What do you do when you can't agree on another baby?

[Busybeebusybee123]

Just that really, I am desperate for another baby, h isn't . This has been the source of arguments for over a year, we have an awful argument where he hints he doesn't want another child, the following day he's always sorry and that he does want another yet when it comes to trying for one he starts an argument and the whole cycle starts again. He has a drinking problem along with anxiety but he does nothing to help himself I have tried and tried to help but he just doesn't want it. I'm at a point now where I want to end the relationship because we want different things . Some advice would be appreciated. Thankyou for reading

Then you don't have another, especially not with a man with a drinking problem.

Why would you want another baby with a drunk?

Don't bring another kid into that mess.

I wouldn't have a child with a man who a) doesn't want one and b) has a drinking problem.

Stay and don't have a child or leave and have one with someone else/by yourself.

All of the above

You do some really deep thinking about why you would want a baby with an alcoholic. Poor child.

Even without the drink issue, you don't bring a new life into it when both parents aren't on board.

Have you told him that you thinking of ending the relationship because of how strongly you want another baby? He may change his mind, and if not, you have your answer.

1. The person who doesn't want one wins.

1. Don't foist a drinker on another baby. Having an alcoholic father isn't a good thing.

How old is your other child/ren?

He has a drinking problem. I have had 39 years of having a parent with an alcohol problem. Don't willingly subject a child to that.

Your previous thread about him shows he is financially abusing you. It also shows he has physically abused you by shoving you. You say you feel you can’t leave although you wish to. The thread is here www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/a4370098-Just-fed-up?msgid=111475355#111475355

Here in this thread you say he has drinking problems in addition to the above and also mental health difficulties.

What leads you to decide that producing another child with this individual is the right outcome for you, your existing child or your hypothetical next child?

Whhhhhhy would you want to have another baby with an alcoholic?

Why do you want another child with a problem drinker?

@MrsTerryPratchett

1. The person who doesn't want one wins.

1. Don't foist a drinker on another baby. Having an alcoholic father isn't a good thing.

Yup.

Ending the relationship sounds like a good plan. (And not as a way to try to get him to agree)

Contact Women's Aid.

With the way the world is? Don't have another child. Especially not with an unwilling partner to boot.

Jesus Christ no that's mental

Ending your shit marriage would be the best thing you can do for the poor kid you’ve already produced. Cruel to inflict a violent, financially abusive drunkard on another kid. Get therapy and raise your standards for bare minimum acceptable behaviour in life, before making more people.

Agree with everyone else. Don't have another baby with him and don't stay with a drinker (alcohol will be his main priority, not you or your child).

@NowEvenBetter

Ending your shit marriage would be the best thing you can do for the poor kid you’ve already produced. Cruel to inflict a violent, financially abusive drunkard on another kid. Get therapy and raise your standards for bare minimum acceptable behaviour in life, before making more people.

^^This OP another baby will make every one of your problems worse and you less able to extricate yourself from this relationship.

@NowEvenBetter

Ending your shit marriage would be the best thing you can do for the poor kid you’ve already produced. Cruel to inflict a violent, financially abusive drunkard on another kid. Get therapy and raise your standards for bare minimum acceptable behaviour in life, before making more people.

This.

It's unthinkably selfish to want to bring another innocent child into this mess.

He's allowed to not want a baby. Just take him at his word and stop asking him. Move on and find someone who does. If he's a drunk etc... why would you want one with him anyway? Do everyone in the situation a favour and just break up.

So he's an alcoholic. Who abuses you. And your problem in this situation. Is that you want to get pregnant by him again. Riiiiiiiight.

Seriously, do you hear yourself?

Why do you want another child with an abusive alcoholic?

Why in the name of fuck would you want to have a baby with someone who has a drinking problem? That would be so incredibly beyond selfish.

You don’t t have one.