Been seeing a guy for the best part of a year now. It was casual, both agreed we weren't looking for anything serious. I have 2 kids and not really keen to introduce them to anyone.
Last night he completely blindsided me and told me he wants more and that he's fallen for me. It was totally unexpected and I just laughed in his face and told him I have no interest in a future with him. I was brutal!
But actually, I feel the same. I've just locked my feelings away and kept up the act so well I've actually convinced myself, I just don't care. I've tried to call, no answer. I've text and apologised and asked if we can talk, no answer. Not surprising really, I was a complete cow.
After a day of reflection I'm just scared, scared of my children being hurt. My marriage with their dad failed because their dad struggled with our eldest (now diagnosed with autism). He an absolutely wonderful, charming, beautiful boy but he's rigidity, routines and meltdowns can be tiresome. I had a gentle parenting approach and he was a do as I say or else kind of parent, I got tired of the tension in the house and wanted my son to have a home where he was accepted for who he is, on his worst days and the best. But if his own dad can't love him how can a complete stranger?
No idea of the point of this, just needed to splurge!
He isn't responding to me so I can't do anything about it, and if he did, would I even want to pursue anything more than a casual fling, it's not fair to my sons to introduce them to someone who could well just up and leave when things get tough.