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Original poster

Hinge question

39 replies

YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 18:51

New to the dating scene (after a long, sexless marriage) but have a question about the dating site Hinge...

If someone likes a pic or something and I sent a reply saying thanks will they get it if I'm not a paying account holder? I've sent thanks messages that say sent but don't seem to get read. Just wondered if it's because I haven't paid.

I'm paying for Bumble and Match (getting nowhere). If anyone can recommend a site that still allows messages for free then let me know.

Thanks (a lonely, but attractive, 50 year old female). Sad

OP posts:
WeWantTheFinestWines · 15/05/2022 18:55

Tinder. You can chat for free if you match with someone. Lots in your age group (you're a bit younger than me). I don't know the answer to your Hinge question - never liked it. Almost all my dates have come from Tinder. It's not just for hook ups as many believe. Good luck.

CandyApplePie · 15/05/2022 19:02

Agree with using tinder. All the ones on those sites will also be on tinder anyway

Summerholidayorcovidagain · 15/05/2022 19:04

And here's me wondering if this was the joinery section..
😬

anotherdisaster · 15/05/2022 19:34

No I am pretty sure you don't have to pay to message on Hinge. I used it a while ago (had zero luck) but I suspect its because these guy's just aren't replying. You get that on any site. I think Bumble is a bit better.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:39

They haven't read the messages as it still says sent.
I'll try Tinder!
Thanks Smile

OP posts:
LostAndLonely2022 · 15/05/2022 19:45

Never tried Hinge but I find Bumble slightly better than Tinder, and Match is awful (I'm the same age as you OP). Bumble and Tinder you can message for free once you match. I don't see the point in paying, paying would allow me to see who has 'liked' me, but unless I like them too we won't match anyway so if I just like the ones I like it amounts to the same thing.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:53

How do I match with someone on Tinder?? Sorry for stupid questions!

OP posts:
Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:54

Yeah, I stupidly paid for a 6 month subscription to Match. I have suspended my account. Don't like it at all!

OP posts:
Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:55

I see what you mean about it being pointless in paying as you both need to like each other. I definitely don't want to fork out anymore cash for dating sites!

OP posts:
WomanHere · 15/05/2022 19:58

Never used Hinge. Plenty of Fish has free messaging.

Bubbleha · 15/05/2022 19:59

You don't need to pay on hinge, and I found tinder quite horrifying in the speed of creepy messages coming through.

I would ignore anyone who likes your pictures though. Hinge really works if you put effort into captions as they're conversation starters. Go out looking and start up chats, or respond to anyone that bothers to put something more than 'hey there'.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:59

I've heard POF is definitely seen as a hook up site. Really not what I'm looking for.

OP posts:
Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 20:01

Hinge is a stupid name for a dating site!

OP posts:
anotherdisaster · 15/05/2022 20:15

YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 19:59

I've heard POF is definitely seen as a hook up site. Really not what I'm looking for.

I would say that about Tinder too. Mind you, there are loads of guys who I know just want to hook up who are on every single site - Bumble and Hinge included.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 20:42

Yeah, I think that's probably right!
I've just joined Tinder two minutes ago and got 33 likes but can't see any of them.

OP posts:
WeWantTheFinestWines · 15/05/2022 20:50

YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 20:42

Yeah, I think that's probably right!
I've just joined Tinder two minutes ago and got 33 likes but can't see any of them.

Swipe right on a profile you like, if they have swiped right on you you have matched and can chat.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 20:53

Ok, got it - thanks

OP posts:
ItsMutinyontheBunty · 15/05/2022 22:25

Joining in because I’m in a similar boat. Been single for a few months following a long marriage..trying Bumble and Ok Cupid. I like the concept of Bumble because at least you don’t get everyone messaging. But I’ve not had many matches and even less replies! I’ve only been on a few weeks. Avoiding Tinder so far because I’m not really into hook ups. I’ll be interested to see what you make of it.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 22:34

Well I got 99+ likes in the first hour but not matched as I man obviously fussy. See how it goes.

OP posts:
Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 15/05/2022 22:34

I am fussy that should say!

OP posts:
WeWantTheFinestWines · 16/05/2022 06:47

ItsMutinyontheBunty · 15/05/2022 22:25

Joining in because I’m in a similar boat. Been single for a few months following a long marriage..trying Bumble and Ok Cupid. I like the concept of Bumble because at least you don’t get everyone messaging. But I’ve not had many matches and even less replies! I’ve only been on a few weeks. Avoiding Tinder so far because I’m not really into hook ups. I’ll be interested to see what you make of it.

Tinder is not just for hook-ups. Many people are on there for relationships, many have found them. Any dating site will have people after hookups and people after relationships. What you have to do is vet people and only swipe right on those you like the look and sound of, those who have taken the time to write a profile, etc. Set boundaries - both in matching, chatting and dating - and be fussy.

It's not the site's job to determine someone's reason to be on there, it's yours.

There's a long running dating thread on here full of sensible advice and support.

OldSpeclkledHen · 16/05/2022 07:06

I've had a couple of relationships with guys from Tinder - it does work!

Back on there now 😂🙄🙄🙄🙄 lol

(Both previous tinder relationships had valid reasons for ending btw, not because the guys were twats🤣)

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 16/05/2022 07:08

I have had a lot more likes on Tinder but, as I'm not paying, I'm still to find one that I like that has liked me but will carry on. I like the fact you can remove your profile when you feel like it in the settings.

OP posts:
kolomo · 16/05/2022 07:34

Ignore the likes. It's just marketing that presses on your desire to not be rejected (human!). The only pertinent information is matches. I probably like 1 or 2% of the profiles on there, but there are SO many, that's plenty to get matches. Swipe through 50+ to find a match.

Also matches often come through later. Don't expect "it's a match" straight away. Remember, the other person has to be on there and see your profile, so if they've got an interesting life with other things to do, that might be a while.

Original poster
YorkshireTea72 · 16/05/2022 07:55

Ahhh, ok. Thanks

OP posts: