Please help me with this house selling dilemma

[MissHoneysHappyEnding]

As you might know from my other thread, I am one week + out of my 20 yr relationship with my children's dad.
Before all this; we were moving, had accepted an offer, found somewhere, had the survey completed. I knew it was a complete mistake but kept hoping that he would change, before realising that the thought of him moving into the new house filled me with dread. It was so different to what I felt when we first bought this house.

So I rang the mortgage provider of our current mortgage and asked if I could be the only person on the mortgage. They obviously looked out of kindness but they couldn't approve it due to risk and affordability. I might be ok for affordability once I pay off my credit card and when I get my next pay increment in May.
Our current house is of non standard construction and I'm really scared to lose our buyers as they don't very often sell especially not anywhere near market value for our area.

My options are:
Sell and buy somewhere outright using my part of the equity. This will mean my children moving school which I really really wanted to avoid.
Sell and hang onto the funds and try to buy something at auction.
Don't sell now and stay in the home until remortgage time (august), paying the mortgage myself. My worry is that in l starting a course to retrain in July/August and so my earnings will be drastically reduced. Although much improved in the long run!
Sell and try to still buy a three bed in the area. Ask exp if he will stay on the mortgage, although I will pay it.
Unless there's another option?

If you sold and rented, would that be an option?

Not really as we have pets and rent would be unaffordable for me. I wouldn't get any help as the profit from my house sale would be in my savings account.

Sell and buy outright if you can especially if you won't be accepted for your own mortgage and your wages are about to drop. You can always sell and buy bigger/better area once your wages have gone up again after your course. That would be the most sensible option.

Would your xh be in the school area still? Could the children be with him during the week?

@PermanentTemporary that wouldn't be an option for many reasons. I wish it was

@MamOfFive my worry is that I live in an expensive city and houses might keep rising and I won't be able to afford anything here if I move out now.

Let him have the house? Take the money and fix soewhere else?

Well, you can’t buy the house you were going to.

And you want to sell your current house because a) you’ll both need the equity for deposits and b) you’ve got good buyers at a good price on a tricky to sell house.

So really the question is where can you afford to move to, and where can your ex afford to move to? It’s not a decision you can make in isolation.

How old are your DC? What arrangements have you discussed for them when you divorce?

@declutteringmymind he only has 10% of the equity. Plus he wouldn't be able to afford it on his own.

@NoSquirrels I know, I've made peace with that. I think it's just the difference between a two bed flat and a three bed house in this area isn't actually that much and so I'm sad that there isn't anyway I can keep the mortgage going. I can afford it, it's just on paper I'm too risky.

Don't try to buy at auction - auctions are dominated by professional buyers who will know much more about property than you. Property sold at auction often has hidden downsides - short leases, structural problems etc which may not be obvious.

Well what does your exp want to do? I think that's your only real option then. Could you afford to pay the mortgage + bills with your wages being heavily reduced?

It sounds like you any afford to lose your buyers, you can afford to rent, you can't afford the new place mortgage on your own.

Sounds more of a 'where can you afford to live/buy' question/dilemma, even if that means kids having to move schools. Children can be very adaptable.

*can't, not any

My mortgage is about 300 a month, it's a drop in the ocean compared to other peoples. House prices have gone up so much and there's nothing in my price range in this area for a family of three. I'm not being fussy, I'd be happy with a two bed, no parking etc. I am loathe to move out of the area away from a school they're happy in, support, friends etc, but I think it's my only choice. Plus this city is all I've ever known, I struggle with the idea of moving away, although I like the countyside. I worry that my kids will be grumpy in their teens that I moved them from somewhere with amazing nightlife, good shops, somewhat good public transport to a village.
Kids are 8 and 6, both like their school.

Ask Ex to stay on the mortgage and you pay it. Gives you time to breath. You can re assess your situation in a few months

Yes but come when it's due for a remortgage there's no way it's going to stay at £300 with the mortgage rates can you afford that new rate?

Do you want to leave your current house or not?

It's not clear from your posts why you sold it? You have given a lot of reasons to stay.

If you don't want to leave the area and can't afford a similar sized property by yourself then stay.

@MamOfFive with being a student at the same time, no I probably can't :(
I think part of me just feels hard done by that I'm looking at flats in a worse area which are more than I paid for my three bed semi detached. Obviously house prices change but due to our house being errr, niche, we haven't made as much from it as if it were a regular house in a better location. There's building work planned opposite us too, so that's putting a lot of buyers off. I really don't want to lose our buyers.

Why don’t you stay, then? At 10% equity you can make an arrangement with your DH to buy him out at a different time.

Yes, you’ll have a niche house that doesn’t appreciate in the same way as a different house, but you like it, you want to stay in the area etc. So selling seems like the wrong call right now.

I would sell and talk to a mortgage broker about getting a mortgage based on all of your income including child maintenance, and benefits such as child benefit some will take that into account, would that make it doable?

Oh not good if you can't afford the new mortgage :(
What about areas outside of the city? You could still drive into the city and the kids could use the busses/trains once old enough.

@NoSquirrels I don't think they'll let me stay though on my reduced wage, only one income etc. Plus it's a big house, more to heat etc.

Can you defer your course for a year?

Sell.
Work out what to do from there, but I wouldn't turn away a buyer right now.