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Original poster

Am I overreacting?? Or is this ok??

41 replies

AverageGuy22 · 08/12/2022 23:30

Ok need some outside perspective on this.

Ok so last week my brother came over drop some presents of for our little boy.
I let him in and got him a drink whilst we caught up and watched the football.
my girlfriend at this point was upstairs getting her PJs on and then joined us a few minutes later.
she entered the room, said hello and gave him a hug (nothing usual about that).
We have an ‘L’ shaped sofa and my brother was sat in the corner bit with me and my GF either side of him.
Whilst we were talking my GF stretched her legs out and rested it over on my side but her leg was over my brothers legs (not touching his) but essentially pinning him in when there was plenty of room at her end.
Now I was immediately really uncomfortable and I could tell my brother was so I had to text my GF to get your legs off the guest.

She did but then apologised to not being aware that she put them over him and laughed it off.. again it was awkward.

My point is that it could be suggestive at the most or at the least very awkward and uncomfortable. I said if he wanted to use the loo he’d have to ask her to move her leg.

Believe me I know how Silly this sounds as I’m typing but she thinks I’m over reacting and overthinking it. I don’t think I am as I don’t think it’s too much to ask to respect a visitors private space and not to invade it.
she has many visitors and I personally would never dream of doing that.

Thank you if you made it this far!!!

OP posts:
Tsort · 09/12/2022 00:00

Suggestive? Of what?!

She said she didn’t think and moved her legs. What is it you need from her now?

RandomPerson42 · 09/12/2022 00:02

It was a bit weird of her but not suggestive

Unsureofitall · 09/12/2022 00:04

Sounds like she didn't even mean to do it. Not suggestive at all, if she was unaware especially.

YouTarzan · 09/12/2022 00:06

What the hell?!?

How are people saying this is OK? Sitting with your legs over someone’s lap is something you’d only do with a partner, surely?

Idontwantafuckingusername · 09/12/2022 00:08

You had to text her? She was being inappropriate and she knows it. Anyone saying otherwise is in cloud cuckoo land. If this was a man doing it to a woman they'd be outraged.

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:14

Definitely suggestive/overfamiliar to put your legs over someone.

Sounds like she didn't even mean to do it.

How could she put her legs over someone without meaning to? 😂

RishisProudMum · 09/12/2022 00:15

@YouTarzan and @Idontwantafuckingusername Her legs weren’t in his lap, though. She wasn’t touching him. It’s an L shaped couch and she stretched her legs from one side to the other, so pinning him in, but no physical contact.

Behold, my first MN diagram. It’s clearly awful, but I’ve always wanted to do one 😁

Am I overreacting?? Or is this ok??
RishisProudMum · 09/12/2022 00:16

RishisProudMum · 09/12/2022 00:15

@YouTarzan and @Idontwantafuckingusername Her legs weren’t in his lap, though. She wasn’t touching him. It’s an L shaped couch and she stretched her legs from one side to the other, so pinning him in, but no physical contact.

Behold, my first MN diagram. It’s clearly awful, but I’ve always wanted to do one 😁

OP is blue, brother is red and GF is green. If that helps at all. 😂

CourtneeLuv · 09/12/2022 00:18

Unsureofitall · 09/12/2022 00:04

Sounds like she didn't even mean to do it. Not suggestive at all, if she was unaware especially.

How do you accidentally drape your legs all over a guest, your partners brother, no less?

Disgraceful and embarrassing behaviour.

Unsureofitall · 09/12/2022 00:20

Her legs weren't on top of him though! She wasn't touching him directly.

Aquamarine1029 · 09/12/2022 00:21

For fuck's sake, you don't drape your legs over your partner's brother or any other guest, touching or not. In what world is this considered normal or acceptable?

Fizzadora · 09/12/2022 00:22

How fucking tall is she that she could reach without touching him unless he was curled up in the corner like a little garden gnome? My legs can barely reach the floor on our sofa let alone straddle a corner.

been and done it. · 09/12/2022 00:23

She must have legs like a giraffe

Felicity42 · 09/12/2022 00:23

It's odd unless this is a position she always takes up....

BUT I think she was marking her territory.
The body language is saying that she's jealous of the closeness you two brothers have and she wanted your brother to know that she 'owns' you, and that there's nothing he can do about that.

louderthan · 09/12/2022 00:24

'Get your legs off the guest' made me laugh a lot.
Unhelpful post I know.

RishisProudMum · 09/12/2022 00:25

Fizzadora · 09/12/2022 00:22

How fucking tall is she that she could reach without touching him unless he was curled up in the corner like a little garden gnome? My legs can barely reach the floor on our sofa let alone straddle a corner.

Maybe it depends on the sofa. I can do it quite easily on ours and I’m 5’8”, so tall, but not a giant. It’s my preferred telly watching pose and DH just steps over my legs when he needs to.

I wouldn’t do it in front of guests, but I can see how she’d forget, if it’s her usual pose. Particularly as family doesn’t flip the ‘guest’ switch in everyone’s head.

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:26

I think she was feeling a bit frisky @AverageGuy22

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:27

@RishisProudMum That makes it ok then.

(Great diagram BTW. Grin )

louderthan · 09/12/2022 00:27

Yeah she def wants to bang your bro OP.
But really none of us can tell you what was going on in her head, or if she just wasn't thinking.

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:28

I can see how she’d forget,

There was a person under her. Can't really miss that

RishisProudMum · 09/12/2022 00:29

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:27

@RishisProudMum That makes it ok then.

(Great diagram BTW. Grin )

Thank you! I was feeling very sad I wasn’t getting any diagram appreciation. I can go to bed, now. 😁

SleepingStandingUp · 09/12/2022 00:30

I think it's a bit odd, and perhaps a bit possessive of you. Wouldn't think suggestive as that would be incest unless she was sending you out to empty the bins for 20 minutes.

Do you think she flirts with your brother at other times? It all sounds very formal - a guest visited, I text her to say leave the guest alone etc. Do they not get on?

Crabbi · 09/12/2022 00:34

I am going to report this for anti-giraffe sentiment. It’s an absolute disgrace. But also, where is the giraffe‘s neck in the diagram. I think that’s what we all should be concerned about.

OldFan · 09/12/2022 00:37

Wouldn't think suggestive as that would be incest

@SleepingStandingUp Maybe she fancies both of them. She's not related to the brother so it's not incest as such.

PaperwhiteTheGhost · 09/12/2022 00:38

People saying its fine are weird.

I've known my BIL 10 years. He lives at my mums. I would NEVER sit like that with him!!!