Worried my ex isn't over me...

[doorboot]

We broke up two years ago ,well we never were really a couple (both women)
She wanted more and at the time I didn't want commitment.
Anyway we are both at a wedding on Sunday and I'm worried that she won't be over me and the messages might start again.
I've heard through mutual friends she now has a new girlfriend of over a year ...I'm just worried seeing me might start it all up again for her.

Would you skip the wedding ? Just to save the awkwardness /possible embarrassment?

When did the messages stop? Why do you think she's still interested if she's had a gf for a year?

Unless there's a back story of her messaging obsessively and still.contacting you now, I think you're overthinking.

She stopped messaging me around 15 months ago but before that she was sending quite a few asking for explanations etc (which I ignored but she still messaged asking for explanations)
I told her I had met someone new and she sent a sarcastic message saying "hope she's got a good therapist) around 15 months ago and that was last I heard.

I'm just worried seeing me might bring back her need for explanations etc

It depends how bothered you are about going to the wedding and what you actually think she's going to do. If she's seriously going to start harassing you or put you in danger, then no don't attend. If it's just something you can easily ignore, then attend

I blocked her on WhatsApp
Then she messaged on messenger -and we did speak for a couple of weeks then I told her I had met someone new (so 15 months)

From my perspective when I bump into an ex I usually think 'what the hell was I ever doing with them...'

I think you'll be ok given she has bothered you for a long time

Is she going with her new partner? If so I doubt she will want to show herself up.

I think you'll be fine to just smile and nod politely.

She's with someone else now. I'm sure she's got over how you treated her.

It sounds like she's well and truly moved on, so it would seem an over-reaction to not attend a wedding because she'll be there.

It sounds like you screwed her up a little and she's well over you.

I'm sure the sight of you won't bring her to her knees if she's moved on.

I don’t think you really have any reason to believe she will start messaging you again. Especially if it’s been 15 month and she is in a new relationship.

Good grief, the woman hasn't contacted you for more than a year and is in a new relationship.

I think you have a skewed idea of your own importance, to be honest.

Erm.....trust me, she's over you.

This reads as if you actually want her to still want you, which means you're the one not over her and not vice versa. Either you're trying to create drama because you enjoy it, or you're trying to think of a legitimate excuse to not attend the wedding.

Regardless, you're being weird. Stoppit. No contact for 15 months - she's very much over you. Are you over her though....? Hmmm.

I got over my ex pretty quick but for ages after he told people we worked with he was worried about me and that I'd never get over him because "to woodsparrow what we had was so special"

I don't think you need to worry

I think you need to get over yourself to be honest.

When I read it's been 15 months since you were in contact and she has a new partner of a year, that was my first thought as well

I really don't have a big idea of myself or anything
I just know how intense she was with the texts at the end
She sent around 8 texts (all ignored ) asking why I treated her a certain way and it was too much.
So obviously that's why I wonder if seeing me might stir up her feelings for me again because they clearly were strong.

Nah it sounds like you just ended the relationship in a shit way and didn't give her any closure.

15 months ago and she has a girlfriend of a year? Yeah she is totally over you OP and bizarre that you think seeing you will suddenly change that.

Why did you ignore her texts asking you to explain? Why didn't you just explain?

I think you are overestimating your importance in this woman's life.

Or because you just ditched with no explanation and she was confused? 8 messages whilst annoying isn't that bad.

We were never officially together.
A reply from me would of only made her ask more questions.
I didn't want any friendship like she did ,I just wanted no more contact at all
She wanted reasons that was it

I think you need to get over yourself. I'm sure she has realised by now that she's probably better off without you.

I just didn't want any uncomfortable situations for any of us.