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Original poster

How many real friends do you have?

66 replies

thatrodofyoursisinsane · 26/09/2022 14:31

By real I mean known a long time, long enough to trust them with your children for instance. The kind you know would be there for you when needed like family would. Ones who have and would unquestioningly support you. A true friend, not an acquaintance. You get the drift, right?

How many of these do you have and how old are you?

You don't have to see them all the time, but I think we can all agree on a "true"/"real" friend?

I'm just curious. I feel very fortunate with how many I have, I'm just curious on whether I'm extremely fortunate or just normal, as it were.

OP posts:
Desmondo2021 · 26/09/2022 19:24

Probably about 10 who i could call at silly o clock, would leave my kids with etc. I'm very lucky to have a wide, amazing social circle and within that environment I think it's only natural that really close friendships develop.

twoandcooplease · 26/09/2022 21:25

1 and she's amazing. If I only ever have one friend I'm happy it's her

MrsTimRiggins · 26/09/2022 21:31

Without meaning to sound like a twat, I’ve got, relatively speaking, a lot of friends but the true, trust with anything and everything, know everything about each other, could (and do!) just pop in anytime type friends, I’ve four.
One I met in reception class, day one, inseparable since, two joined us in year 7, same tutor group at secondary school, and one was maybe year 9, when we had English together. We’re thick as thieves to this day, we’re nearly thirty now.

Twinklelittlestar65 · 26/09/2022 21:40

Mid 30s - I have a lovely lots of circles of friends that I'm enjoy their company but in terms of drop everything and drive 100 miles to be there for you no matter what and look after the kids without question:

Probbaly about 7 or 8

1 from NCt only known 3 years but have connected with so strongly who i can honestly say i feel abke to talk to her the most openly and trust with my child.

I have 3 girlfriends from school so known about 20 years now, I'd trust with my child and currently all being here for me during the hardest year of my life so fat

2 from uni known 10 years - a year ago i would have said 3 (hoped it was) but unfortunately 1 uni friend hasn't been there for me and friendship has waned despite being a bridemaid at my wedding only a few years ago which makes me sad.

2 male friend too from college years, one I see more than the other but know both would drop everything and I feel comfortable talking to them about everything and anything.

I feel very lucky to have the strong friendships I have though and hope they continue through my life ❤️

RudsyFarmer · 26/09/2022 21:41

Probably none with that criteria. But I do have lots of people who I’m very friendly with and would trust my children with but mine is ring in the middle of the night or expect to drop everything to save me in an emergency.

BackToWhereItAllBegan · 26/09/2022 21:43

I'm an expat and have moved countries many times. Everywhere I've lived, I've made very good friends but then one of us moves on to another country and we don't maintain the friendship for very long.
I've been settled in my current country for 10 years now and I have 4 very close girlfriends that I've known almost that whole time. One in particular is in our will to be the guardian of my DS if something happened to DH and myself,
I feel incredibly lucky to have these friendships and regret not making more of an effort to maintain past relationships.

VivienneDelacroix · 26/09/2022 21:45

Two very close friends. Three others I am close enough to, a further four who I meet up with occasionally, and three very good friends at work.

DoodlePug · 26/09/2022 21:50

Lots of loose friends, some of whom I've known a very long time who would happily help me out with anything and meet for a coffee with relatively little notice.

But real friends maybe only 2, and they both have MH issues so despite considering me one of their best friends I could not rely on them in anything other than the most major emergency.

Feel quite sad now.

But DH has always been my best friend.

VerifiedBot2351 · 26/09/2022 21:57

None.

Notahappychick · 26/09/2022 22:05

Honestly? No one I could ring at 3am if I had an emergency.
Have a couple of friends who are good in that I can tell/ discuss anything with but it always seems as if meeting up has to be convenient to them, not as often as I’d like, sometimes goes months without seeing them.
I keep my circle small now as had too many let downs in the past, ppl will only be friendly as long as you are useful to them I have sadly found.

IncessantNameChanger · 26/09/2022 22:07
  1. But only one lives close atm. 40s
Girliefriendlikespuppies · 26/09/2022 22:08

I'm still very close to my two best friends from school, am lucky that they live locally and we have remained good friends.

I have a friend from college who I'm very close to, she recently got married and her and her dh chose one person each to be their witnesses. I was her person 🥰 I consider her the sister I never had.

I have several other good friends but don't get to see them as much as I'd like these days.

I'm 43yo.

BlueBellsArePretty · 26/09/2022 22:15

Just one

Ineedwinenow · 26/09/2022 22:22

2 best friends who know everything about me and vice versa and are my go to body burying friends should I ever need help and a further 5 who are close but wouldn’t bury the body with me but would give me an alibi…

joking apart though all 7 are lovely people and I’d be lost without their help, friendship and guidance! Best friends are friends of 22 years ( met at the same time) and the other 5 are between 3-6 years of friendship

hope this helps

MolkosTeenageAngst · 26/09/2022 22:25

Probably 6 or 7 absolute true friends who I know I could call up at 2am and would trust with just about anything and who have supported me through difficult times and who I know I’ll still be friends with in 40 years. Have known most since late teens, coming up 20 years.

TinaTeaspoons · 26/09/2022 22:30

Don't want to boast but well into double figures. I know that makes me very lucky. I'm in my thirties.

Designerenvy · 26/09/2022 22:35

I didn’t maintain contact with school friends. I never really had a friend group growing up. I was friendly to everyone but never felt part of a group. It didn’t bother me at the time but I do wonder why it didn’t bother me now ?
I feel very blessed now. I have 3 very close friends. One I’ve known since childhood, the other 2 I’ve known for 30 years! We don’t live in each other’s pockets because we don’t live close to each other but I know they are there and it’s fantastic when we do get to actually meet up.
I have another 2 friends, probably friends about 8 years. They live local and we socialise a bit together, go for walks etc and I could call them in an emergency definitely if I needed them and visa versa.
I have a few more friends, 5 to be exact , that I meet occasionally for coffee but we’re not overly close but we enjoy a catch up every now and then.
I feel very blessed to have so many friends in my life.
My most precious ones are the 30 year old friendship and childhood one.

teaandtoastwithmarmite · 26/09/2022 22:45

About 8. Not in the same group. My friendships are mainly one to one. I'm 41

Bearsan · 26/09/2022 22:54

Real friends inner circle -5 plus sil and sis.
Many others that I socialise with but they are on a completely different level.

Bearsan · 26/09/2022 22:54

I'm 54

Hooveslikejagger · 26/09/2022 22:57

4 ride or die, would trust with my life, can tell anything to, through thick and thin, help bury the body kind of friends. Known them decades. They are my friends for life. I keep my close friends close and the circle small, quality over quantity. They are very strong friendships and I feel very fortunate they are in my life. Long may they continue.

2/3 more who I’ve known for some years, and they may become lifers, but I am a bit of a slow burn on who I let in very closely.

Outside of those I have many loose/casual friends, but they don’t know me like my 4 closest friends.

RoachTheHorse · 27/09/2022 05:36

One I have been friends with since I was 4, so 40 years. One from the nursery days, so 10 years. One from when we were neighbours, 12 years. One from my hobby, about 7 years. Then one newer friend from the school where we've moved to so less than 2 years. I also have a uni friend of 20 years but she lives in another country now so we stay in touch but she can't help with kids in a pinch etc.

Some I live close to and see regularly, others we just message and call a lot. Others we make an effort to meet but life makes it hard. Any of them would be there if I needed them and it was possible. Any of them I could rely on for help. Few of them know each other well though, it's not a group of friends. They are all the people I've picked out over the years to be important parts of my life.

Londonnight · 27/09/2022 05:51

None

CongratulationsBeautiful · 27/09/2022 06:05

About 5. I'm 45. None of them live nearby at the moment (hopefully that's about to change!) but they are long standing true friends that it's always wonderful to see and I know I could call on anytime.

I often see these friend threads on Mumsnet and know I am lucky, but I've also worked hard to make and maintain friends - it doesn't just happen.

Circleoflife2057 · 27/09/2022 06:17

None :( only acquaintances I might have coffee with once in a blue moon.
But we do have friends of DHs he's known since school but it's not quite the same as your own friends.