Would you give someone the time of day who has previously ghosted you?

[Picolino]

Nc for this..
I was ghosted by an online date that I spent a few weeks getting to know. He flaked out when trying to meet up and then eventually just stopped replying. I never blocked him and accepted I had been ghosted with good grace, however crap it made me feel..now a couple of months later, he's WhatsApped me and apologised and saying he wasn't in the best of place before and he wasn't quite ready to date but now he is...
I've read the WhatsApp but not replied..
Part of me thinks how very fucking dare you and feel like giving him a few choice words.. Ghosting really is the cowards way out.. A small part of me wants to believe him and I did invest a lot of time getting to know him and felt we could've had a connection.
The trouble is. If that's how they can treat you from the get go, then who knows what they can actually be like after you've met them and God forbid, sleep with them.
Am I better off just ignoring his message?

I would reply "who is this?".

@Picolino

So the ghoster has found me on another dating site and has given me a lot of script about all of his difficulties and to give him another chance as he wants to make it up to me..

Oh this sounds boring.

Do not get involved, he's an arse. You have better options, such as being single.

Oh god, no.

First of all, you’d be interacting with someone that has ascertained from their bad behaviour that your boundaries are low.

People you’ve never interacted with before - zero points / neutral
People you’ve interacted with and had a positive experience with - above zero / positive
People you’ve interacted with and had a negative experience with - below zero / minus points

Meaning - there’s a whole world out there and this guy is already on the negative side of the scale. Waste of time.

Nope, he had someone else he preferred and that has gone tits up so he has come back.

Yuck, ignore!

More generally, would minimise time interacting online before a first meet up in person.

@Tamworth123

That first sentence is a really good reply.

@Picolino

it feels like total b*llocks to me.

Is it a bereavement?

@Picolino Doesn't make any difference what 'didficulties' he may have been going through at the time (if there were any) - he showed himself to have zero consideration for you, or any sense of appropriate grown up behaviour, or decent manners, to leave you hanging.
You owe him nothing. Ignore.

Sod that for a laugh. Does he think that every time something difficult happens, he can ghost you in future? Not a healthy or adult response.

He's trying to reel you in with a sob story. Even if what he's telling you is real, he's trying to appeal to your emotions so that you'll let your guard down and respond. Don't. As everyone else has said, it would have taken no time at all to let you know in December that he wasn't in the right place to date, but instead he chose to drop you like a hot potato. I wouldn't be surprised if he turns unpleasant when you don't respond, maybe even turns it around on you by suggesting that you're mean to not even reply! It's what they do. Enjoy the show, but don't engage.

Nope. He's either flaky, selfish, going to cite mental health as a constant excuse for going off radar and letting you down, or was hedging his bets and has got back in touch with you when a relationship with someone else didn't work out. None of them are good options and if I were single again I'd rather stay single than be arsed with that kind of aggro.

Something similar happened to me... reconnected a couple of months ago with someone who was flaky last year.. guess what? They just flaked again. 🙄
If I were you I wouldn't give them the time of day all over again tbh.

He was getting to know someone else and it hasn't worked out so he is now approaching his number two option, or perhaps number seven.
Someone did this to me, i ignored and met my husband.

Never in a million

@user1480097724

I would assume he met someone else he thought he might like more but it didn't work out. There's no excuse really for ghosting someone, however much of a "bad time" he believes or says he was having. He will also think it's easy to manipulate you if you respond. On the other hand, you could chat then tell him it's not working for you after a few conversations. I'd do that because I'm bitter and vengeful though!!

This

I went back to a ghoster and got ghosted again. Can confirm it was annoying. Would not recommend.

Get him to fuck and get yourself some self respect. He didnt have a lot going on, he just had a lot of better options.

No. Been there and got the tshirt. It's beyond disrespectful. Ignore, then delete or block or whatever and never accept poor treatment.

Even if they met somebody else and that didn't work out, they still failed to communicate that nicely. But, tbh you're better off that they didnt finesse the bare truth that they were confident enough that they could do better than you so they felt no need to bother even keeping you on the back burner. Those guys are a real nightmare

No, people who do this are a waste of space.

Give him those choice words and tell him he's fucking rude, but don't give him another chance. I think ignoring could reinforce and legitimise ghosting in a way - calling them out might just teach them manners . Years ago, I had a brief fling with this chap. Then I called and left a couple of voicemails but he never responded. Couple of months later he called me at work to ask me out again. I told him that he was bloody rude, that he should have called me at least to say he didn't want to meet up again, and that no bloody way would I see him again after that. He apologised. I felt great. I never spoke to him again. My co-workers in the open-plan office may or may not have enjoyed it

"Basic manners are a minimum standard of mine. Good luck with your issues".
Brilliant @Tamworth123