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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Mothers day

37 replies

Missusmiddleage · 27/03/2022 12:21

So I'm currently sitting in my bedroom having had to make my own breakfast and had nothing for mothers day, not a card, nothing. This is the last installation of my husband being a selfish, inconsiderate pig and I'm done.
I have even made sure that HIS MUM gets flowers delivered today from us and he can't even get his arse into gear to take my daughter out to get a card for me. Even if on the off chance he goes out now its too little too late. I'm literally done

OP posts:

Shoxfordian · 27/03/2022 12:31

He sounds very inconsiderate
It’s not your job to sort out his mothers flowers either

LightSpeeds · 27/03/2022 12:38

Good. Fuck that bastard.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 27/03/2022 12:40

This post every single birthday, christmas, mothers day from lots of posters.
Why are men such lazy inconsiderate shits. I'm glad I live alone. In my marriage I never got gifts or anything for any of these and quite honestly was second to all my ex's hobbies and activities and was nothing more than a glorified maid even though I was the main bread winner.

layladomino · 27/03/2022 14:04

Well that's the last time you need to organise any presents for his mum / his family. Or for him.

What is your situation? Have you had any legal advice on how a split would work?

Project forward to Mothers Day next year - you could be separated or divorced, and enjoying Mothers Day with DD - how will you spend it?

When I divorced exH, I realised at Christmas time that it had to happen. After Christmas, as I packed away the decorations, I promised myself that when I next unpacked them we would no longer be together. It was my little secret, but I enjoyed imagining my next Christmas, without him. My joy, 11 months later, at unpacking those decorations and comparing my life, was wonderful.

Imagine your new life and start working towards it tomorrow.

As for today - what can you do with DD? Go for a walk and a coffee? Bake some cakes? Film and pizza?

Chicksville007 · 27/03/2022 15:04

Same here, I ordered the flowers for his mum even though she does like me. I buy the birthday and Christmas presents and cards, and she always makes a note of calling to say what lovely words are written. Or how thoughtful the presents are and tells me in such a way to rub my nose in it not realising it’s my hand writing.

Christmas and birthdays are on the same day EVERY YEAR but I get the same “I didn’t know it was today, I’ve gone you nothing”. Yet full reminders a month in advance for his. We have a son but I expect the birthday build up from him because he 12.

It’s currently 3pm and no one has wished me Happy Mothers Day let alone a cup of tea, card etc I can’t even watch what I want on the bloody telly.

Men are such crap. Even when we all had COVID at the same time it was me alone taking care of them and no help given. One day is not a lot to ask for I’d settle for a morning or an even an hour.

I feel for you, from one Mum to another

HAPPY MOTHERS SAY 💐🌺🌸 ☕️🍫 🚬 ❤️

Chicksville007 · 27/03/2022 15:07

Oooppps I mean Day xxx

Original poster

Missusmiddleage · 27/03/2022 15:26

Same I've been in my room for hours and just gone down stairs to make my own lunch and bring it back upstairs. It's not my daughters fault really but I just can't help being pissed off, full stop. My husband and I have the same pattern, he pisses me off being a selfish prick and I say nothing then its forgotten about till the next thing that happens, which is being more frequent than not.
Do I have to just put up with this life? I know if I say anything I'll be accused of being a moody bitch and it wouldn't be his fault because he never apologises. We both work full time,, he does shifts and during the pandemic I was really ill and had a stroke, when I got round to getting back to work he gave me all this crap about helping out and apart from doing a few bits that are apparently "for me" he never clears up after himSelf even when we have a cleaner which I pay for

OP posts:

Bunty55 · 27/03/2022 15:49

You call yourself Mrsmiddleage. Does this mean your daughter is a young woman and not a child?

It's Mothers Day today. What did your daughter do?

Original poster

Missusmiddleage · 27/03/2022 16:06

I'm 45 and my daughter is 14 and my son is 20.

OP posts:

GrazingSheep · 27/03/2022 16:08

At 14 and 20 I think it’s up to your children.

freesoul12 · 27/03/2022 16:14

I think its not all down to him. your children should have made the effort to write something. I would tell them how does it make you feel indirectly

babasaclover · 27/03/2022 16:29

I have the same. Wankers the lot of them when I asked if he had booked anything for Sunday he actually said 'what for'

Original poster

Missusmiddleage · 27/03/2022 16:37

Certainly my 20 year old should have done something but we live in the middle of nowhere in Devon so my 14year old would have had to relie on her dad to take her somewhere to at least get a card or flowers. Any how it's not happened and this is the long laundry list of them not giving a shit,

OP posts:

MrsLargeEmbodied · 27/03/2022 16:39

even my 22 year old made me a hand made card

cant understand why you are blaming your dh

whitewashing · 27/03/2022 16:46

Couldn’t your children arranged a card from Amazon/moonpig?

Original poster

Missusmiddleage · 27/03/2022 16:55

Yeah they probably could have, but surely it's my husband that should be setting an example to my daughter of how she should be expected to be treated by man.
This is the last thing in a long list of things, the least he could habe done is to help my daughter

OP posts:

Chicksville007 · 27/03/2022 16:55

Mothers Day is just another opportunity to be called moody and hormonal when your made to feel unappreciated. It seems that one day out of the year is to much to ask for, how much giving you we do.

SpinningTheSeedsOfLove · 27/03/2022 16:57

Well he's a shit, and your 14 and 20 year old children need telling that it hurts you to be treated like crap.

Then do something about it.

luckylavender · 27/03/2022 17:21

@Missusmiddleage

I'm 45 and my daughter is 14 and my son is 20.

Your children should definitely step up & sort things out.

luckylavender · 27/03/2022 17:22

@Missusmiddleage

She could make you a card & make you breakfast in bed.

LittleBirdBlu · 27/03/2022 17:24

I agree with pp, your rubbish Mother's Day is down to your children. They are both old enough to make you breakfast or lunch and old enough to make/sort out a card for you.

Bunty55 · 27/03/2022 17:52

I appreciate your husband is a bit of a shit, but your daughter should be ashamed

SunflowerTed · 27/03/2022 17:54

@Shehasadiamondinthesky

This post every single birthday, christmas, mothers day from lots of posters. Why are men such lazy inconsiderate shits. I'm glad I live alone. In my marriage I never got gifts or anything for any of these and quite honestly was second to all my ex's hobbies and activities and was nothing more than a glorified maid even though I was the main bread winner.

They aren’t all lazy shits though.

BoodleBug51 · 27/03/2022 17:55

I hope you remember this on Fathers Day.

They all sound very self absorbed, OP. MD has been advertised on the TV for weeks.

SunflowerTed · 27/03/2022 17:55

@whitewashing

Couldn’t your children arranged a card from Amazon/moonpig?

Totally agree. Your whole family are shits not just your husband

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