Would you see someone again after this?

[StaranoidAndroid]

4 good dates, we were discussing him coming to mine but couldn’t as much flatmates are all in and due to the tenancy, I need to clear guests with them first. Guy jokingly said “aw are you sure, promise I’ll be a quiet boy”. I felt sick! Am I overreacting?

I think I’d have gotten the ick at that last bit too, so no, I don’t think so.😂

Eew. Gross.

Creepy and cheeky.

Presumably discussing going back to yours after four dates meant sex was possibly on the cards?

It's a bit cringe but in the grand scheme of things I wouldn't say it's fatal.

4 good dates? And you had good conversations, and click otherwise?
Not sure why you are making big deal about his joke?
You we’re clearly thinking of getting closer with him. So you want him to want you.
Why then get offended when he hinted he did - in joking way.

Doesn't sound like the worst thing ever.

Have ye been kissing and clearly longing to go further, if so, then I think it's a reasonable, jokey thing to say.

Dont see why someone would get worked up over it...

I couldn't get upset about it....what specifically about it has made you not want to see him again?

I'd be mocking him and getting rid.

Ewww quiet 'boy'? sorry, I don't date children.

It would seriously give me the ick if a man referred to himself as a 'good boy' etc. bleughhhh.

Can't get worked up about that, unless he did it in a baby voice

“4 good dates? And you had good conversations, and click otherwise?
Not sure why you are making big deal about his joke?
You we’re clearly thinking of getting closer with him. So you want him to want you.
Why then get offended when he hinted he did - in joking way.”

This.

It's not really something I'd end a relationship over...

It's not that I'd get worked up or offended at someone showing an interest in sex after 4 dates that would put me off

It's the phrasing that would personally give me the ick 🤢

Using babyish language and hinting at sex....yuck!!!

Bit creepy.

Seems an overreaction to me.

This.

Massive overreaction. Don't throw away a promising relationship on the strength of a few silly words

What's wrong with this? Jokey. But if you liked him enough you wouldn't be bothered about it.

I wouldn't even have assumed he meant sex. Just that he would be quiet so not to disturb the flatmates/draw attention. People really do find anything to get upset over.

What made you feel sick?

The fact he's hinting at sex or the language he used?

Most men are at least thinking about it after 4 dates.
You said he jokingly made the comment so I wouldn't think twice about it tbh, if he'd said it in a dead serious way then yeah I'd agree with you.

Honestly, are there not real issues you could get uptight about in a date? Is this really the worst thing in the world a potential suitor can say to a woman these days? No wonder there's so many career spinsters on here. Maybe just don't date full stop if you can't get past something this traumatic.

It just sounds like it was just a bit of a shit joke to me but if it's put you off then you're well within your rights to stop seeing him obviously.

How old is he?
It could make all the difference tbh.

He’ll be replaying that in his mind nightly I’m sure.. “why the fooooook did I say that?!” 😂

We’ve all been there.. I’d use humour and take the piss out of him for it, it’s cringey but funny and absolutely a perfect opportunity for piss taking.