What was the pivotal moment in your life that defined you wanted to be single for the rest of your life?

[Dragonistai]

For me, it's been one too many bad online dates and not having the tenacity to do it anymore.
I've now hung up my dating app shoes.
I have my daughter, I don't want any more children.. I don't need a man to have more children.
I now am on the road to accepting myself and working on my life and bettering aspects of it.
What was your moment?

I'm still getting over my marriage ending 4 months ago. I am determined this year to fall in love with myself. I have been thinking recently how lovely it is just me and the dc. I am not interested in a man right now, that might be long term. This might be my pivotal moment.

I gave up after meeting a good few people from online dating.
Not a single one appealed to me either for sexual relationships or a partnership etc
I have since been really thinking about it and I'm not convinced I feel sexually attracted to anyone and have always found the physical act more of a messy and sticky chore.

@RantyAunty

The realisation that no man has ever made my life better.

They have made my life worse and harder in many ways.
That they are selfish by nature and ruled by their dicks.

Never a truer word spoken imo

Like many on this thread I was widowed relatively young, in my late 40s and had a very happy marriage. I had one short relationship after that which was an emotional rollercoaster and after I recovered from it I realised I prefer calm and I don't think I can face going through that again, it's too much trouble! And now with menopause my libido has collapsed, so another reason a relationship would probably be too much trouble. Coupled friends are all getting persistent UTIs - no thanks. Instead I've filled my life with new friends and activities and a dog! I have adult DC and I will love having DGC in the future. It wasn't a decision I made at a specific time, more like a gradual realisation. Just writing this is saying it out loud and I just feel relieved and increasingly content.

There are many reasons for me but the biggest one is that I couldn’t put my heart in someone’s else’s hands again. I’ve had a lot of emotional pain in my life, from various sources, and it hasn’t made me “stronger”. I am damaged and too old to try and “fix” it. Time hasn’t healed my wounds. It’s patched them up, but they are still there. I can’t risk reopening them. It makes me sad sometimes. But I count my blessings and shake it off.

Yes empowering thread and lovely post @DressingPafe. My pivotal moment was last night when my supposedly loving partner of 6 months stonewalled me again because I dared question him about his cold behaviour and he kept trying to shut me down. This was the man who purported to be deeply in love with me and who couldn’t see a future without me. I left his house, never to return. I’m disappointed because at 64 I reckon this is the last chance I’ll get. But far better to be single and in control than with someone who adores you one minute and seems to deeply dislike you the next. I have plenty else to keep me going - family, friends, dog, work etc.

My DW died 20 months ago. I cannot imagine being with anyone else, I'm still married to her heart and soul.

@RantyAunty. Yep ! I can say in all honesty that men have made my life better at times, but it was relatively short lived. After 2 or 3 years I personally find that any attraction wanes and they show their true colours. Maybe some of us have higher standards than others - I do have a couple of friends with very good long term relationships and am pleased for them but maybe their tolerance threshold is higher than mine. I like space and time and being able to do what you want when you want- and the older I’ve got the harder I have found it as I find many men get quite needy once past 50.

@OutbackQueen well done you!! Never too late to start living again :-)