I’ve been with my husband for 8 years and me and the wife of one of his brothers have never really got along or been close. The expectation is there for us to be a foursome and always be together but I just couldn’t be like that with her due to the way she would treat me. I’ve tried my best over the past year and we were all spending a lot more time together. Unfortunately the issue’s are still there and I can’t continue to be spoken to badly. It’s all so negative, picking issues with me, making little comments all the time. So I haven’t seen them for a while.
The thing is… do I just leave it and keep avoiding them or do I tell them? I don’t want to cause any issues with the family though. If I thought they would change then I might try to sort it out. I’ve known them both for 8 years and I know they will disagree with my view. My BIL has always been a bit odd with me, picks at me and makes comments but I can’t tell if it’s because the wife doesn’t like me or if it’s both of them. I’m not the first person to fall out with her or my BIL. They have done this to other people in the family and everyone knows what she’s like. My BIL always takes her side and they have both fallen out with other people. The difference with us is my husband and BIL are really close, they own a business together.
I physically cannot stand this woman and really have tried to be friendly with her over the years. Nothing I do, no amount of effort I make is good enough. She does intimidate me a bit and I have not actually raised this issue with her as I don’t want there to be a big argument. It’s ridiculous, I know my husband will back me up this time but she’s got away with it for so long as no one else in the family has stood up to her apart from the couple of people she’s had an issue with. Immediately my BIL took her side and each time, and one of the times it was the other brother and the other time it was the cousins wife. I don’t want another repeat and feel bad for my husband. I know they will say I’ve broken the family up. We all know it’s her that is the issue but they don’t see it like that.
My husband and I don’t have children yet but want to try soon. This worries me as I don’t want to bring a child into this drama. I don’t know how to handle this situation when I know they won’t change their ways. I knew she had an issue with me from the start, it seems to be with other women in the family, like she is jealous or feels threatened by other women, but she has also fallen out with the other brother too, so who even knows.