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Original poster

Smothering me

68 replies

Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 11:00

An ex of mine assaulted me after months of wanting him to show me love. He was hard to cope with, and ended up showing me how unloved I was.
I stayed single for a year and my friend introduced me to her guy friend. I was unsure whether to give him a chance but I got to know him...he's a sweet person, always showing love and is there for me no matter what. But he's smothering me. Keeps saying he loves over and over each day and saying I'm the beautiful woman in the world(I don't believe it) trying to have sex but he never finishes he's either tired or too hot to go on, he follows me round the house when I'm going to get a break.
Keeps saying I'm going to marry you and that he would move in now if he could (7 months together). And he keeps leaving a mess at the side of his bed and not helping properly with housework when he's off work and I am at work.

I joke with him and say stop being cheesy but he still annoys me. I love him and he's sweet but I can't it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 18:13

Before he put that I'm hard work sometimes but then put he was joking when I told him off

OP posts:
Ghostbuster2639 · 26/02/2023 18:31

Ffs op get rid of this horrible man and take charge of your own life. Never allow this prick into your home ever again.

And tell your friend not to ever encourage a weirdo to bully you into dating him when you don’t want to. What was she thinking.

Oohoohwee · 26/02/2023 18:33

Ghostbuster2639 · 26/02/2023 18:31

Ffs op get rid of this horrible man and take charge of your own life. Never allow this prick into your home ever again.

And tell your friend not to ever encourage a weirdo to bully you into dating him when you don’t want to. What was she thinking.

👆👏👏👏👏👏👏

billy1966 · 26/02/2023 18:34

Dery · 26/02/2023 18:02

“I would echo the comments re you seeking therapy and not dating until your protective shark cage aka boundaries are rebuilt to a much higher standard.

I also think you need to widen your social circle as your current friends are doing you no favours at all, particularly the person who put this walking red flag man onto you. And no, not all men are lazy and childish, that person has picked lazy and or childish men to be in a relationship with. Other people treat us how we think we deserve to be treated.”

This with bells on.

This...and get better friends.

For goodness sake, a friend does give your address to scum

billy1966 · 26/02/2023 18:35

A friend DOESN'T give your address to SCUM.

Beadyeyes80 · 26/02/2023 18:40

This ❤️

Original poster
Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 20:16

He had a feeling I would break up with him. He's saying that he feels alone that he's done everything for me. And now he's saying he's going to break up with me. It's me making him feel unwanted. Apparently he's the one saying nice things to me and I obviously didn't love him ever.
He's on the phone right now. I'm breaking his heart

OP posts:
Original poster
Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 20:17

Yet he's saying do I want him to break up with me ? And if I really want to be with him I need to say so now

OP posts:
DPotter · 26/02/2023 20:39

Just tell him - it's over. Don't contact me again.

Hang up and block across all communication methods. Turn you phone off for the evening and certainly don't pick up / answer any contact from your so-called friend

Then sit down put your feet up and enjoy your singleness and your own company

Alcemeg · 26/02/2023 20:41

Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 20:16

He had a feeling I would break up with him. He's saying that he feels alone that he's done everything for me. And now he's saying he's going to break up with me. It's me making him feel unwanted. Apparently he's the one saying nice things to me and I obviously didn't love him ever.
He's on the phone right now. I'm breaking his heart

Good. Break his heart. The twat.

OhNoNotThatAgain · 26/02/2023 20:45

Alicew00 · 26/02/2023 20:16

He had a feeling I would break up with him. He's saying that he feels alone that he's done everything for me. And now he's saying he's going to break up with me. It's me making him feel unwanted. Apparently he's the one saying nice things to me and I obviously didn't love him ever.
He's on the phone right now. I'm breaking his heart

Wow, he is trying all the tricks in the book to manipulate you.

Don't fall for all that shit.

Agapornis · 26/02/2023 21:34

He's not very good at taking no for an answer, is he? He hasn't done "everything" for you - he's done nothing. Doesn't cook, doesn't clean, doesn't treat you nicely at all. His actions don't match his words. Lock the door and block him.

(And get a cat, they're cheaper, much more fun, keep you warm at night.)

SpacePotato · 26/02/2023 21:45

Yep, here comes the emotional blackmail.

Oohoohwee · 26/02/2023 22:00

SpacePotato · 26/02/2023 21:45

Yep, here comes the emotional blackmail.

💯

bluebeardswife7 · 26/02/2023 22:27

This isn't a relationship you have chosen. It's a relationship that has been thrust upon you. Stand your ground and thrust it back. Maintain your shark cage.

Ghostbuster2639 · 27/02/2023 02:12

Did he talk you round op?

TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 27/02/2023 11:01

bluebeardswife7 · 26/02/2023 22:27

This isn't a relationship you have chosen. It's a relationship that has been thrust upon you. Stand your ground and thrust it back. Maintain your shark cage.

Ha! You've inspired me to post Shark Cage for those who have not read it yet (should be obligatory education in school for teen girls in my book) - also, love the username -

www.jennisspace.com/the-shark-cage-metaphor-spotting-potential-abusers/

billy1966 · 27/02/2023 15:14

TaunterOfWomenInGeneralSaysSayonarastu · 27/02/2023 11:01

Ha! You've inspired me to post Shark Cage for those who have not read it yet (should be obligatory education in school for teen girls in my book) - also, love the username -

www.jennisspace.com/the-shark-cage-metaphor-spotting-potential-abusers/

Show quote history

I printed this out and gave it to my teens to read, they both found it very interesting.

I forwarded it to friends too for their girls.
None had heard of it either.

Many don't grow up knowing this stuff.

Reading it and becoming aware has enormous value.

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