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Original poster

Wondering what DH will buy me for Christmas this year

28 replies

ShushCassandra · 10/12/2022 00:46

In recent years I've had:
Men's socks
Chocolates containing an ingredient he knows I'm allergic to
Nothing because "the shop wasn't open"
A lego set (I've never expressed any interest in Lego)
Nothing because "you're too hard to buy for"

Sigh

Has anyone else had equally memorable gifts?

OP posts:
BoxOfCats · 10/12/2022 00:51

In your shoes I would be dropping lots of hints, and blatantly asking him at least a week out if he had bought me anything.

ErinAndTonic · 10/12/2022 01:00

I'd be off...

Or at the very least no longer buying for him!

laalaaleelee · 10/12/2022 01:01

Can't you just ask for what you want?

InternetRandom · 10/12/2022 01:01

Yes, do you still buy for him? If so I'd stop, and buy yourself something instead. You can always tell him the shop wasn't open.

MariahsBaubles · 10/12/2022 01:08

DH is good at gifting now, but many years ago it was a bit hit and miss. So one year I just told him to go to the white company and buy me literally anything and to spend around £50. He went for it and I received a lovely dressing gown which I still use!
Can you point your DH in the right direction for what you'd like?

toomuchlaundry · 10/12/2022 01:10

Do you do a list? I assume he doesn’t buy for anyone else either

Dies he have any redeeming features?

Pythonese · 10/12/2022 01:14

If I need or want something I’ll just buy it so we exchange token gifts. Christmas is made, not bought.

MinceAndTatties · 10/12/2022 02:47

Given that this is at least 5 years' worth I'd be having the "darling your gifts are shit, let's talk about this" convo.

Good luck!

PinkFrenchie · 10/12/2022 02:58

Just tell him what you want?

Yankeescot · 10/12/2022 03:08

I agree with the others. Tell him specifically what you want. It stinks that only in the movies and adverts that the men come up with perfect gifts for their partners, but that's TV and movies. Most men need clear direction I've found, so just tell him what you'd like. Left to their own devices, you'll end up with something useless and probably expensive. Spoils a Christmas morning surprise as you'll know exactly what you're getting. But hey ho, it's better than receiving some surprise man panties!

allboysherebutme · 10/12/2022 03:24

I send him screenshots and sizes of things you actually want and if he got me nothing he'd be getting nothing, every year and nothing for his birthday either, I'd be fuming, it's disrespectful. X

DrMadelineMaxwell · 10/12/2022 04:22

Dh was a terrible shopper before internet shopping was as easy as it is now.
One memorable (for the wrong reason) Christmas was the one where he had clearly done all his shopping in the one shop....Halfords.

I got a car alarm, some random accessories for the car and a thing to clip to the sun visor thing that held CDs and stuff.
My car didnt have a CD player.

There were nearly tears I was that disappointed. He's much better now.

Shoxfordian · 10/12/2022 05:51

I’d be considering a divorce for Christmas - there’s really no excuse for being so thoughtless

Poppyblush · 10/12/2022 06:59

PLease tell me you buy him ladies sock, your fave chocolates, and a book you like?

Ivyonafence · 10/12/2022 07:02

Incredibly thoughtless.

Is he otherwise a decent partner or is this just one example of many selfish and lazy behaviours?

I'd be buying myself a present on his credit card if he was otherwise a decent partner.

I'd be getting myself a divorce if this is BAU for him.

ImOutOfTouch · 10/12/2022 07:02

ErinAndTonic · 10/12/2022 01:00

I'd be off...

Or at the very least no longer buying for him!

Oh for Christ's sake.

Lkydfju · 10/12/2022 07:16

I send links now and very specific instructions.
An ex boyfriend got me;

  • a foot spa (I was early 20s)
  • a camera that wasn’t as good as the one I already had which he knew about
  • a kindle even though I’d been vocal about loving physical books
  • a present I’d given his mum the year before that had been regifted
Slonce0911 · 10/12/2022 08:10

Nothing....
Every year i got anything he can get last minute. Every year being asked what i want to then ignore and get some other random stuff.
He already asked what i want and I clearly explained, this year only getting gifts for kids. I used to love giving and choosing gifts for others but clearly reached the point when i don't want to do it anymore. My lovely children asked to, and we agreed on a nice lunch out, they can choose the place to suits all, this is my gift and really looking forward to it 😃

daisychain01 · 10/12/2022 08:15

No I don't need to wonder because we ask what each other would like and then we buy it. It's the best way to have a happy Christmas because it takes all the mental gymnastics out of it and removes all the unrealistic expectations that people burden on each other

why do people set each other up to fail. Unless you're under 10, ignore the commercial hype and you'll be a lot happier.

Tuilpmouse · 10/12/2022 08:16

OP. It's not so much that your DH is buying you gifts that you don't particularly like, it's that he's being spectacularly shit about gift buying.... almost like he's trying to be shit. It's thoughtlessness taken to another level and a typical 6 year could do better.

I don't think I could be with someone who treated me with this level of disdain.

Tuilpmouse · 10/12/2022 08:21

daisychain01 · 10/12/2022 08:15

No I don't need to wonder because we ask what each other would like and then we buy it. It's the best way to have a happy Christmas because it takes all the mental gymnastics out of it and removes all the unrealistic expectations that people burden on each other

why do people set each other up to fail. Unless you're under 10, ignore the commercial hype and you'll be a lot happier.

Yep, been doing that for years and so much better.

The odds of a surprise gift being better than one you've actually indicated that you want is tiny....

wintertime9 · 10/12/2022 08:25

We just ask for something each as a main type present and then get some token gifts each, usually something edible.

MintJulia · 10/12/2022 08:25

I'd send him three options with urls, and state very clearly that I'd like one of these, please.

I did that with my ex because he couldn't be bothered to put any thought into it either. He always chose the least expensive, without fail. 🤔

JustAnotherManicNameChange · 10/12/2022 09:07

I give OH a list . He also takes DD out for a day of shopping where she picks stuff,kid has good taste(better than him in fact). Between the two , birthday (very close to Christmas) and Christmas go pretty well.

Weekenders · 10/12/2022 15:25

He's obv not good at/interested in buying presents, so either speak to him or buy your own.

Going through this rigmarole every year isn't helping anyone.

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