Do you see how saying you let her back into your heart is you placing the impetus/responsibility for saving the relationship onto her instead of taking responsibility for your own actions that ruined the relationship?
Your ex has no responsibility/obligation whatsoever to solve your issues.
Your ex also has no responsibility/obligation to forgive/accept your mistakes and try again.
The effort getting therapy was for you is nothing to do with her at all - what of her efforts to understand your fuck up? Do you give her any understanding at all for that?
If the original break up was solely, by your own admission, your doing, I see no reason at all why you would insinuate that she needed to do anything different to make you let her back into your heart.
If you can’t see the difference then she is absolutely right to not continue.
If you can see the difference, then why would you use that wording and place blame on her for your mistakes?
And saying how much work you undertook to understand what/why you did something so hurtful to someone you professed to love means fuck all if you then get pissed they won’t carry on as normal because you've decided they should.
You hurt her, and you’re pissed she’s hurt instead of her playing pretend that it’s all ok.
That’s messed up enough to warrant additional therapy on your part.
(and because you need that therapy, not because she doesn’t want to put up with you blaming her for your issues)