How often do you talk to DP through the day?

[Iwanttenofthose]

Light-hearted post, obviously every relationship is different, but: how much do you communicate with your partner throughout the day when you're not together through texts, phone calls etc?

When we're at work we'll often exchange a few messages through the morning then H still wants to call for a chat at lunch. I find this a bit much and am often too busy. It's only 6-7 hours until we'll be sitting eating together! Then we watch tv and don't chat because we already know about each other's days 😆

During the week we have busy lives and don't see all that much of each other. So we speak on the phone for 30 mins while both commuting.

@CaliFrown

By way of a different perspective, my mum and dad have been happily married for 53 years, and Dad still works f/t (they got married and had children when they were very young). They only talk during the day if there's some major problem with one of their horses/dogs, and even then, would probably wait.

My mum and dad are like this. But they're from the generation before mobile phones. So my mum had to ring dad at his office. Personal calls were frowned upon, so she rarely did it.

She's still like this now, even with other people. My changing shift patterns have confused the hell out of her and now she only phones me at 4pm on a Saturday because she is certain I'm not working then.

Never ... unless a real emergency.

Like others I am of the pre mobile phone generation, it was just not 'a thing' to be in constant contact with each other, in fact when we first met my DH travelled a lot overseas and we relied on air mail letters and the occasional transatlantic phone call ... that sounds very old fashioned now .

I would not want to be disturbed by WhatsApp messages, chatty texts etc when I was at work or busy doing something else and neither would he.

On our working days, we work together so chat throughout the day. If we're not together, we text a lot. DH is the best at sending silly texts and pics to make me laugh. We're never short of things to say.

Rarely, and then only for practical reasons. When we're at work, we're at work. We're also from the generation that started work before mobiles so calls at work weren't a thing.

We do have lots to talk about every evening though, and often spend a good hour or two discussing what happened in our day/ work/ the world in general. I prefer this to short calls, although I'm sure some people do both

Almost never ... DH knows it is a life or death emergency if he gets a call at work. (His dad died. I had to go to hospital with heart issues... those were the 2 calls in the last 7 years)

Never. If DH called me at work I'd think something awful had happened.

Maybe occasionally a text asking him to get bread on the way home

Never, unless there's a very important reason to do so. Married 41 years. We understand each other perfectly.

Phone calls are rare.
Always a good morning text, DH leaves at 5.30 for work every morning. Check in text to say hi at lunch and then a get home safe text as he works 12 hour days. Will send pics if I am out and about with DDs.

My late DH and I didn't speak at all during the working day. We were working. Both of us compartmentalized our lives pretty efficiently, so work and home life didn't overlap any more than it had to. Obviously there might be a text to say one of us would be late home or something, by that was rare.

I had an assistant whose husband always wanted a lunchtime call. It was a pain in the neck to her and she clearly resented it, though she knew he needed it. I used to feel quite sorry for her. It was a duty.

Dh usually calls me on his lunch break (I'm SAHM at the moment). Sometimes also an odd text here and there. Then he usually calls me on his way home, just to say he's on his way or if I'm free just to chat.

You know other jobs are busy as well right? Not just teachers

I suspect that the poster meant that teachers can't use their phones during lesson time. The school I worked at introduced a rule that staff phones have to be kept in lockers.

We just text briefly if important or need something from the shops etc but obviously everyone is different.

Personally I would find it pretty stifling to speak several times a day. You also say you’re busy, is it interrupting your work day too much? Whilst it’s nice to acknowledge your DP wants to chat more but if it’s impacting your work then perhaps you should reduce it a tad.

All fecking day. However we do run our own business together

I do enjoy weekends where we're not together the whole time, and we're never in touch by phone/text unless it's an emergency as we both enjoy our own space.

A couple of texts a day; more if there's something particular to discuss (our flat is currently on the market so there's some logistical chat around viewings, sending links to new stuff on the market for us etc).

We'd never call each other during the day unless absolutely necessary / an emergency.

It varies day to day. Some days we don't speak or text at all, other days may be a quick text or call and some days we have several chats through the day.

DH works for himself so reasonably easy to make calls. I don't work so am at home most days.

We do like to check the other is ok and also like to chat. Even if we speak a couple of times during the day we always have things to talk about in the evening. Never seem to run out of things to talk about even after 42 years of marriage.

We are in our 60's so, obviously, didn't have mobile phones when younger but not sure why that would mean we wouldn't use them now.

Also the poster that said they are of an age that you didn't phone a workplace, well I worked in an office and from when we first met DH would phone me every day even though that meant using a phonebox.

If I am working late I’ll usually give him an ETA so that he can have the evening meal ready when I get home.

Otherwise, we don’t communicate at all.

Also the poster that said they are of an age that you didn't phone a workplace, well I worked in an office and from when we first met DH would phone me every day even though that meant using a phonebox

I’m of a similar age. That wouldn’t have been tolerated in any of the places I worked. No incoming private calls and no outgoing unless the single payphone was used.

We don’t really. I’m currently on maternity leave and he works.. well, all the time! I might text and ask what time he’s planning on being home/whether I’ll still be awake and during summer, it’s worth asking if he wants tea, as some customers provide it when he works late. He generally answers but the timeframe varies hugely. He drives/operates large machinery for his job, so it’s not quite like sitting at a desk using his phone!
That being said, over the winter months, he spends more time on the yard here at home, and that means he starts later, comes in for lunch for an hour and finishes earlier so we see a lot more of each other then. I’m sad to see the back of winter tbh.

That all being said, I send at least one or two snapchats a day. He loves seeing pictures and videos of our son

Sometimes not till he gets home after work but if I need to text / ring him in the day I will. It's usually about the kids or something I need him to do urgent. We usually always eat together at night but then sit in separate rooms to watch tele / read etc

@etulosba

Also the poster that said they are of an age that you didn't phone a workplace, well I worked in an office and from when we first met DH would phone me every day even though that meant using a phonebox

I’m of a similar age. That wouldn’t have been tolerated in any of the places I worked. No incoming private calls and no outgoing unless the single payphone was used.

I worked in a lot of solicitors' offices (temped for about 4 years) and not one of them objected to the staff getting personal phone calls.

Literally everyone received and made personal phone calls. The solicitors themselves some of the worst offenders.

One of my bosses would get numerous phone calls from her husband, her mum and the barrister she was having an affair with. I was always surprised she got any work done

In one office I worked, there was only one phone between 14 staff. In another, we all had a phone on our desk but outside lines had to be requested through the operator and a valid business related reason for the call had to be given (and was logged).

Couple of texts through the day. Sometimes I will give him a ring at lunch if i want to ask something or have something to discuss.

Numerous messages throughout the day, he often calls when he's about and about to.