Credit card - any of your business ?

[GeneLovesJezebel]

Is your DH/DW’s credit card bill any of your business ?

What's prompted you to ask?

I think it depends on whether you share money. No point chucking it in a pot and agreeing a budget for the other to run up 000s on credit card. Genaeral day to day spending within budget I'd say no.

Hundreds of pounds being paid out of a joint account to pay it off.
I know what some of it is, but not all.

No because our money is separate. If we had joint finances it would be.

Totally your business if joint account being used to pay it off- in my opinion

No, but in our house the joint account isn’t used to clear them, unless we’ve agreed to use it for a holiday or large purchase. Otherwise I use mine for day to day spends as it gains cash back and points, clear it most months

If you consider the amount to be beyond what you consider reasonable, you are going to have to ask what has been purchased. There may be a very reasonable explanation, like needing clothes for the new season, etc.?

I’m not sure if it’s better that these days married couples are entitled to privacy, or if it was better when couples were treated like one person and you knew what was going on 🤔

If you are paying it off then you are entitled to know what just being used for.

We are in an economic partnership. A credit card bill is private only to the extent that it might hold the details to a gift. Otherwise we have total financial transparency.

Some if it seems to be going on what he collects. He says it’s an investment, I say it’s a waste of money. I’d rather have money in the account.

@GeneLovesJezebel

I’m not sure if it’s better that these days married couples are entitled to privacy, or if it was better when couples were treated like one person and you knew what was going on 🤔

Definitely the former. Everyone’s entitled to privacy, but if you’re married and sharing finances, and there’s reason to believe something’s amiss, then you need to ask what’s going on.

My credit card is my business. If I need to use the joint account to pay it off, it becomes DH’s business.

Yes if you are married. Even if you have separate bank accounts legally you are jointly responsible. Talk honestly about money, saves so many problems

@GeneLovesJezebel

Some if it seems to be going on what he collects. He says it’s an investment, I say it’s a waste of money. I’d rather have money in the account.

If he’s collecting it then it should be him that’s paying it off, not the joint finances.

I’d be arguing that if he can’t afford to pay outright for his ‘collection’ then he can’t afford to buy it in the first place. He shouldn’t be getting into cc debt & affecting joint finances just because he wants to collect something.

The credit card bill is a red herring. You’re more concerned that he’s spending large amount of money on his hobby. You need an open and hones conversation about your finances.

We share finances but also have an agreed amount of “fun money” which one can spend without any judgment or questioning from the other. We go over finances every 6months to make sure it’s on budget. Fun money amount changes if needed at the six month review.

We both work part time and enjoy holidays so it’s helpful for us to be pretty strict about the budget!

Neither of us had ever had one but I imagine it would be especially if they were racking up debt and living beyond their means

Well the kind of investment is relevant here. If it’s something he would never sell, then it isn’t an investment.

Also if you are both paying for it then it’s a joint investment and you have every right to know what it is in case you split up. I think you are going to say it’s something like records or guitars maybe which is an investment really for him only— am I maybe right??

It’s not something I’m interested in.
And it’s fine saying it worth whatever, but something is only worth what someone will pay for it.

I think you will find in law married couples are every bit as much one financial entity as they always were. If you are running things differently, that's because he's hiding stuff. I hope his collection has a good resale value, because if you were to split you'd be entitled to half of it.
How about taking your own stash out of the joint account, so that you can put it towards something you would like - girls hol maybe? To the value of what he takes out in a year, you could probably have a great time on that, it's only fair

Can you explain how your finances are split at the moment? There's no point him taking money out of your joint account to invest in toys for himself for instance as those will not be half yours, will they?

If I'm paying for it, absolutely it is.

Really depends how finances work

With us, we share all money so what he buys affects me and what I buy affects him.
If you have separate finances and he is paying his fair share and it's not impacting on the household then it's up to him.

Anything coming out of the joint account is YOUR business.

Either you have total transparency and mutual decisions over the joint account or he pays out of his own money