It's a long and depressing story but been married for nearly 7 yrs. 2 dc. Today he shouted and screamed in my face, swearing at me while I was holding the baby. My older child witnessed him throwing clothes at me and breaking things. Weirdly though my eldest dc isn't scared of him and still wanted to play with him while my youngest baby was crying so much he fell asleep eventually. Our problems have been going ever since we first got married if I'm being honest. A lot of red flags I ignored and didn't speak up in the first year or two of marriage. Now I do speak up it's constant abuse and shouting.
I just wish I could be brave enough to actually kill myself. Be rid of this bullshit life I'm leading and be away from him and his awful family.
I've had suspicions about him and his mums relationship being very odd. Now he lies about her constantly and treats her like the other woman in a lot of respects. I try to pretend she doesn't exist for my own sanity however do have to play nice when I see her.
The other day SIL came up to me and asked me how I was coping. It all came out well not all but just a skim of the bullshit I I have to endure. His mum said nothing during this conversation even though I admitted to being severely depressed. So everyone is enabling his behaviour basically and he thinks he has done nothing wrong.
I can't go anywhere as my parents home is not big enough for us. Ideally I want him to go.
I've spent the holidays stuck in my bedroom with my baby avoiding him. Hardly eating. Wishing I was dead.