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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Partner messaging woman, shared my pic with her

85 replies

Wtf2022 · 18/04/2022 10:57

Found out that partner had been messaging a woman he's met through work a lot (by met I mean messaging & calls, it doesn't seem.like they've met in person).

There's lots of mundane, even day stuff in the texting, alongside flirtation, but in the last couple of days it became increasingly sexual.

He asked whether she'd ever had a threesome (in the context of her saying she'd worked in a certain environment with lots of good looking young women when she was a lot younger), she said no, but he escalated that to talking about a threesome involving me, then sent her a pic of me. He'd told her i was gorgeous, and she said that wasn't really high praise given he says she's gorgeous etc. and she's not. He sent the pic and said "see, do you trust my judgement to call a woman pretty" etc.

She asked him what my opinion of a threesome was, and he answered "haven't got that far yet".

We're together nearly 20 years, 2 kids.

OP posts:
Onthedunes · 18/04/2022 17:16

Lewd bastard.

For God's sake chuck him out of your life.

His kids must be so proud of him.

Yuk, sleazy, seedy git.

Even reading about this makes me want to take a shower. Gross.

Crikeyalmighty · 18/04/2022 17:25

What a total arse. I would tell him he’s got a choice, either take his bags(prepacked when he is out) and get out the house immediately OR I will be forwarding the messages to all his family within 24 hours to explain why we were separating.

GingerDuo · 18/04/2022 17:36

Bloody hell. This sounds similar to a guy I matched with on a dating site. Not over his "dp" and wanted to organise a threesome and isn't she gorgeous etc. I told him to go away and think about what he wanted and not to show her photo to anyone ever again!!

Herejustforthisone · 18/04/2022 17:37

Please tell me you aren’t going to accept this, OP?

Countdownis35 · 18/04/2022 17:38

[quote NeverChange]@Countdownis35. Where I did I kick the OP?

I simply stated how quickly I would run from this situation of it were me.

I'm entitled to my opinion every much as you are.[/quote]
TELLING OP she needs more respect for herself. Give her bloody chance!! It was quite a blunt jump on response. Yes your entitled but no need to pile on like I said. One is allowed to gather their thoughts.

WTF475878237NC · 18/04/2022 17:46

I just wanted to say how sorry I am. I would be absolutely heartbroken to see these messages.

bitchymcbitch · 18/04/2022 17:50

He is an absolute twat of a cunt

billy1966 · 18/04/2022 18:00

I wouldn't bother letting on.

I would be getting organised.

He has one leg out the door.

Crikeyalmighty · 18/04/2022 18:33

Yes as someone else said, not only is OP probably blazing mad , shes probably extremely upset/heartbroken too — so it’s really unfair to say to someone— show some self respect!! The poor OP hasn’t even had time to draw breath and think through the next course of action. Admittedly I would be throwing him out, but there’s no need to actually imply she’s lacking in self respect

Countdownis35 · 18/04/2022 18:37

To be honest I'd be doing a whole lot of digging! But I'm a nosy cow and my mind wouldn't be able to rest! I would want to known of others..

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