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Relationships

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Original poster

What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a partner?

69 replies

misslucy92 · 30/12/2022 20:05

I always thought they were the exact same thing.

are they? why or why not?

Just wondering because in another thread someone said „he’s your boyfriend, not a partner“ and I was like „huh, that’s the same!“.

I personally never liked the term partner. To me it sounds so business-like. A partner can also be a business colleague, a boyfriend is usually someone you’re romantically involved with.

Your thoughts?

OP posts:

yellowsmileyface · 30/12/2022 20:48

I see them as meaning the same thing and the terminology being merely a matter of preference.

Ncgirlseriously · 30/12/2022 20:49

When I was with my ex I used boyfriend and partner (and even fiancé) interchangeably. I’m not too fussy about terms- though I think if someone else said partner I’d be more likely to assume the relationship was longer and they were living together? 🤷‍♀️

ButterflyOil · 30/12/2022 20:52

I’d class partner as someone you are in a marriage type relationship with where you live together / share finances and kids etc. I kind of felt it was used as a shorthand for ‘life partner’ - essentially an alternative to husband or wife where you share your life hut are not actually married.

Boyfriend to me is more a relationship without those elements.

mondaytosunday · 30/12/2022 20:53

Boyfriend I think of someone you are exclusively dating but not living together or committed (like engaged).
A partner can be your spouse or long term committed person, may or may not be living together.

IneedanewTV · 30/12/2022 20:53

My cleaner has a boyfriend. He is 74 and she is 75. I think it sounds sweet.

Sunshineandflipflops · 30/12/2022 20:55

I use the term partner. We don’t live together but spend a lot of time together, go on holiday together with my kids, etc.

we have been together 3.5 years and intend to stay together but I don’t want to get married again and we can’t live together yet. He is more than a boyfriend to me and we are 44/50 so it seems weird to say that. It’s just a word. Boyfriend/girlfriend/partner…who cares.

frylite · 30/12/2022 20:56

I keep trying to post and it won't so apologies if this posts twice.

My partner and I don't live together because of his job.

I'm going to tell him he's downgraded to boyfriend. Keep him on his toes.

Mummawantsanotherbaba · 30/12/2022 20:57

Partner = when you have been together longer then 4 years but someone in the partnership doesn’t want to get married .

My brother and his partner have been together 12 years and have a mortgage and child but he won’t propose. She is too embarrassed to say my boyfriend . So she says ‘my partner ‘. I cringe for her . I wish my brother would propose.

IlonaRN · 30/12/2022 20:58

We've been together for 26 years.
It's a partnership by now.

Bayleaf25 · 30/12/2022 20:58

Partner to me is someone you are fully committed to i.e live together, possibly share car, possibly have kids together, been together more than a few months.

Boyfriend or Girlfriend is someone you see regularly (don’t live together) but your lives aren’t necessarily joined in all areas. Or you’ve been dating a few weeks/months.

I don’t necessarily think it’s weird to call a live in partner a boyfriend or girlfriend but would think it weird to call someone your partner if you’ve only been going out a short while and see each other a couple of times a week.

Holliegee · 30/12/2022 20:59

My partner is 26 years older than me so it’d be weird to call him a boyfriend ….. it’s a long,long time since he’s been a boy 😂

bakewellbride · 30/12/2022 21:00

I'm married now but I'd say when I was dating dh he was my boyfriend. Then we moved in together (rented) - boyfriend still.

Only started using the word partner once we'd bought our own home, set up our finances properly and I got pregnant.

Partner to me suggests big, serious commitment things such as buying a property, joint bank account, together for many years.

WhiskeyStones · 30/12/2022 21:02

misslucy92 · 30/12/2022 20:45

Okay😅

To me a partner is someone you share a business with.

As a romantic term I find it very cold and technical. But I guess that’s just me.

i understand everyone’s different.

If I was talking to someone about my partner and used ‘partner’, why would I need to sound warm and romantic. 😅 To use ‘partner’ or even ‘boyfriend’, it would be to someone I don’t know so why would it matter. To anyone that knows us, I’d use his name.

skyeisthelimit · 30/12/2022 21:03

Partner to me suggests equality, commitment etc.

I went out with someone for a few months, he was a boyfriend not my partner.

I called XH my partner once we were living together (before we were married).

UsingChangeofName · 30/12/2022 21:18

People use the term differently.
For me, I would say boyfriend / girlfriend is when you are 2 individuals who are 'seeing one another' or 'going out' or even 'in a relationship.
I'd say a partner when there is more of a commitment - you move in together, share a rent book or a mortgage, share dc, share finances in some committed way.
But, on here I wouldn't read anything in to the terms, as so many of us have different ways of using the words.

stopringingme · 30/12/2022 21:30

Partner to me is someone you are in business with.

purpledalmation · 31/12/2022 12:18

Partner is the intermediate stage between boyfriend and husband, although many people stick on the partner stage

DuringDuran · 01/01/2023 10:37

Partner = business relationship like partners in a firm.

ShakespearesBlister · 01/01/2023 10:40

When they are your boyfriend you like them. When they become your partner you don't. 😀

Dery · 01/01/2023 10:50

“Partner to me is someone you are fully committed to i.e live together, possibly share car, possibly have kids together, been together more than a few months.

Boyfriend or Girlfriend is someone you see regularly (don’t live together) but your lives aren’t necessarily joined in all areas. Or you’ve been dating a few weeks/months.

This.

WordOfTheDay · 01/01/2023 11:21

In this context, the word partner is short for life partner.

In other contexts, the word partner is short for business partner.

oldtableleg · 01/01/2023 11:27

it's just preference really isn't it?

I had a boyfriend until we bought a house together, then a partner; we got married a few weeks later, so then a husband. I'm completely unromantic though & that works for me - partnership & marriage are both legal/financial arrangements primarily.

I find it stranger when people describe a bloke they've been dating for a month as a partner than when they describe their cohabiting lover & parent of their kids as a boyfriend but it's hardly a big deal.

Zanatdy · 01/01/2023 11:33

I’m 46 and have a boyfriend, not partner. We have only been together 6/7wks, so he’s only really just a boyfriend and not someone I’m dating (exclusive, want to form a long standing relationship). I wouldn’t call him my partner unless we lived together

Windywuss · 01/01/2023 11:33

A partner is a long term committed 'other half' (yuk..hate that phrase too) but you're not married.

OR, ime, it is used by people trying to make themselves sound grown up (if young) and give the relationship some kudos when they've been together five minutes and don't live together. 😁

mumda · 01/01/2023 11:55

Well consider the advice given to people on UC who ask. www.facebook.com/groups/312769902184307/search/?q=nights

You can have someone stay over as much as you like as they do not contribute towards your existence.

So boyfriend might be someone who brings a bottle of wine over once a week, but the partner coughs up for lots of things.

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