Fuck my life

[megapints]

Feeling really down. I've had a really rough ride over the last few six years, husband walked out which actually turned out to be a blessing in disguise although it didn't feel like it at the time. Got into a relationship with an old friend a couple of years later, was really happy and then he died, very suddenly and my life fell apart. Took three years to rebuild myself... last week a dear friend confessed he had feelings for me (i've fancied him for a while) and invited me for a night away this week in a nice hotel, no pressure but just to get away from things if I wanted and a date. I can never afford to go away so this was really nice that he booked a hotel and said not to worry it was all on him.

I was really excited, arranged for my teenager to stay at her dads for the night. Got my nails and hair done. I even told other friends that I have a date. We are supposed to go tomorrow and he's just messaged me and said he can't go anymore, he's realised he still has feelings for his ex and it would be wrong to go. He's offered me the hotel room for nothing but I literally have no-one to go with and going alone would feel too sad. I feel broken and humiliated so I can't even talk to anyone about it. I haven't even replied as I just don't know what to say. I was so looking forward to this. I was fine before all this but it's just made me feel more alone than I have for a long time. Fuck. My. Life. Not sure what I want from this post but just needed to vent my sadness.

I would send him a message and say thanks but the original point has been lost and to ring you if he changes his mind. You have had a rough time, many do. Kick yourself up the backside knowing you have a right to feel awful but feel good- go for a walk, get a bottle of wine when you can. Believe in yourself - others have similar problems and yours is absolutely not the worst. There are still white knights disguised as normal folk, so mix and find another one.
I shall wish you all the luck in the world and maybe it might help a bit !

I love solo travel and I wouldn't want to go to a hotel alone in these circumstances. What's the point? I think it's only going to amplify feelings of loneliness. You need to be in a good mental place to really enjoy eating/drinking alone at a hotel.

I'd just enjoy a night at home, with all my home comforts. Get something good on Netflix, tub of Ben and Jerrys, some popcorn, or maybe a Chinese takeaway. Maybe a nice bath with candles and music before bed, face mask, then a nice lie in in the morning. Out for a nice walk to a cafe if there's one nearby, pick up a cappuccino and a nice pastry and maybe get a Sunday paper and read it and all the supplements while lounging at home.

Screw that guy.

Agree, text him back and say I am not fussed to use it but Sophie is pissed as she’d planned a night alone with her boyfriend, lol, any issues if she uses it instead?

I would send him a message and say thanks but the original point has been lost and to ring you if he changes his mind

please don’t ask him to ring you if he changes his mind. It’s proper desperate.

Ring the hotel, say there's been illness. Ask if you could transfer the booking to another night. Then, take your daughter and have a pampering time. Otherwise, go on your own, get drunk, be waited on.

I'd give it to your elder daughter and boyfriend

I'd still go. Pack a good book, bottle of wine and some treats. Enjoy yourself.

I would send him a message and say thanks but the original point has been lost and to ring you if he changes his mind.

Do not, under any circumstances do this! Might as well get ‘Doormat’ tattooed on your forehead. (I cannot imagine what the poster who suggested that was thinking.)

Give the hotel room to your DD and her boyfriend.

DO NOT ask him to call you if he changes his mind - that is so sad and desperate.

I personally think you’ve had a lucky escape. Your “friend” summoned you to a hotel for a random shag, all on his terms. You say you liked him, and you’ve been through a lot over the last few years. It feels like he’s taking advantage, and would have just used you for a night of sex. Yuck

I was just about to post the same thing.

going alone would just emphasize what happened and exacerbate the pain I was feeling about what he and I would have been doing. I’d rather be at home and nope for a day or two around the comforts of home.