Page 3 | Deflated piles/skin tags affecting sex life

AnonymousAli · 2022-05-28T09:24:53+00:00

Hoping to be reassured this is something other people suffer with! I am early thirties and have suffered with mild constipation throughout my life, not something that causes any pain, but I just generally don’t “go” very often. As a result of this I have had external haemorrhoids a few times. Each time obviously stretching the skin around my bum and then deflating, but leaving the horrible bits of skin left. Not necessarily a skin tag as they usually have a little narrow stalk at the base, there’s no way I could tie a bit of cotton around these!!😂I never feel clean after going to the loo as there’s so many crevices!! Maybe 3 blueberry sized bits of skin around my bum. I am single and this really affects my confidence as it’s not something talked about very often. The thought of men seeing them and being horrified really makes me never want to go near anyone ever again. I believe this isn’t something covered on NHS as it is deemed cosmetic. Anyone else?!

Bibonelove · 07/09/2022 01:28

Ive had 2 since the birth of my youngest whos now 16, i dont think anything will shrink them, id love to get rid of them too 😕

Pinkbonbon · 07/09/2022 09:56

I didn't even find anusol helped active piles tbh. A warm shower is the best thing. The second they start to play up. As for left over tags I think surgery is probably your only option.

Pinkpeony2 · 07/09/2022 10:09

AnonymousAli · 07/09/2022 00:30

Back on here as still having bum anxiety. Does anusol help shrink the skin left over after piles at all? Even a little bit? Or just the actual active piles!!!

Get a hydrocortisone ointment on prescription. Nothing you can buy over the counter does much.
I find a proper hydrocortisone does shrink them although they may come back once you stop the cream.

MrsTag · 07/09/2022 10:18

I had surgery for this privately ( was refused on the NHS) and it was fine and not agony - was given some very strong painkillers. It was all very neat initially but has started to distort a bit now and yes I get the issues with wiping. Glad I got it done though.The problem is that the skin seems to - how can i say it ? affect the closing of your bum after a poo hence the difficult wiping.I alternate between a haemorrhoid cream and a barrier cream.

Original poster

AnonymousAli · 07/09/2022 12:06

The 1% hydrocortisone?
Surgery not an option financially at the moment but maybe one day … 😭

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Original poster

AnonymousAli · 07/09/2022 12:08

MrsTag · 07/09/2022 10:18

I had surgery for this privately ( was refused on the NHS) and it was fine and not agony - was given some very strong painkillers. It was all very neat initially but has started to distort a bit now and yes I get the issues with wiping. Glad I got it done though.The problem is that the skin seems to - how can i say it ? affect the closing of your bum after a poo hence the difficult wiping.I alternate between a haemorrhoid cream and a barrier cream.

Oh no! Surgery not even a magic fix then 😭

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grey12 · 07/09/2022 12:13

You could try to get a douche (??? Don't know the name.....) to clean yourself with water after using the toilet. It's amazing!!!! The only downside is how dirty you feel when you have to use a bathroom without it available 😣

Satsumaonaplate · 07/09/2022 12:56

I have these too, so annoying. But I dont let it get me down!!! And my husband doesn't care 🤷 we just don't do anal ...

VMor · 07/09/2022 22:13

I had two of these. I bought a little elastic band thing for skin tags. After an hour or so of trying, I finally managed to get one on. Once it was on, I added another band over the first one. It hurt so much for two days then, after a week, it fell off leaving a raw bit of skin. It healed after a couple of days.

I'm going to do the other one I have soon. It's bigger so I'm a bit worried but I want it gone.

choochooandspook · 07/09/2022 22:20

polkadotpixie · 28/05/2022 12:45

I wouldn't rule out this being done on the NHS, I think it must vary by trust as I work in colorectal surgery and we do anal skin tags all the time, on the NHS

yep i had mine done on the nhs just before covid, go and see your doctor

Darbs76 · 07/09/2022 22:42

Don’t want to scare anyone but complications following this surgery killed my FIL. Major infection which I’m sure is very rare, but it was heartbreaking that such a minor op caused this.

Original poster

AnonymousAli · 09/09/2022 15:01

VMor · 07/09/2022 22:13

I had two of these. I bought a little elastic band thing for skin tags. After an hour or so of trying, I finally managed to get one on. Once it was on, I added another band over the first one. It hurt so much for two days then, after a week, it fell off leaving a raw bit of skin. It healed after a couple of days.

I'm going to do the other one I have soon. It's bigger so I'm a bit worried but I want it gone.

They don’t have like a stalk at the bottom like a true skin tag. I fear trying to band anything would result in incontinence or something!!

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VMor · 10/09/2022 20:21

AnonymousAli · 09/09/2022 15:01

They don’t have like a stalk at the bottom like a true skin tag. I fear trying to band anything would result in incontinence or something!!

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Mine didn't have a stalk either. It was more like a deflated pea. Why do you think it'd make you incontinent?

AgnestaVipers · 10/09/2022 20:23

littlejellyfish · 28/05/2022 11:54

Fairly sure it won’t be remotely visible during sex

Well, that really depends...

Original poster

AnonymousAli · 10/09/2022 21:53

VMor · 10/09/2022 20:21

Mine didn't have a stalk either. It was more like a deflated pea. Why do you think it'd make you incontinent?

Show quote history

Oh mine are way bigger than a pea 😂 and quite fleshy. So worried any at home banding would cause some serious damage haha

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Blsp · 10/09/2022 22:03

I have a sentinal pile. Grew over a fissure, so not actually a pile. Had it since i was 20/21. Now 34 and been incredibly self conscious all that time, until i met a new partner a year ago and i just told him. I feel so self conscious about my bumhole, this is why. He looked at me like i was mad and said he'd seen more women's bumholes with lumps and bumps on than not.

Several years ago I'd gone to the doctor because mine can swell and itch if i have an upset tummy and i was wondering if that was enough to consider getting it removed on NHS. She prescribed steroid cream but it hasn't done much. She said i could go private but in reality she doesn't think the risk of infection is worth it, and given my skin is clearly prone to healing with a lump, there's no saying it won't just heal with a lump again.

The key to me was being honest and talking about it and it almost immediately became a total non-issue.

crystalize · 11/09/2022 01:00

I put up with something like this for about 11 years. Mine happened due to pregnancy. First referral to hospital was told it was cosmetic (years ago). Then around 4 years ago I researched a private surgeon based at an NHS hospital, booked an appointment, cost me £120 for consultation and he said it could be done on NHS. I had the skin tags removed and a vein stitched inside. The first poo after was bloody painful but after that I could cope. Healing takes a while but it was so worth it, I have a normal bum now! Just make sure you prep beforehand and take the stool softeners they give you. Try some probiotics if you're struggling to go regularly.

Flyinggeesei234 · 11/09/2022 10:26

OP could you look into getting them removed privately?

For those saying partners don’t know about them or that they’re not visible during sex, I’m just baffled - how?! Are you doing it in the pitch dark?

Original poster

AnonymousAli · 15/09/2022 15:25

Blsp · 10/09/2022 22:03

I have a sentinal pile. Grew over a fissure, so not actually a pile. Had it since i was 20/21. Now 34 and been incredibly self conscious all that time, until i met a new partner a year ago and i just told him. I feel so self conscious about my bumhole, this is why. He looked at me like i was mad and said he'd seen more women's bumholes with lumps and bumps on than not.

Several years ago I'd gone to the doctor because mine can swell and itch if i have an upset tummy and i was wondering if that was enough to consider getting it removed on NHS. She prescribed steroid cream but it hasn't done much. She said i could go private but in reality she doesn't think the risk of infection is worth it, and given my skin is clearly prone to healing with a lump, there's no saying it won't just heal with a lump again.

The key to me was being honest and talking about it and it almost immediately became a total non-issue.

Thanks for that. I’m sure making it a non-issue from the get go is the way forward!
I can generally cope with it if I wasn’t getting intimate. I should probably care less about what men think - I wouldn’t care if they had the same problem…

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Original poster

AnonymousAli · 15/09/2022 15:27

Flyinggeesei234 · 11/09/2022 10:26

OP could you look into getting them removed privately?

For those saying partners don’t know about them or that they’re not visible during sex, I’m just baffled - how?! Are you doing it in the pitch dark?

I have done! Though can’t find anywhere in my area so would have to travel. It seems it will cost thousands. And I haven’t had any children yet so I will be mortified if they came back after paying that!

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Original poster

AnonymousAli · 15/09/2022 15:29

crystalize · 11/09/2022 01:00

I put up with something like this for about 11 years. Mine happened due to pregnancy. First referral to hospital was told it was cosmetic (years ago). Then around 4 years ago I researched a private surgeon based at an NHS hospital, booked an appointment, cost me £120 for consultation and he said it could be done on NHS. I had the skin tags removed and a vein stitched inside. The first poo after was bloody painful but after that I could cope. Healing takes a while but it was so worth it, I have a normal bum now! Just make sure you prep beforehand and take the stool softeners they give you. Try some probiotics if you're struggling to go regularly.

Thanks for your message. Wow how lucky! That’s amazing. I’m having a hard time searching for private surgeons in my area, I should look closer into it

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Iamuhtredsonofuhtred · 15/09/2022 15:47

After my kids I had skin tags, paid £750 for removal on Harley St, it won’t cost thousands, that would be of they still were active haemmorhoids. Skin tags are a much easier procedure. Took minutes, almost painless and left my asshole looking perfect

UmbrellaLegs · 15/09/2022 15:54

I had skin tags done by Nuffield recently and it was approx 2000 pounds for day care, anaesthetist, surgeon etc.

Original poster

AnonymousAli · 15/09/2022 18:05

Iamuhtredsonofuhtred · 15/09/2022 15:47

After my kids I had skin tags, paid £750 for removal on Harley St, it won’t cost thousands, that would be of they still were active haemmorhoids. Skin tags are a much easier procedure. Took minutes, almost painless and left my asshole looking perfect

They are definitely leftover skin from haemorrhoids, but not thin and floppy like a proper tag. They still have a bit of “bulge” to them if you know what I mean. So possibly more complicated ! No pain or anything from them. Just an ugly inconvenience

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Snoozer11 · 15/09/2022 19:23

I have this and would love to have it removed, although mine sounds smaller than yours.

I had a doctor take a look at it once and she said she would not recommend getting t removed, as it'll leave scar tissue which doesn't stretch. And obviously you need that part of your body to stretch.

Sometimes I wonder about getting a second opinion.