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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

About to leave my boyfriend… quick replies please!

52 replies

Lilally · 13/02/2023 19:00

Hi everyone,
so I’m about to end things with my boyfriend over text. He is absolutely amazing and I know he feels so strongly for me, we’ve not been together long - only 5 months.
The reason I’m ending things is because he never wants children and I do, and it doesn’t seem right at my age (29) to be in a relationship that has no future.
I’m absolutely devastated.
The reason I’m doing it over text is because he’s working away at the moment but is coming to see me tomorrow for Valentine’s Day. As horrible as I feel doing this the day before Valentine’s Day, I know that ultimately it is kinder than having him make the long journey to see me when I need to end things.
Any advice on what to say? And advice to deal with the guilt (I know this will really hurt him), and I don’t know how I will move on from the most perfect guy I’ve ever met (besides not wanting children)

OP posts:
AcrossthePond55 · 13/02/2023 22:51

"I've been giving it a lot of thought lately and having children is extremely important and it's a 'non negotiable' issue to me. Since our lives are not on the same path I think it's time to 'call time' on our relationship. I want you to know that I appreciate your honesty with me on this issue. I wish you nothing but happiness and I hope you find the right woman for you."

supercali77 · 13/02/2023 23:29

Id initiate it by text but let it be a convo that unfolds after you say you've been thinking about the subject. You know how it has to be but it gives him the chance to recognise it himself, ask questions, call if he wants to talk. If he's as decent as you say, an ending that feels gentle and not abrupt is the kind way to let him go

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