How would you word this?

[AFunnyFeeling]

I'll keep this brief...ish

Had a first date last weekend, seemed to go very well. This was following a couple of weeks of daily messaging beforehand.
Next day, lovely messages etc, really complimentary, how much he enjoyed it and wanted to meet again. I then instigated messages for next couple of days. Since then, radio silence. Not heard from him in almost a week now as I'm not going to instigate contact every time.

Clearly he's not feeling it. But I'm tired of hanging on to hear the inevitable. How do I word a message to him acknowledging said "not feeling it" whilst maintaining my dignity?? Just think he's being quite rude tbh

(Trying to give a feeling that I'm not bothered, but actually I am 😔)

I’d not even contact, just blank him?

How awful of him, I personally would not message. If he doesn't have the communication skills to end things you've dodged a bullet

I don't think I'd bother tbh, just delete his number

I wouldn't bother either.

Don't message him at all. That's how you retain dignity. Next!

Urgh, I can't stand not having my say though 😂

The strange thing is, I gave him a lift to the train station, and he accidentally left something quite valuable in my car. He knows I have it and after I offered to post it to him, he said "oh don't worry, gives me an excuse to see you again" wtf??

I wouldn't approach him again and if he contacts you about the item, just hand it over on your doorstep.

You are having the last word. You have his item and he will have to instigate contact to get it back. Bide your time.

so what if he left it in your car? Oh well. He can either contact you and ask for it back or live without it

it can’t have been That valuable if he left it in the car of someone he’s playing games with

I would probably text something along the lines of, "guess you aren't wanting to keep in touch, not to worry but you could have just said that! Not here to waste anyone's time, least of all, my own! Take care.'
He will inevitably reply that you're lovely and he's just been flat out at work/possibly something to do with family... his way of keeping you on the long finger for sometime in the future!
At this point- delete, block, forget.. don't let him keep you as an option.
Good luck an let us know how it goes!

Don't text anything. Nothing. If it helps, write it down on a piece of paper, put it in a drawer. I guarantee you in a week you will be glad you didn't say anything.

I personally wouldn't contact him. I'd actually block him and letting him worry about how he is getting his 'valuable' back is your way of having the final 'word', if that's really what you feel like you need.
No matter how you word any message, it is almost certainly only going to come across as needy/bitter/angry etc. After one date, is it really worth losing your dignity over?

You're all so right!

Just to add a bit of detail, he actually lives quite far away and comes back to my home town (his birth town too) to visit family. He said he'd be coming back in about 3 weeks time so he could get his thing then.
Got a feeling he was thinking of keeping me as a convenience for when he's back, if you catch my drift.

I know it's only been one date and it's silly, but we'd really built up a rapport over the phone etc and the date went so well. I just feel like a dick for getting sucked in really.

But I won't message him. As much as I want to tell him he's rude.
Thank you all 😘

you don’t need to tell him he’s rude
he already knows he is being a dick

Nope. He's not worth a second more.

Thank you all. I had a wobble earlier and nearly messaged him. I'll sit on my hands now though

I WOULD get in touch with him otherwise he might think you’re keeping [valuable thing] on purpose.

I’d say “Hey, have you forgotten I’ve got [valuable thing] that you left in my car? Get in touch to arrange collection when you’re next visiting family”.

If he doesn’t get in touch then hand it in to Police lost property – tell them you found it in the street or something – and then one final message to let him know that’s what you’ve done.

You don't need to be the indefinite keeper of his [valuable thing] so be proactive in getting shut of it.

When I first asked about sending the item back, he said straight away what date he'd be back again, so I know when he's back, but it's just been silence since then?...

He's knows you have it. He knows your number. He hasn't been in touch except to say when he'll be home again. If you know where his family live, I'd drop off whatever it is there. Is it something that can be posted through a letter box? If you allow him to pop round to pick it up on his next visit, you're in danger of becoming something/one he does on home visits.

In that case, wait until after the date he's back and if you've still not heard anything take it to Police lost property and let him know that's what you've done.

...it's not his phone is it and that's why he's not been in touch?

He might have left it behind on purpose to give him a reason to visit even though he intends to make zero effort talking to you between now and then as you’re not in the right town for sex.
So I second the police station option.

Do not contact him. The valuable item obviously is not so valuable to him. Unless it’s irreplaceable I’d drop it into lost property at the police station and if he contacts you got it, let him know where he can find it.

You have dodged a bullet with this time waster. Stay silent and do not get in contact. Retain your dignity and you will be so glad you did!

Expect him to ramp up the conversation and lots of excuses as to why he’s not been in touch just before he’s due back to visit your town.

That's what's pissing me off! That he's thinking he'll just get his end away when he comes back with no effort in-between...

Fwiw the item was an expensive watch. It is genuine as I coincidentally know a bit about watches.