Does it give you the ick when you're messaging an online match and they call you "sexy"

[Crackalackindoodah]

More context, I am unwell and he's messaged saying "wish there was something I could do to make you feel much better sexy"
The sexy bit made me feel ick.
I don't know why but I don't like it.

Yup. Especially before you've even met. It's an instant 'unmatch' from me.

Urgh. I know. I feel ick now. I don't even want to message him back. We haven't met yet no.

Yeah that's off-putting. It tells you what they prioritise and the reason they think you exist.

Yup, anyone who mentions any of my physical attributes before having met, would be an instant no.

It's generic. I wouldn't want to be chatting to someone who sees me as part of the herd.
It's also unimaginative.

I wouldn't have even cared if it was "babe" or "lovely" but stuff like sexy or gorgeous is too much too soon and feel inappropriate.

It’s an instant unmatch and block from me.

Even thinking about it makes me shudder.

Shall I just block and delete. We swapped numbers after a few days of speaking and arranged to meet this week. Feel really icky now.

Yep, I instantly unmatched these. If they haven't even met me yet, they (should) have no idea if they'd actually feel attraction to me ... I could turn out to be an awful person! I was looking for mutual attraction based on two people liking each other as individual people, not "I'll shag anything that's female" attraction

Well we basically face timed the other day and he was very pleased with who he saw he said. So he's seen me on a face time. But even so. You still shouldn't call someone sexy in that manner.

Total objectification OP. If the conversation was the other way round, would you add that on the end?

Yep, agree with PPs they go straight in the bin for that 🗑

'Sexy' 'babe' 'wish I was in bed cuddling you' 'I bet your hands are majic' 'I really like you'

All get a block.

@CrowAndArrow

'Sexy' 'babe' 'wish I was in bed cuddling you' 'I bet your hands are majic' 'I really like you'

All get a block.

This makes me chuckle 🤣

Nobody should talk about cuddling you before they've met you.

I’d feel the same as you. Don’t waste your time

Urgh, definitely! It's creepy!

I had been messaging a man for one day, one! On his day off. He was at work the next day and told me he missed me! This gave me the instant ick because it just felt silly that after one day of admittedly frequent messages he felt he could miss me as the messages had to slow down. Total love bomber alert and more fool me for engaging with it.

@Mermaidwaves

I had been messaging a man for one day, one! On his day off. He was at work the next day and told me he missed me! This gave me the instant ick because it just felt silly that after one day of admittedly frequent messages he felt he could miss me as the messages had to slow down. Total love bomber alert and more fool me for engaging with it.

One day 😳😳😳 How did you get rid of him?

Any mention of being physical or tactile in their profiles also puts me right off. It screams sex pest.

He's sexualising conversations that shouldn't be sexual. If he can't converse with you without sexualising you, that's a bit of a warning sign that he mainly sees women in a certain way.

@Crackalackindoodah
I deleted my profile off OLD...again. everytime I try OLD I just come across odd men, either massively needy or way too emotionally unavailable. Where are the healthy inbetweeners?

Oh this guy now has my mobile number. I don't know if I should say anything or literally just block and delete.

@Crackalackindoodah

Oh this guy now has my mobile number. I don't know if I should say anything or literally just block and delete.

Block and delete. He's a creep.

Eww no, block and delete!