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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Ex used to hit me

40 replies

Aly321 · 28/12/2022 19:00

My ex used to hit me. We have dc. Not badly, never left any marks, but he did hit. It was during an argument that he would punch, slap, kick, push or shove. Sometimes he would instead punch walls, punch furniture, throw things, smash his phone, smash through doors, mirrors, walls. Only when he is angry. But he would do it in front of dc. He never thought he needed anger management and would never get it. He blamed me for it. He said no one sees him as an angry man, he is only angry because I make him angry and I bring out this side to him that no one else would see or expect of him. I never used to cause huge arguments, I just used to bring up stuff I’m unhappy with, like him not helping much with kids or disagreeing with him. But apparently it was all my fault that he would act that way.

he would also smash his game controller if he loses as his PlayStation game and told me this is normal for men to do this when they lose at games.

I told my parents about this at the time and they would say don’t make him angry, don’t provoke him, don’t start an argument with him, stay quiet, why are you bringing up things that would cause an argument, he’s your husband so you need to work it out, it’s normal for couples to fight you have to get on with it etc etc.

I have also discussed this with colleagues and they tell me this is abusive and no man should ever hit you.

I’m so confused, I feel my understanding of relationships is so distorted. Note, he is now my ex, but I don’t know if I should have been more tolerant of his behaviour like I was taught to be?

OP posts:
Lovemusic33 · 28/12/2022 19:03

Of course you shouldn’t have been more tolerant. Why should you tip toe around someone in fear of upsetting them? You totally did the right things by leaving him.

YoSofi · 28/12/2022 19:04

No, absolutely not.

None of it was your fault, he is an abuser.

Im sorry your parents weren’t more supportive, Women’s Aid can help you with tools to recover x

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 19:21

He was abusive and horribly so.

You need to sit your kids down and tell them that their fathers violence was never OK. And that it is never OK for someone to scare, intimidate or hit their partner. That you are sorry they had to see that and that if a partner ever treats them that way, they should leave immediately. Immidiately.

Don't get ìnto a new relationship intil you've done the freedom programme and taken the time to learn how to spot abuse. You need to de-brainwash yourself from years of being told its the woman's job to accept and placate violent men. Its not. Women aren't rehab centres.

It's good that you are free. But you still have lots of work to do. For you and to prevent your kids ending up in similar abusive relationships.

Andsoforth · 28/12/2022 19:22

What is your parents’ relationship like?

Aly321 · 28/12/2022 19:26

Andsoforth · 28/12/2022 19:22

What is your parents’ relationship like?

There was DV. But my mum said it’s normal, she said she accepted it and so should I. My dad is a lot better now. But again he says some men act out when they’re angry, they shouldn’t, but it happens and it’s something you can avoid by not provoking it

OP posts:
jannier · 28/12/2022 19:27

He was abusive your parents are nuts even if it a cultural thing hitting etc is never okay marks or not, children seeing violence is never okay, they always say it's you....it isn't......your now am ex best thing you could be move on use support groups etc. And tell your parents they are wrong.....is their relationship like this with mum to scared to speak?

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 19:31

Abuse doesn't come from anger, it comes from them wanting to maintain control. They want you to think that they've been provoked to anger but the truth is they are not abusive because they are angry - they are angry because they are abusive.

It's controlled, deliberate threat and intimidation tactics. Under a guise of anger and losing control in order to make you think that you've somehow provoked it. So that you will spend your life walking on egg shells, doing everything they want, in fear of violence.

The rage is part of the trick. The lie to keep you down.

TheYummyPatler · 28/12/2022 19:34

I bet he never smashed anything up at work when he was annoyed or frustrated

Or hit a colleague. Or someone in the supermarket.

But he hit you and smashed up things at home where he wouldn’t face negative consequences.

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 19:36

Basically, you can't not provoke it. Because they need you to believe you have in order to control you. So they'll find some reason to act angry so that they can throw things and hit you.

Because that scares you and keeps you down. And they enjoy the powerful feeling that brings them. And the fact that you stay, because you constantly doubt yourself and wonder if you caused it. Because that's what they want you to think. They want you to look inwards and blame yourself. So that you don't realise what cunts they really are and leave.

JanglyBeads · 28/12/2022 19:36

How old were your children and how long ago was it?

How are they now?

You need therapy, they (will) need therapy.

Have you ever told a professional what you've posted here?

PatriciaHolm · 28/12/2022 19:38

Your ex and your dad - they hold down jobs? Go to the shops? Go out to dinner, drinks, with friends?

All without hitting and punching people, right?

It's abuse, and they have complete control over it.

Never ever put up with it. It is not "just part" of a relationship.

daretodenim · 28/12/2022 19:39

My dear OP, you are not powerful enough to make someone hit you.

It was never your fault. Not even once.

How often did he hit his colleagues? His boss? I'm betting never? He had total control and chose to do this to you.

It was physical abuse. I'm sorry, your mum couldn't help you. She probably did her best with what she knew, but it was wrong.

Bertha21 · 28/12/2022 19:41

It’s not ok. I walked away from a boyfriend after a close call when his fist came hurtling in my direction. My dad has always taught me men don’t hit women. If they do walk away. It’s not as simple as that though. A lot has to do with how your brought up. Maybe try counselling? To deal with this. However I wasn’t taught about verbal aggression and control and have had major issues with this in relationships.

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 19:42

I hope one day you find yourself on a place where you can say to your mother :

'You are wrong.Violence has no excuse. I did not provoke it from my ex and you do not provoke it from my father. They are both just terrible human beings who everyone should stop making excuses for. I'm sorry you went through this and I hope you one day find the strength to leave your abuser like I did'.

But, until you have come to those conclusions for yourself I would advise you to distance yourself from both your parents. Their relationship is toxic and your mother is still brainwashed. Not healthy for you to leave around.

Anonuser456 · 28/12/2022 19:43

JanglyBeads · 28/12/2022 19:36

How old were your children and how long ago was it?

How are they now?

You need therapy, they (will) need therapy.

Have you ever told a professional what you've posted here?

I have a 2.5 year old who was mainly witness to it. He is fine now. I also have a 2 month old. We split just very recently as he was absolutely useless support being newly postpartum. He was laying in bed all morning having lie ins during his paternity leave whilst I was attending to the kids. And in arguments was throwing things around, smashing, breaking things etc.

I’ve never told a professional. In fact I’ve not really told any one other than my parents and some colleagues

i don’t have therapy, I am still very confused whether the split was appropriate or whether I should try get him back because I’m conditioned into believing it’s not that bad

JanglyBeads · 28/12/2022 19:48

Please please ring Women's Aid tomorrow.

If you contact them or a local domestic violence organisation they will help and support you, with your children. They will understand, and will not push you into anything.

You will be able to change your life. In time, do the Freedom Programme and get counselling and you’ll be able to understand what’s happened in your relationship and how to avoid such men in future.

The Women’s Aid helpline details are at the bottom of the page linked below. Just because Refuge is mentioned doesn’t mean you have to be asking to enter a refuge, they’ll help you work out the best solutions for you.

www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/

Grovescamp15 · 28/12/2022 19:49

It is certainly abusive behaviour and not something you should ever expect to have tolerated. It's awful that the expectation had been put on you to do so and now you are questioning if you did the correct thing by protecting yourself and DC. You definitely did the right thing in making sure he is an ex, for yours and your children's sake. Not only is it painful and damaging for you to be in a relationship where there is DV but it is also incredibly damaging for DC to witness that. You have sent them the correct message that it's not okay to behave like that by ending the relationship, think about what message it would have sent them if you hadn't done that.
As a side note, you were never the reason he was violent and aggressive towards you. He clearly has deep-seated anger issues that will likely never go away unless he seeks professional help and it's not your responsibility to take those issues on as your own just because you are married or have children together. Well done for getting yourself out of that relationship OP, it can't have been easy.

JanglyBeads · 28/12/2022 19:50

Also, witnessing the violence will have had serious effects on your two year old - even on the baby while they were in the womb (they are affected by your hormones and stress).

So you all need help.

But well done for leaving. You may we'll need support not to return though.

JanglyBeads · 28/12/2022 19:51

Abusers don't have anger issues. They seek power and control over their partners.

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 19:53

Well what do you mean 'appropriate' op. Because that's an odd choice. It implies that rather that rather breaking up with someone based on knowing its not a healthy relationship, you're considering what...societal norms? Parental view points?

The only reason you need to split up with someone is that you want to. You don't need to justify it. It doesn't need to be 'appropriate' by other people's mindset.

That being said - children should NEVER be brought up in violent homes. Where their mother has to walk on egg shells to avoid being hit or her things being broken. NO ONE in their right mind would think staying with a man who does this is appropriate.

Your mother is in an abusive relationship and so, not emotionally healthy. She cannot give you healthy advice and her view of what is appropriate is irrelevant.

Even if the relationship was 'not that bad' it also wasn't very good! What's wrong with being single? Surely it's preferable to living with a partner who is shit. Let alone one who is violent!

Worldpeaceandallthat · 28/12/2022 19:54

You did the right thing OP.

No it's not normal.

I watched my dad do this to my mum (as a youngster) and then her next partner was worse. At that point I only saw her on weekends but i still saw it.

Never put up with being hit, shoved anything like that.

It taught me how things should not go. I'd never put up with it myself as an adult.

Stay strong x

Luredbyapomegranate · 28/12/2022 19:56

All hitting is serious and abusive

Your husband was assaulting you and your relationship was abusive

Had you stayed in it, you would have taught your children that violence and abuse is normal, with the result that the abuse could have continued down the generations.

well done for getting out

Ignore your parents. Perhaps they don’t know any better. But if it comes up, be clear they are utterly wrong if it comes up at all.

Luredbyapomegranate · 28/12/2022 19:58

Anonuser456 · 28/12/2022 19:43

I have a 2.5 year old who was mainly witness to it. He is fine now. I also have a 2 month old. We split just very recently as he was absolutely useless support being newly postpartum. He was laying in bed all morning having lie ins during his paternity leave whilst I was attending to the kids. And in arguments was throwing things around, smashing, breaking things etc.

I’ve never told a professional. In fact I’ve not really told any one other than my parents and some colleagues

i don’t have therapy, I am still very confused whether the split was appropriate or whether I should try get him back because I’m conditioned into believing it’s not that bad

Do not even think of taking him back.

Take a look at the freedom programme

Pinkbonbon · 28/12/2022 20:00

YouTube videos about 'narcissist trauma bonding' may help you. May explan why even now you are thinking about taking the beast back.

Myfinalthoughtsonthisissue · 28/12/2022 20:01

If a friend came to you and told you her husband was doing these things, would you tell her she 'shouldn't provoke him'? Probably not...you'd tell her to leave! There's your answer. 😊