Seriously, you need to leave him.
It is of course perfectly natural and normal to support, care for worry about our loved ones. We do all we can to help them when they need us, and vice versa. That's a 'normal' relationship.
Of course that works both ways. Or it should. In your case, you are being abused, insulted, criticised, made the scapegoat for a man who won't take responsibility for his own health needs. He could seek professional help. He could seek counselling. He could apologise to you, even after the event. But his actions, and the things he says (and doesn't say) show that he doesn't think he owes you the compassion, care, understanding and love that you are showing him. He isn't willing to put in the effort to help get himself better and to stop abusing you.
You feel obliged to stay 'because I'm his wife'. As his wife, would you treat him as he's treating you? Would you suffer an illness and refuse to seek help and lash out at him and make him miserable and never apoligise?? Why are you holding yourself against higher standards than him? Do you think if someone is married they should stick around forever, even if their partner is abusive, controlling, selfish, manipulative, cruel?? Yes you made promises when you married, but so did he. He is the one who isn't treating you with love and support. He is the one who is being cruel and selfish. He isn't acting like a loving husband, yet both of you seem to expect you to always be the loving wife.
You've stuck around so far, and it hasn't helped him get better. He isn't making any efforts to. So you can assume that if you stick around abother 40 years he won't get better. He could well get worse. In the meantime you will be a shadow of your former self and will wonder where all the years have gone.
Or you could leave and have a happy life. It might even shock him in to taking steps to do something to help himself.
Yes it is awful if he had a bad childhood, and if he doesn't have a supportive family. That's sad and I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I feel for him. But he is now abusing you. He could choose to get help and be a kind and loving husband, then you'd want to stick around. If he refuse to get help then he is choosing to wreck your marriage, not you.