Ex threatening to do something stupid (triggering)

[itchyearhole]

Just had a message from ex telling me he's going to commit suicide, I've no idea where he is but I can't leave the house. We've been broken up about 2 months now and haven't been speaking as he's he's blocked in all means. Must have bought himself a new SIM card to message me as number unknown.

My ex used to do this all the time, whiny alcohol fuelled crying and saying he was going to jump off a bridge or a car park . I got so fed up I told him to get in the bloody car and I’d drive him there. Strangely he didn’t want to go then.
Him getting a new Sim shows it’s planned to get your attention. You’ve done all you can, none of this is on you. I’d block all unknown numbers and get on with your life.

Don't bother changing your number, just start blocking withheld/unknown numbers. Used to do that years ago with a rogue landlord- at the time there was a lovely app for this called Mr. Number.

My exH used to do this. He was and is a selfish bastard.

When our daughter was in an adolescent MH unit, he posted a cryptic 'suicide note' on his FB, knowing she would see it along with everyone else. He had split up with his girlfriend (sensible woman), and wanted attention. He posted the note, left it up for about two hours, then deactivated his account. My DD tried to hang herself that afternoon. I'll never know if she saw that post from him, but I absolutely believe she did, and it triggered her into trying to end her own life again.

If any man ever tried to manipulate me by threatening suicide like that, I am afraid I would tell them to get on with it and then block them. Fuck wasting police time on welfare calls.

It's almost certainly an attention seeking exercise. As a general rule the ones who really mean to take their own lives don't broadcast it. The one person I know that made a genuine attempt didn't tell anyone and it's only luck that they didn't succeed.

A family members ex threatened to do this and they are still here years later.

Sorry I haven't read the thread, but if you know where he is contact the police and let them deal with it and consider it job done. Call his bluff and don't directly respond to him.

tell him to crack on with it then and block his number

Don't reply. Just forward his message to local police and say you are being harassed with threats of self harm.

This simply isn't true and is a dangerous myth. I have worked in mental health and people often disclose when they feel genuinely suicidal. This is not helpful.

www.samaritans.org/scotland/how-we-can-help/if-youre-worried-about-someone-else/myths-about-suicide/

So he's still alive but in a serious condition in hospital - his housemate found him half dead. Hopefully he'll get the help he needs from the crisis team as there's nothing I can do. I have my DC to think about. I know that sounds heartless but it's really been a long slog to leave him. Him pulling this has reinforced the reasons for leaving. Thank you for your input everyone. I've had about 45 minutes sleep so am exhausted.

People, men in particular, do do "petty suicide" as a last act of control. It does happen. But it is never anyone else's fault. Whatever happens to your ex is on him.

Take care of yourself and the kids op.

Take care of yourself and your kids, OP. You've done the right thing here but he's not your responsibility. Consider changing your contact details so he can't load this stress onto you again in the future.