TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 14/03/2023 20:34

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TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 14/03/2023 20:36

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Getting2me · 14/03/2023 20:50

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TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 14/03/2023 20:54

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Original poster
Getting2me · 14/03/2023 20:56

You cant read?

OP posts:
Monsterjam · 14/03/2023 20:59

Where / when is the cheating????

TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 14/03/2023 21:02

Getting2me · 14/03/2023 20:56

You cant read?

It's more that you can't write, PP asked you to clarify, & you just started insulting everybody instead of answering their perfectly reasonable questions.

davegrohll · 14/03/2023 21:06

Tbf op you haven't answered if you're in the uk

MsDogLady · 14/03/2023 21:07

@Getting2me, could you please elaborate a bit more about your situation with your Partner?

Do I understand correctly that you are currently in the UK and he is in India? How long have you been geographically separated? Prior to this incident, what red flags have made you feel unsettled?

Suzi888 · 14/03/2023 21:08

Sounds like he’s gaslighting you. You need to change your thoughts? He’s just told you that he’s delivered a sofa and gone to this woman’s bedroom - who he has slept with before?! Now he’s saying it was innocent.

That would be the nail in the coffin for me. He should never have gone to her house.

@TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu 🙄 thread is quite clear to me.

Whooyou · 14/03/2023 21:11

Getting2me · 14/03/2023 18:12

Honestly I'm starting to get angry that people think they know everything

But you did ask. No?

Opaljewel · 14/03/2023 21:33

LMAO what even is this thread? Getting angry with everyone now.

Cheeseandhoney · 14/03/2023 21:46

Well this took a turn.

ok, so he lives in India and delivers furniture, you do not live in India and do not speak any Indian language, he told you some middle aged bloke fantasy version of a 80s porn movie and you’ve dumped him as you feel he had sex with his ex whilst delivering her a sofa.

‘is this correct? I’m not really sure what you’re asking though, or are you just venting ?

barmycatmum · 14/03/2023 21:50

what is WRONG with people?! Are you 12 year olds, taking the piss?? OP is distressed and you nitpick details?
”troll hunting” is against rules of this forum, so GTFO!

god. Sometimes I absolutely loathe people.

OP. I’m so sorry, yes, it sounds like cheating and gaslighting. Are you able to dump him? I would. Life is too short for this garbage.

Agapornis · 14/03/2023 23:47

I'm a bit concerned. This isn't a romance scam gone wrong, right? You've met him in person? Didn't send him money?

There's very little evidence but it sounds like it'd be better for everyone to end it. It doesn't feel like you're enjoying this relationship.

CandyLeBonBon · 14/03/2023 23:50

Well. This thread was not what I was expecting! 😳

CandyLeBonBon · 14/03/2023 23:52

Did anyone shout 'pivot'?

Lana10 · 15/03/2023 05:44

How is it that a hubby and wife can't even talk about these things but actually text each other?

Zanatdy · 15/03/2023 05:52

piedbeauty · 14/03/2023 18:12

I'd dump him for being illiterate.

English isn’t his first language. How many languages do you speak? Why do people come onto these posts and start picking at people’s spelling and grammar? I find it pretty low to criticise someone’s writing when they are speaking a second language (and it was pretty obvious.

OP - I don’t think means he’s gone into her bedroom to have sex with her. Perfectly reasonable if she’s asked about wallpaper etc that he goes in to take a look, price it up. If you don’t trust him that’s a different matter and something you need to address. Or end

tuvamoodyson · 15/03/2023 06:21

CandyLeBonBon · 14/03/2023 23:52

Did anyone shout 'pivot'?

‘To you, to me, to you….’