I won't block but can't respond

[Feeloverit]

I just can't respond to this person and they haven't done anything wrong.

We known each other years but reconnected while ago think during lock down but I caught feelings. They use to be chasing me. It's long to explain but I can't respond to them. Normally I would but just can't.

Am I bad? Should I just say I'm okay.

I won't block them either just need a bit of space as I am a bit all over the place.

I am kind of moving past them feeling focusing on what really matters.

You don’t need to reply today, but ghosting people who don’t deserve it is twatty.

You can tell him/her what you told us. Your mind is all over and you will get back when you are feeling better.
Its better than being silent

@Violettaa @MMmomDD

I was going to respond and then next thing accidentally pressed the video call. So switched phone off.

Then I did a message unsent it.

I heard someone I knew passed away and I know it's bad. I said just heard someone I know passed away need to sort my head out.

He responded with OK.

I can't talk to him at the moment tbh a lot come up various things and I'm trying to get past catching feelings or getting close to him an becoming attached.

I just need distance for a bit.

Hopefully it will pass and either we keep in touch from time to time or we don't. I need to move forward..

I think you should just block them it’s a bit mean what your doing.

It's all a bit cloak and dagger, isn't it.

Your confusion is palpable.

You're confused? I'm confused. Not a clue what's going on! Just block him. He won't know.

Take a deep breath and keep things simple. By simple I mean not dramatic. Just dial.it back calmly. Respond when they text after a few hours or so. No vague messages just reply or say that you are a bit busy and will text back in a bit.

@Hugocat1

I probably should but not for reasons your thinking.

I think blocking childish and done the block unblock before with him.

Just need to sort myself out I be okay.

We haven't spoken for such a long time. I don't want to ignore that's why responded.

@Dillydollydingdong

I won't even though I should maybe.

I just need move past something be back to the way I was.

@Feeloverit

@youlightupmyday

I will talk to him but it's complicated to go into.

I just posted on this Forum yesterday because my partner told me he is going through a hard Time and needs Time and has stopped replying to me for almost a week now (2 weeks of this situation in total, but not replying at all for almost one week). I am surprised to see your post Where I can get some kind of perspective from the other side's point of View. I don't know you and I don't know what you are going through and I am sure there is a valid reason for you to do this, but I can give you some perspective from my side. Ghosting someone is horrible. It affects them terribly. Especially people you love and who trust you. You risk to lose them even if you come back. It's going to be difficult for them to trust you again.
And to all the people who are saying to just "block" the person.. that's horrible too. What is wrong with people?? Don't you think of how the other person might feel seeing that they're being ghosted or even blocked without having done anything to deserve it? Just get some courage and explain the situation to the other person. That's the minimum you can do.

@Ocea

Not ghosting him at all.

We both have our situations

The reason why I can't talk to him is I got attached to him and we are friends.
I need to move past my expectations of him. But he will always be there asking how I am.

If you’re friends, but you have deeper feelings for him that aren’t returned, then yeah the friendship can’t continue. I get it. So either be honest with him (so embarrassing but that doesn’t matter if you’re dropping contact anyway) or just reply to his messages very slowly with a thumbs up or something and then after a few weeks of that just stop replying.

Unrequited love.

@Pineappleflowers

I just had a little conversation with him which kind of embarrassed myself saying how I accidentally called him but could not stop the call so switched phone off lol. He laughed and then conversation dried up.

I am slowly getting over it but not quite there. We just use to talk all the time but now we don't I do miss that.

This has gone on far too long now. Had the what are we talk made a right fool of myself. He must of backed off because he was giving me mixed signals. Like I said it's my problem so need to sort it out.

That sounds so hard OP. If you’re both single, straight,and became very close, talking all of the time, then it’s completely natural that you developed feelings and they you expected something more. You didn’t make a fool of yourself, you tried to take things to a natural next step. If he’s aware of how you feel and doesn’t want a relationship then I find it quite odd (and rather selfish of him) to keep reaching out contacting you. It does sound as if part of him enjoys the attention/admiration. 🤔

Your feelings for him will die much quicker when you’re not in contact with him anymore, as I’m sure you know!

Good luck xxx

@Pineappleflowers

It's more complicated we both have our situations.

When we reconnected thought let me get to know him properly he put straight in the friends zone. I didn't even think of him like that because he always been the one to be chasing me. It's really long to go into.

We use to talk every day but as I got to know him properly I got attached I think. He was flirting and with the what are we talk he said we are friends and had a grin saying he just flirts but it's nothing. Think we both did but stuff he say make me think he was still after me.

Then he backed off after that conversation what are we talk. Which we did face to face and he say we just friends.
But I held back I had caught feelings kind of threw it on him. Then I backed off stopped contacting him. I found it hard we just spoke all the time but said this needs to stop.
If I don't message for weeks he will always message to see how I am doing.
He not going to save me probably watch too many romantic movies lol.
I keep saying we friends I got stupidly attached what I feel isn't love.
This why I was like I couldn't reply just getting over whatever this was with us.
After we spoke yesterday I just want to keep talking to him. Whatever his plan was it worked he drew me in.
I know probably it's best I walk away from him or just sort my head out.
Or I need space but I really don't know what I want from him as it doesn't feel like a friendship but doesn't feel more than friendship either. Just too much here.

Update

I am not against him we have spoken via social media.
I think I can't rely on him to rescue me he always says he there for me.
I have been depending on him and expecting more and more. Really don't why that is.
Yesterday I just wanted to tell him my good news and even talk to him. But then thought it's like best I let him be.
He got his own life and so do I.
It's not that he won't know he will but just not now.
Thanks all for advice

If either of you are in another relationship my advice is to just cease all contact. You don’t need an explanation for this. He shouldn’t be flirting with you or chasing you.

@HannaHanna

Whatever it was with us it's fizzled out and feel like we really don't have anything else to say.

We both have our situations. So why was he so interested in my sex life with DP. That's what put me on edge. He say would say stuff like of I was upset has he cheated on you. I saw you with him but couldn't say hi.

If we friends then why didn't he introduce me to his DW. We spoke about our families but for some reason I got closer to him developed some attachment.

We met a couple of times just talked but he gave some good advice.

He has changed I suppose in the sense he backed off and it's my problem. My hope is we eventually won't talk maybe once in awhile.

I missed the boat years ago and now we both unavailable. He totally gets me payed such detail to everything about me. I couldn't believe how much I suppose no other guy been than way.

He’s really not a good person and not your friend. You have to be strong and completely block him and avoid. He wants your attention and will destroy your life without noticing.

@HannaHanna

This why I questioned what are we. Don't feel like he a friend or more either. Think he did want to sleep with me even though he said no we friends..I refused him in the past and found out he lied about his situation had cut him off. Then before lockdown don't know why I thought let me just get to know him. Back in them days we met I was a messed up told him that. He said to me I wasn't. I most definitely was and he almost got me.
I don't know why I let him back in my life and then I began to like him a bit more than I should maybe it was just attachment liked our conversation who knows. I feel a right fool.
I just hope we eventually just drift so far apart we never talk.

I just hope we eventually just drift so far apart we never talk.

Why do you think you have no control over this? If I don’t want to talk to someone, I just don’t talk to them.