Tinder question to younger women.

[Sandra1984]

Hiya ladies,

I'm a mature woman in my late 40's and have been using Tinder for a week. I state in my profile I'm looking to meet new people, make friends and love would be the icing on the cake". ultimately finding a serious long term relationship is not the goal, I'm really there to meet new people out of my small social circle. I have no bikini pictures, no filters, show no skin on my pics. My profile is overall quite classy.

My question to you ladies in their 20's and 30's is: why do the younger men think it's ok to send me unsolicited naked pictures of their body parts? I don't state in my profile I'm looking for sex or ONS, I don't wish to see some guys naked ass in a message (unless I'm in a in real life relationship with him). For some reason this does not happen with the more older guys (getting unsolicited naked pics), only with young men.

is this a generational thing? is this the norm? (to exchange naked pics with strangers?) Am I out of the loop? Am I dinosaur? is this what the way the younger generation is dating? Am I a prude? Should I just go straight into Match.com and forget this whole Tinder thingy?

feeling a bit lost.

Probably better asking the men why and not younger females.

Because my idea is that mumsnet is read by younger women more than younger men (of course I might be wrong).

I would say because a surprising number of men regard women as essentially interchangeable sex service units.

I'd give it a bit longer, you are currently getting the rounds from the sort of men who flash every woman who appears on a site. It might improve.

I have to say I never went on Tinder. Maybe try Bumble?

Tinder isn’t a dating site to meet someone decent.

it’s a hook up, no strings sex site

How is this happening as there's no photo messaging on Tinder?

Your profile suggests you are looking for hookups.

No one goes on tinder to make friends.

’meeting new people’ suggests you are looking for ONS.

But you can't send photos on tinder can you? So, by then you must have got to the stage where you've exchanged contact details?

It's a way of filtering out literal pricks 😀. They send you a dick pic, you block them.

It is not acceptable and is not a dating tactic, it's just the modern way to flash.

Also, tinder is well known for being the site you go to if you want sexting/ons.
So, regardless of your classy profile, that's what you would be on tinder for.
Use bumble, hinge etc

Hmmm... maybe you're right 🙁

yes, on wassap.

I think Tinder is just the basic site for people who are not super into dating. There's every kind of person on Tinder. You should put No ONS if you are not interested in hookups.

I've never had any of this on Tinder and I'm unsure how it could happen, tbh. There's no way for men to send you pictures.

Maybe pop over to the MN on going dating threads. Maybe people over there can advise what went wrong where. As someone said tinder isn't really for friendships unless you are looking for a friend with benefits situation? Even that you might need to make it more clear.

Unfortunately, from what I see from OLD the naked pics are pretty standard. Why they do it? I expect they get some kind of kick out of it. Or hoping you might reciprocate

MN dating thread

If you genuinely want to meet new people, join a running club or something! Tinder isn’t really the place for it.

I think you're right. I'm going to give Tinder another month and if this dick parade continues I might switch to Hinge or Bumble.

You are giving your number out too quickly.

I don't share my phone number with someone until we've arranged to meet and I know his full name and preferably linkedin.

very good idea.

This. Just don't give your number out. Communicate via Tinder until you actually meet.

@Sandra1984 , if you think about it - the only point of switching from word messaging on tinder, to messaging on WhatsApp, is so that you can include photos. No reason otherwise.

Tinder is geared towards casual sex. A lot of young men are into it (not all obviously). It's why I don't date despite being young. They're often looking for a quickie.

Stop giving your number out so quickly

It’s tinder, a hook up site. You’re exchanging contact details with obviously younger men. That all comes across as wanting a hook up.

They use a scattergun approach with their dick pics because they want to have sex and their pride and joy or insecurity is their cock so get it out of the way, you like what you see? ok let's do it. They see it as time efficient, casting a wide net and managing your expectations or tempting you.

Your Tinder bio is very gullible and too sweet. Tinder is for casual arrangements, FWB, ONS it's not a friendship, let's meet new people to wide my circle app.

I like dick pics, they do you a favour and save your time. It's the arseholes that talk to you for a good while and then suddenly turn sexual... what a waste of my time.