smoking in the house

[shellyr1989]

in the last few weeks gradually my boyfriend has been slowly staying in my home more nights a week. been together 4 years. he has always smoked since we met. i have always made it clear i hate smoking in a home and think its dirty. i pointed this out a million times b4.. this used to not be an issue but now hes here more he keeps try get away with smoking inside..started off standing just inside the back door to smoke..to now openly smoking when im not here or if im in bed.. this morning i got up and instantly smelt smoke from the upstairs landing.. went downstairs he had left for work..there was an ash tray with about 10 butts in it in the kitchen..not even trying to hide it.. bits of ash on the table and ground...its driving me absolutely insane.. surely this is just complete and utter ignorance at this stage how can i get through to him how big a problem this is gonna cause between us..

Did it not strike you , the smell of nicotine, when you first met? Smokers always lie about the number of fags they smoke. Take that number & double it. Smoking killed my dad. If you handed him a cup of “poison” would he drink it? Of course not but he’ll breath it in!
Why would you want to kiss a bloke who’s breath must, from time to time, stink like an old ashtray?

I AM a smoker and even i think smoking inside the house is rancid. Its gross and the fact he just doesnt give a shit youve made it clear not to and he thinks he can just do it when youre not there is a BIG early indication of the type of person he is, and it 'aint good

If he isn't going to stop this, you can't let him stay in your home. It's not fair, it's disgusting, and it shows he has a complete disrespect for your boundaries.

Vaping stinks as well just in a different way, and will still cause coughing indoors so those go outdoors as well.

😂😂😂😂

are you the boyfriend?

Yep next thing he'll be vaping 24/7 including right in your presence and will argue with you that it isn't as bad

I would nip this in the bud before it even happens and say that has to be used outside too

Outside smoking area for smokes, inside for vaping. Everyone benefits. No need for a celebratory blow job, unless both parties are into it.

Compromise, solutions and no unnecessary confrontation.

@houseonthehill thanks for your level headed reply.. Hopefully compromising on the vape will help.. Time will tell as i said before..

You have accepted his smoking for 4 years, what did you expect?

He has shown you just how much respect he has for you and your home.

How a non smoker could be near a smoker and the smell is beyond me.

I enjoyed a few cigarettes in my 20's and even then I knew the smell was rank.

Be wary of someone who clearly doesn't respect you and your wishes.

😂

I smoke when I have a drink. I would never do it in the house. I banish myself to be away from the doors abs windows as I don't want the house to smell of smoke or let my Dd see me

My partners Dad and step Mum both vape, pretty constantly.

Everything from their house smells.

When my child visits her clothes, hair etc smells qgwn she comes back.

Christmas gifts esp.clothing from them smell.

And we don't know everything about longterm effect of vapimg yet, if I'm correct (?)

But why have you put up with this for so long ... presumably you share a bed and have sex with and kiss a smoker ... if it is that abhorrent to you why do you accept it? Even if he smokes outside does he clean his teeth before he comes near you? I don't smoke and have never, ever dated a smoker ..
there are plenty of fish in the sea .....

Get rid. I'm a smoker but never inside my house and certainly not in anybody else's!

I've also tried 2 relationships with smokers and one house share.

They always say they're giving up thry don't.

They always say they're sticking to smoking outside m, they don't.

You end up being the bad guy and nag for reacting tk their smoking behaviour abd their failure to stop any of it

Smokers and non smokers are fairly incompatible in my experience.

Tbh he's also a cheeky fucker, and that won't change.

You're on a hiding to nowhere (or whatever the phrase is).

vaping is worse than smoking- no regulation on the chemicals included and it goes straight into your blood stream through your lungs. It’s the next medical disaster waiting to happen. Do not let anyone tell you vaping doesn’t count.

Forgive me if I've misunderstood your post, are you saying you have a child and you smoke inside?

Because that's incredibly harmful to your child's health, regardless of whether they're present when you light up.

Getting the right vape can be tricky when you’re used to just lighting a cigarette, so good on him for making the effort and taking your stance seriously (as he should’ve). If he needs any advice on getting the right kit or eliquid, the folk over at Planet Of The Vapes (website) are very helpful and will set him right, and answer any questions. Hopefully you’re both on the right path to now.

I hate smoking. I'd never have a relationship with anyone who smokes. I've only got one friend who smokes, usually one a day after her supper and outside her own house. Smokers have never been part of my social circle. It just happened that way.

Get the right vape, save on overpriced scented candles.

And a nice pie and pint of beer, followed by another blow job, and a puppy.

Well, you seem over-generous there, but if you want to... we're only trying to find a good solution to the problem of the bf smoking in the house.