Lonely Aussie Mum in Clapham

[Justine888]

Hi, we moved here in April 2007. I am a SAHM with a son in school and a daughter at home with me. I am yet to find a friend - not even the Mums at school are friendly - cliquey. Im getting desterate and depressed about it all. Any tips/advice would be appreciated or if you know any friendly Aussie Mums out there in the same position, let me know. PLEEEEASE!

hello. have you signed up to mumsnet local? there are a few people in the area. whereabouts in clapham do you live? which school is ds at? how old are the dc? i'm sorry you are feeling a bit miserable. i bet mumsnet can sort you out!

Mumsnet Local Lambeth hope this works.

Hi Aussie mum, just saying hi. I hope you find a friendly mum soon. I found the local playgroups/clubs/dance classes all quite good for the social life.

Hi Justine888. I'm not an Aussie but I have a good friend near here who is, she has 2 school age boys and a new baby about to be born. I am in Balham, and go through Clapham Old Town on my way to school every morning. Where in Clapham are you? Happy to meet for coffee one morning if you like. Sorry you're feeling a bit miserable - it's hard sometimes being at home with small ones, let alone in a new country.

London Mums can be cliquey, but find the right group, and you'll find some nice ones! Have you tried Caterpillar Music or Monkey Music?

Keep bumping, someone who is nice, near you and maybe even antipodean is bound to be along in a minute!

sorry meant to say i am nearby and will be a sahm for a while from next week - hurrah! could well be up for a coffee one day. am not aussie

Thanks everyone for the quick response.
I have joined up with the local Wandsworth and Lambeth MN sites. I live near Clapham Junction (off Northcote Rd). I dont have a car but I have two legs and a pram/buggy that Im happy to use to meet up.
I havent joined any organised groups for kids like Caterpillar Music or Monkey Music. Ive never even heard of them till just now. What are they and where are they?

nice area

have a wander down northcote road and go into probably any of the cafes or children's shops. have a look inside for noticeboards, cards etc. i guarantee there will be ads for toddler singing, gym, yoga etc etc you name it. you know they call northcote rd nappy valley? tbh i'm not surprised at all that you're finding some of the mums cliquey - it's yummy mummy central. but don't worry there will be some nice people as well.

Hello, I am in Balham too but I will reply to your local thread...

here you go Monkey Music Clapham & Battersea

How old is your dd, Justine? Ds2 who is 2 1/2 is at nursery not far from N'cote Road - we could meet you one day for lunch - any excuse to go to lovely N'Cote shops! Also, the Northcote Road Library does story time a couple of times a week which are free - if you look on the Wandsworth website www.wandsworth.gov.uk and click on libraries, they will give you the phone number and you can check the days/times.

How come you moved to England?

Hi Justine - I'm in Wandsworth but work full-time, although I'll be on Mat leave from August if you're up for meet ups then.

There are 11 one o'clock clubs in Wandsworth so go along to some of those, I'm sure you'll meet some lovely people. Also my friend says a lot of the mums (she's at home on a Friday) go for lunch in the Brasserie on Bellvue Road, v. child friendly by all accounts, so might be worth a few trips down there?

Thanks. Will do. I have seen those adverts around but never paid too much attention cos Ive just assumed that I would at least click with someone once my son started at school. I was even assured by his class teacher that I wouldnt be lonely for long once school kicked off. GARBAGE!
This is all very weird for me. Ive never had trouble finding or making friends before. Everyone at school and even in the parks seem so insular and shut off. Just smiling or saying hello seems off limits over here. Yes, there are plenty of wealthy and cliquey women in this area - the class system is alive and well on Northcote Rd. I had heard the Nappy Valley nickname but I assumed being women and at-home, there would be some common ground there but ...... anyway,
If you are around this week or next and fancy a catch-up, I'd love some adult female conversation. My 14 month old daughter isnt quite there yet. Maybe we could meet in the middle? I can walk or bus it or train it? let me know.
Thanks again.
Justine888

Tin Pan Annie and Annie's Action Kids are other popular activities

Lots of people seem to meet their NCT group when pg and then never move beyond it (I'm a bit guilty of this)

There is a nice playgroup on Thurs afternoon at St Lukes on Ramsden

also, i recommend joining the pta at your son's school. usually that is a great way to meet people.

What about next Tuesday? It's easy for me to come your way as I will be in the car anyway as I am running errands before picking ds2 up from nursery. I will CAT you.

Just tried to CAT you, but you've chosen the no emails option. You can email me at vix5868 at hotmail dot com.

bossykate, you're right. I have the next PTA meeting ear marked on the calendar to do just that. Im gonna through myself at their mercy....
Wilbur, I have no idea what CAT is and I didnt know I'd chosen the NO EMAILS option. Im new to this site and am fumbling my way around. I will check out my account and see if I can fix that.
Thanks. I will email you in the meantime.

Also, when I lived around there, I think that my Health Visitor gave me a big leaflet on all the activities there are. I never went, but I did hear that the one o'clock club on Wandsworth Common was good (but I know how terrifying these places are when you know no-one) - and your health visitor will definately know the details of this.

Also, as well as Monkey and Caterpillar there is BuggyFit, when lots of mums and babies in their buggies meet on Wandsworth Common or Battersea Park and walk, talk and do a bit of a work out. I found this much less cliquey than other things I went to. I'll find the link.

buggyfit is here

And Caterpillar Music is here

Sorry I don't live there anymore otherwise I'd love a coffee!

The other side of the common there are a few Mum and Toddler groups which are friendly and sociable. Just a big room full of toys and the Mums sit round having cups of tea and chatting. Costs £2. One is on Wednesday morning 10am till 12 at St. Johns Church, Clapham Road, just by Clapham North tube. The other is Thursday 9:30am till 11:30 at St. Paul's church hall on Rectory Grove in Clapham Old Town. There are a few Aussies that go to them. London Mums are not as openly friendly as Aussies unfortunately- I love Aussies (I'm not one, but I am friendly!). Just come along; it's very casual. And cheap!

They are in Churches but are nothing to do with religion just in case that put you off. Church halls are just a cheap big space to rent out so often they are used for play groups. If I saw a new person there I'd chat to them so might see you soon!!

Hi peasoup
The playgroups sound good. The only trouble is I have a little girl who needs to sleep at 10 am - smack bang at the start of those groups.
Does anyone know when babies go from two sleeps a day to one? My daughter still has a morning nap 10-11.30am and then another hour or so at 3.30pm? Bring on the one nap a day!