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Two days before due date and partner going clubbing. Am i being unreasonasble?

58 replies

NewMama2 · 17/04/2022 22:37

Last night my partner went clubbing. I spoke to him and told him I would prefer he did not go as I am so close to my due date and do not want to catch covid, but he still went. Around 6 months pregnant I caught covid from him after he had been to the club. He's going again tonight when I only have two days left, I have expressed my worries to him but he's convinced he is not going to get covid. Am I being unreasonable for feeling upset? I just feel he's going out being irresponsible and potentially putting my and baby's health at risk.

OP posts:
MolliciousIntent · 17/04/2022 22:40

Yeah YBU - as long as his phone is on and he's sober enough to support you in labour I don't think you can reasonably stop him. You're presumably vaccinated and have had it recently - the chances of you getting even mildly ill are slim, and even slimmer for your baby. And I say that as someone who tested positive while in the hospital giving birth!

LouiseTrees · 17/04/2022 22:42

I don’t think covid is the worst thing that could happen, although he is irresponsible for that too. You could go into labour and be unable to reach a phone if it’s very sudden and let’s say you drop yours out of reach. Then go through childbirth alone and unable to get to hospital. What an idiot this man is.

NewMama2 · 17/04/2022 22:48

@MolliciousIntent thank you for a different view to look at it. I am still upset as if he does catch covid he will not be allowed in the hospital to support me. Plus the signal in clubs are not always the best

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teaandchocolate1 · 17/04/2022 22:55

@NewMama2

I completely understand you. I wouldn't like my partner going clubbing shortly before my due date.

He needs to be around to give you physical and emotional support.

At least that was the case for me with my two pregnancies.

LightSpeeds · 17/04/2022 22:58

Will he stay soberish -- enough to get to the hospital and to be useful if you went into labour?

How are you planning to get to the hospital?

NewMama2 · 17/04/2022 23:02

@LightSpeeds I have no idea if he will be soberish or if he is even sober right now. He went to have a bbq with his friends earlier today and has said he's going clubbing now. To get to the hospital I have my sister on standby now just incase

OP posts:
notwhatineednow · 17/04/2022 23:02

YANBU, totally unreasonable to go out clubbing 2 days before your due date, regardless of covid.

He shouldn't be going tonight either, WTF is he playing at?

Hugasauras · 17/04/2022 23:04

I wouldn't want my partner presumably drinking quite a lot when my due date was so close. Will he be drunk? What happens if you go into labour? Will he pitch up at the hospital 6 pints in? How are you getting there?

If it was an event that he could easily return from and wasn't going to be impaired then I would be more relaxed. But clubbing generally = boozing = difficulty getting in touch with someone.

NewMama2 · 17/04/2022 23:06

@teaandchocolate1 I do really need the support right now. I want him to still enjoy but it's like now I'm at the end of my pregnancy he's spending the whole day out with his mates then going to club after on top of that and not messaging until the next day around 2 pm because he's exhausted from being out.

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ImJustMadAboutSaffron · 17/04/2022 23:07

Imminent fatherhood and he's going clubbing? He's immature and irresponsible.

HollowTalk · 17/04/2022 23:07

What the hell does this man think he's doing? You are due to have a baby in a couple of days time and he is off clubbing? What is he generally like as a partner? Sounds a bit of a knob to be honest.

Hugasauras · 17/04/2022 23:07

Are you both quite young? Do you live together?

JaniceBattersby · 17/04/2022 23:09

Can’t he have a few bloody weeks off clubbing while you’re so heavily pregnant / have a newborn?! I guess you’ve managed abstain from partying so not sure why he can’t?

I’d be really bloody angry actually. He’s going to need to be there to support you in labour and afterwards and he can’t really do that if he’s steaming and has been up all night lighting up the dance floor.

YesitsBess · 17/04/2022 23:10

I'm sorry he's doing what now?

Do you have an alternative ride to the hospital? I'll deal with the other myriads of nonsense once I know you're safe and able to deliver with as little stress a ls possible.

LightSpeeds · 17/04/2022 23:10

He's being pretty selfish.

I hope he gets a lot more on-board when you have the baby.

YesitsBess · 17/04/2022 23:12

@ImJustMadAboutSaffron

Imminent fatherhood and he's going clubbing? He's immature and irresponsible.
I agree wholeheartedly with this but mine bought a sodding Kawasaki Ninja the day before out daughter was born, completely freaked out. He managed to be a decent father after that.
HeddaGarbled · 17/04/2022 23:15

COVID is the least of your worries. Here’s a man whose partner is about to have his baby but he’s off having fun with his mates all day and night leaving you alone on the Easter weekend.

He’s a crap boyfriend and you know he’s going to be a crap dad, don’t you?

You can’t rely on him. Stick with your sister.

TurkeyRoastvBubbleandSqueek · 17/04/2022 23:16

@notwhatineednow

YANBU, totally unreasonable to go out clubbing 2 days before your due date, regardless of covid.

He shouldn't be going tonight either, WTF is he playing at?

^^ THIS! THIS with Bells and Nobs on, for the complete Bellend that he is.

Please don't have anymore babies with this immature man child. In fact he is so childish that I am surprised that he could get an erection, and even more surprised that it had any working sperm in it!

Unless he grows up incredibly quickly on becoming a father, and supports you fully in the upbringing of your child, please chuck him out as soon as you have all your proverbial ducks in a row.

Good luck with the birth @NewMama2 💐

Eightiesfan · 17/04/2022 23:16

@ImJustMadAboutSaffron

Imminent fatherhood and he's going clubbing? He's immature and irresponsible.
This, what on earth is he thinking? I hope he pulls his head out of his ass when baby arrives.
ladydimitrescu · 17/04/2022 23:18

YANBU - you could have the baby any moment! He's a selfish arse, he shouldn't want to go in the first place. I'm fuming on your behalf.

ZealAndArdour · 17/04/2022 23:19

Covid or no covid, you are really not being unreasonable at all.

Can’t imagine a scenario where in two days from giving birth and my DP would rather be in a club than with me.

toomuchlaundry · 17/04/2022 23:23

How old is he? COVID is the least of your worries

TurkeyRoastvBubbleandSqueek · 17/04/2022 23:24

@MolliciousIntent

Yeah YBU - as long as his phone is on and he's sober enough to support you in labour I don't think you can reasonably stop him. You're presumably vaccinated and have had it recently - the chances of you getting even mildly ill are slim, and even slimmer for your baby. And I say that as someone who tested positive while in the hospital giving birth!
Your username here isn't far off is it *@MolliciousIntent? If I were @NewMama2* I would be retracting that "thank you" and telling you where to go. Are you trying to be "woke" and "fair" to her crap boyfriend? I bet you wouldn't accept that sort of behaviour in real life.
Rachelw84 · 17/04/2022 23:30

YANBU - you’re so close to giving birth and he’s out clubbing!

I don’t understand why people are so blasé about covid, it’s a nasty virus and your partner out mixing with others puts you and other mothers on the ward at risk if he picks it up and he doesn’t initially show symptoms

I hope you’re ok and things go smoothly but your partner seems quite selfish

Whatsmyname100 · 17/04/2022 23:40

Yanbu at all. I don't think I could be with someone whose mentality is that is ok to be clubbing just before your baby is due. So he's been out last night, today with his friends and going out again tonight? He sounds pathetic and useless. I would really get some back up help for when the baby arrives, sounds like he is not going to be bothered that much.

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