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Original poster

Dh and nights out

33 replies

neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:30

Does anyone's dp/sh actually arrange for them to go out(without children) in the evening without being prompted by us?

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Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:30

dh not sh!

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Merlin · 31/01/2008 20:31

errrr ........ no! I had to prompt mine last week to arrange babysitter, book restaurant etc. We always have a lovely time though so I just think it is a man thing we have to put up with!!!!

Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:33

By the way we're seeing a counsellor for other problems at the mo and one of the things dh has been asked to do to improve things is to "ask me out". We've had a babysitter booked for 2 weeks now, but he still hasn't arrnaged anything! feel like cancelling babysitter & feel sort of tortured by waiting for hi to say something. i keep giving v stroing hints, but nothing happens

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Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:34

lucky you! mine would never even arranage babysitter!

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Merlin · 31/01/2008 20:35

Sorry to hear that NANB.

I agree with you it is very disheartening waiting for something to be arranged. ANd I find it REALLY hard not to drop great big hints!!!

Merlin · 31/01/2008 20:36

It actually feels like i'm nagging him and he HATES that.

BITCAT · 31/01/2008 20:36

Very rare, only if he wants to go cinema. I would rather go clubbing not ready to hang my dancing shoes up yet. Tend to go out with mates instead!!

scanner · 31/01/2008 20:37

Yep, he often rings on the way back from work to say he's spoken to our babysitter and she's coming around later. I am very lucky .

Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:40

wow scanner.lucky you!

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archie72 · 31/01/2008 20:41

My dh must go out at least twice a month till the early hours without me. We have been together for fifteen years. I have decided to stop giving a shit - tonight. He is just home, only an hour after he said he would be. I have been totally cool and he is thrown. Usually I flip but obviously that has not worked in the past. What will happen next I wonder?

Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:42

he just came in to apologise and i said i might as well cancel bsitter. he said it wasn't his fault he'd been ill! he was a bit unwell for a couple of days earlier in the week...babysitter was booked 2 weks ago!

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Original poster
neednewbag · 31/01/2008 20:58

anyone there?

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bseagal · 31/01/2008 21:05

hi, i totally understand all this, dh out at moment, popped home to use phone, as his dad is after him, his dad dont like him drinking, and he has gone back out, he said he was going to be an hour, and has already been out two hours. I do get annoyed but I try to get my own back by going out on my own with my mates, but I always come home early, cos i miss my baby. sad huh?

Smaug · 31/01/2008 21:06

Sorry, not very constructive, but (again!) at him! How hard is it to book a table for dinner FFS?!

bseagal · 31/01/2008 21:08

its obviously too hard as men dont have that part in brain, if i wanna go out with him for night i have to book everything, from taxi, to table, to babysitter, I am sorry my man aint got the romantic bone.

bseagal · 31/01/2008 21:11

how old children? my one only 15 months, and every waking minute i am up i wanna spemd with him, why dont dh think like that???

Original poster
neednewbag · 01/02/2008 09:30

it all blew up last night as i was so upset that he hadn't arranaged anything.he said it as cos he'd been ill (for 2 days) and had been busy at work.... and also that i'd reminded him. he didn't want to book it straight after i'd reminded him as he said then id say that was the only reason he's done it. have aggreed that, i won't remind him and he'll try to do arrnge things more in advance. seems really silly having a row about this, but its something that really bothers me. And yes, how hard it it to book at restaurant??!! I'll still have to book babysitter & taxis

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Anna8888 · 01/02/2008 09:36

Mine , he's forever being invited to dinners and parties by his friends, he's forever wanting to go out to restaurants alone with me.

Original poster
neednewbag · 01/02/2008 09:44

lucky you anna8888. i'm feeling quite envious. it'd be so nice to be "asked out"

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Anna8888 · 01/02/2008 09:51

I hadn't really thought about it but I suppose you are right .

Othersideofthechannel · 01/02/2008 09:59

Yes, and twice he has organised overnight in a hotel.

I usually have to call the babysitter for meals out but he sorted the childcare for the hotel nights.

We don't do the meal out thing that often because of the cost of the babysitter but I do appreciate that it isn't always MY idea when we do.

Original poster
neednewbag · 01/02/2008 13:04

he called earlier on to see how i was and to say he'd boked the restaurant. I said i felt crap and i wondered if he;d have booked it if we hadn't aegied last night.
we'll see if he keeps to what he agreed. he's very good in alot of ways and does loads for ds, gets up in night with him, baths him, lets me lkie in most weekend days. i guess that's more important - but it' be nice to feel he wanted to "go out" with me. if i suggest it , he's always happy to go, but I'D like to be ASKED. is that sowrong?

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Radley · 01/02/2008 13:16

My DH did the other day and I nearly fell off the sofa when he said he'd arranged a babysitter, he hasn't done anything like this all the time we've been together (11 years)

He is now grumbling because I've decided to go and see 'Sweeney Todd' and he isnt that keen

babyinarms · 01/02/2008 14:25

I think i would keel over if DH arranged a night out, I do all the organising but thats how its always been, so I dont really mind...now does that make me sound sad!!

Original poster
neednewbag · 01/02/2008 15:16

no, doesn't make you sound sad at all. I know we all fall into our "roles" in relationships. Our roles are fine by me - we both do alot. i'd just like to feel he'd make the efort for us to spend time with me alone, rather than just going along with it when i arrnange it. Is that unreasonable?

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